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Natural Birth & Parenting Natural Birth & Parenting

If your natural birth did not occur, how do/did you cope???

Posted by on Nov. 6, 2010 at 6:26 PM
  • 2 Replies

I was so certain that this time I was really going to do it. I was going to have an unmedicated birth. I stayed home as long as I could. I really wish it could have been longer but due to living sittuations it couldn't. I feel that the first wrong turn was in triage when they did a check to see exactly how much dilated I was. I swear I felt the nurse break my water even though she claims it just broke. I had to repeat myself twice that I was not getting internal monitoring. I really think that her breaking my water caused my labor to progress more intensely than I could handle. Within 5hrs of that happening I was asking for an epidural. Even though logically I should have realized that at 8cm I was almost there and didn't need it. I wasn't thinking logically. Then of course it stops my labor and starts the next intervention of pit. Then when it's time for my son to be born we have to stop the epi so I can do what I'm supposed to be doing. I keep replaying those 9hrs over and over again in my head. That's right I was only in the hospital for 9 hrs of my labor and I had to ask for pain meds. The more I think about it the more upset I get. This was my last birth. DH and I decided that two children are all we can afford to raise. So there won't be another chance. So if anyone has had to go through this how did you manage?

by on Nov. 6, 2010 at 6:26 PM
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Replies (1-2):
doulala
by Gold Member on Nov. 6, 2010 at 7:11 PM

I think that having a lot of scenarios pre-discussed (like a Birth Plan) can help you to have a better idea for how to handle what might come up.
That along with a birth doula (or other very strong support/advocacy), you can be better "protected" and encouraged to work for your preferences.

When (unwanted) things do happen we will need time to heal and think and process, to tell our story and ask questions...    Dealing with the grief and sorrow is really important.

My first birth was bumpy and I did need to work through emotional healing after.   It was a lonnng healing process even though I had a lovely out-of-hospital waterbirth.   There were things about my birth that really hit hard.    Fortunately, being among friends and talking about it, I was better able to get myself back up again.  

Reading and birth classes, mother's groups (like LLL), attending other births, videos...    so much contributed to my healing.

There are things we can do to avoid complications and there are ways to work through the afternmath.   Do not dismiss anything, it is all relevant~


Hugs, sweetie!!



DixieFlower
by on Nov. 6, 2010 at 7:31 PM

Thanks :)  I did have a birth plan and a doula. I talked with her this past week about something that I had vaguely remembered being mentioned to me while I was laboring. It was about the internal monitors and them being able to unhook them after they got the reading so I could still be mobile and with those they said they could monitor me standing. (my problem was having to be monitored on my side for 20 min) When I asked my doula about it she said yes they had mentioned that to me. I however, didn't even remember anything being said about it until this past week. She says that she had repeated what they said to me when I asked for the epi. My husband says that he repeated it to me twice once when I asked for the epi and again when the anasthesiologist arrived. I don't remember any of that. My doula said that it was probably due to me being so involved with working through my contractions that I just tuned everything else out. She said that now that everything is over and done with I'm remembering bits and pieces. That hindsight is always 20/20.

Quoting doulala:

I think that having a lot of scenarios pre-discussed (like a Birth Plan) can help you to have a better idea for how to handle what might come up.
That along with a birth doula (or other very strong support/advocacy), you can be better "protected" and encouraged to work for your preferences.

When (unwanted) things do happen we will need time to heal and think and process, to tell our story and ask questions...    Dealing with the grief and sorrow is really important.

My first birth was bumpy and I did need to work through emotional healing after.   It was a lonnng healing process even though I had a lovely out-of-hospital waterbirth.   There were things about my birth that really hit hard.    Fortunately, being among friends and talking about it, I was better able to get myself back up again.  

Reading and birth classes, mother's groups (like LLL), attending other births, videos...    so much contributed to my healing.

There are things we can do to avoid complications and there are ways to work through the afternmath.   Do not dismiss anything, it is all relevant~


Hugs, sweetie!!




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