i just read another post in a different group that i found really disturbing :(
it was in regards to birth rape and i cant believe the amount of woman who either dont believe that it exists or think that woman who have experienced it are being insensitive to "real" rape survivors by calling it that. i personally know a few woman who felt like they were raped/assaulted during their births and for them it was a very real, terrifying experience.
they felt secluded, they were yelled at, they were threatened, they were forcibly held down, they had hands or medical instruments inserted into them without their consent and in some cases are drugged and cut open and have their babies taken away from them.
how can an experience like that not be rape? rape isnt just a purely sexual assault, rape by definition is when another person takes something away from your forcibly....and in cases of birth rape what is taken away is choice and the ability to advocate for your own personal beliefs and your body.
as a rape survivor myself i dont beleive its my job to dictate how another woman feels about being assaulted. i do not take offense when i hear the word birth rape or try to compare it to my own experience because that is just wrong. it makes me sad that there are actually woman who think that birth rape is acceptable just because a medical doctor is the one doing the assaulting....i dont care how many letters you have after your name it does not give you the right to take away a women's choice!
That is horrible I'm glad I've never experienced that, I'm so sorry that you have!
luckily i have not experinced birth rape either...but i have two friends who went through similar experiences as to what i wrote and to degrade them even more by calling them attention whores (yes that was a term used in another post) or sue happy is just asinine! i dont think its my job as a rape survivor to compare my rape experience with someone elses in order to degrade them and make them feel like they didnt have it as bad as i did so they should just shut up and be glad they had a "healthy baby". who even thinks like that?
when i look back at my birthing experience i am so glad i ws able to have a safe birth in the comfort of my own home without having to feel victimized by the experience. birth is supposed to be a wonderful experience, not something that leaves emotional scars :(
Quoting Sarah725:That is horrible I'm glad I've never experienced that, I'm so sorry that you have!
thank you! i should know better than to even visit confessions...that place is filled with mean woman who have no compassion for anyone else!
Quoting MaryJarrett:
I feel the same way you do!!
100% agree...
Just another reason why I think some woman are very disconnected with their womanly/human/motherly insticts. Some dont even want to see/feel that they are being taking advantage of...
It also brings to mind a thing i seen on Pinterest a while back that said "Its not consent if you make me afraid to say no".. So often when it comes to visiting drs, we are afraid to say no to ultrasounds/test/vaginal exams.
yes. some woman who experience birth rape also had their babies taken from them against their wishes, and not for the babies safety (like to a nicu for instance) but because that was what the doctor ordered. can you imagine what it would be like to have your brand new baby taken from you for hours (sometimes closer to a full day) without your consent and to not be able to see them or touch them and to have them be given shots and formula that you did not consent to? i think if that happened to me i would honestly go crazy....
Quoting 1stpreggers:
Babies taken away?are you referring to labor ?
I have not experienced any of those things, but I completely agree with you. If a woman feels violated who's to say that her feelings are wrong, regardless of how the violation happened. Being pregnant, everyone I know feels at liberty to tell me their birth stories (or those of a woman they know) and all too often I have heard the words, "well as long as the baby is healthy, that's all that matters right". What happened in our society that women are yet again being looked at merely as baby carriers, and not autonomous beings?
I applaud you, tansyflower, for speaking up about this issue.
I agree with you.
Crunchy Moms ~ La Leche League ~ Natural Family Planning
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Confessions is like hanging out with the catty girls from high school.
Quoting tansyflower:thank you! i should know better than to even visit confessions...that place is filled with mean woman who have no compassion for anyone else!
Quoting MaryJarrett:
I feel the same way you do!!
the important thing about yelling
- tansyflower
on Mar. 22, 2012 at 8:53 PM