When I first found out I was pregnant, I was set on a natural birth. No pain killers, no IVs, being able to move and drink, absolutely no episiotomy, no Csection unless it's a medical emergency, waiting to cut the cord, being able to spend at least an hour with my baby and breastfeed before she is taken to be weighed and measured. There are no midwives in my area. The closest midwife is 45 minutes away, and she still births in a small hospital. The closest midwife group that has their own birthing center is an hour and 45 minutes away. I have not talked to my doctor about my birth plan yet, but when I preregistered for the hospital here a few days ago I asked them a few questions. No drinking or eating allowed at all. Only ice chips. I will be required to have an IV, if I refuse, then they will not treat me, which I know is true, I refused one for an ER visit in September when I went for severe abdominal pain and they sent me home and told me there was nothing they could do. They don't have birthing tubs. My options at this hospital are basically laying in a bed with an IV, being blown up like a balloon because they won't let me drink water. There are no hospitals within driving distancein active labor that will accomidate me. If one exists in this state at all.
My fiance doesn't understand my reasons for wanting a natural birth with no pain killers. He said he would want everything they could give him if he was giving birth. I really think he is going to have a major problem seeing me in pain. He freaks out now if I have any discomfort. He keeps telling me that I'm just being hormonal and people give birth like that in that hospital every day. That's not a comforting thought to me. My friends and family keep telling me I won't be able to handle it, that I will want the drugs. Everyone is trying to push the way they gave birth on me. I keep watching shows on natural births, half the time the woman gives birth, and everything is fine, the other half give up and end up getting the epidural. I always thought I had a high pain tolerance, but now I'm wondering if this is something I can handle. What if I can't? I'm going to hear "I told you so" for a year or more. I really want to breastfeed, but my nipples have been pierced twice and there is quite a lot of scar tissue, so I won't know if I actually can breastfeed until the day comes. I feel like I spent so much time making these plans, and now they're unraveling before I even get there.