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Oh My!

Posted by on Jul. 31, 2007 at 11:04 PM
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Here it is 3 weeks until I start back up at school teaching.  Usually at this time, I'm ready and looking forward to get back into my classroom and longing for my schooltime routine, but not this year.  I took the complete summer off-no teaching summer school this year.  My husband was so supportive when I told him that I didn't want to teach summer school.  I have enjoyed every minute of my summer with my daughter.  We have had the best vacation, yet we didn't do anything terribly exciting.  But we spent it together.  I don't feel up to working with kids right now.  I love my job, however as a remedial teacher I work with kids who are looking for attention and usually love.  It was so hard for me to go back to teaching after my Angel Kaylee past away in November this year, but I did because the bills had to be paid.  I tried to find a job outside of teaching that had similar wages/benefits but sadly I didn't find one.  I think God must want me to touch those childrens' lives, maybe to help me find peace with Kaylee having SIDS.  I feel that it would have been easier for me to deal with adults than kids, but i'm going back.  Is this how i'm going to feel for now on?  I hate that i'm not excited for the start of the new school year.  Teachers shouldn't begin the year this way, so how in 3 weeks can I change my perspective, or attitude?  I'd love some advice  Anitra

by on Jul. 31, 2007 at 11:04 PM
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Replies (1-2):
mochamominwa
by Group Admin on Aug. 1, 2007 at 2:17 PM
It  has not been long enough for  those  feeling  to  not be there .  There  is no  time table.   I  can  hear you still  want to  do  what you are  doing.  I  don't know if 3 weeks  will  change your feelings. however in  my  opinion  i  bet  that  those kis faces, hugs  and  antics  will  change your feeling on  being there.
vent  . share feelinggs  anytime ! 
A
ezear2000
by on Aug. 4, 2007 at 2:02 PM
In my personal opinion, My Hunter died 4 years ago and at first I couldn't shop the baby isle(this took about 1 year to just enter), I couldn't see other babies, anything having to do with babies and I tried to avoid it, to this day I cannot go to a baby shower( I have been to one about 2 years after we lost Hunter, but it was too hard and have not been back to one), But now I  find myself obsessed with babies. We have a LARGE family(on my husbands side) and there always seems to be a newborn and I love it, I think because I realize that these babies are not my Hunter and all babies are precious. Good luck with the start of the new year and give it time you are so new in your grief.                 Andrea
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