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Natural Birth & Parenting Natural Birth & Parenting
I'm sure I'm not going to say this the right way lol...

But I LOVE spending time with my daughter. Sure, it's nice to shower alone or have a solid hour where no one is touching me/needs anything. But I'm with her pretty much 24/7 (we even cosleep) and I don't get sick of being with her. We play, read, snuggle, go on errands or for walks...

Dh and I even go on a date once a month or so for a few hours, and we have tons of fun, but I'm always excited to get home and kiss her. And he's the same - he's working on starting his own company so he can be home with us.

But it doesn't seem that way with any of our friends. They're always talking about wanting a break from their kids or how much they need a vacation or weekend away without their kid (some even do on a regular basis - leave their kid with their parents and go out of town for a concert or hotel stay). How we need to plan more nights where the kids go to a sitters so we can have adult time (we all get together once a week with dh's and kids).

I know they love their kids, it just feels like they're more of a nuisance to them. When they fuss, they just put a paci in their mouth. They put them in their bouncy seats or entertainers so they can socialize or do something else. They sleep train them so they can get them to sleep through the night as young as possible. They complain when they're exploring and getting into stuff, but they don't get on the floor and play with them.

I just don't get it.
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by on Apr. 26, 2012 at 11:04 PM
Replies (11-20):
sreichelt26
by Bronze Member on Apr. 26, 2012 at 11:53 PM
No, I totally get it. And that's what dh said too - we do very peaceful/mindful/attachment parenting and all our friends do very traditional parenting (spanking, making children accommodate the parent's lives, sleep training, weaning early or not bf at all).

And yes, we get told all.the.time how chill dd is. She behaves very well and is totally fine when we're shopping or at restaurants. Rarely throws tantrums. Totally opposite of their kids. But I think they see how all their kids act as the norm, so they don't notice.


Quoting haleykj:

I'm def more like you. And I feel the same about some of my friends and their kids. My girl is just a baby but I know that's not why. I think its just because of a different mineshaft and parenting style. I never get sick of her even when I do have a moment alone. When I'm doing homework and she just wants to play, I stop doing it to pla wither ven if it means rushing thru it later and I have never left her yet (almost 7 months) except one night for a couple hours. And I was worried about her the whole time the. SO excited to go home n see her. My friends want me to wean her and sleeptrain her just to stay out

all night And party this summer and I don't get that. Why? Sometimes it can be hard to not have a social life but that has nothing to do with her so in that respect I would like a break(like having friends over once in a while or something WITH the kids). Anyway. I've been thinking about this a lot lately. My DD is so calm n quiet and happy all the time it seems others' kids are loud and unhappy and screaming all the time. (hats exaggerated but u know what I mean).
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Brandy85412
by on Apr. 27, 2012 at 12:00 AM

me too! I like having a night off here and there too. My mom will take the older two over night some times 2. After 2 I miss them like crazy. The break is so nice and reminds me how much I love them. My mom even took them for 4 days after I had baby #3 it was so nice! But I felt like crying I missed them so much after 3 days.

It gets wearing having three kids around to take care of 24/7 moms need some breathing time. Every other job has breaks and time off. Why can't a mom?

Quoting VintageWife:

Maybe I'm the horrible mom in here, but I love going to the grocery and stuff alone. I've actually had a couple times where I got away for 5 hrs with no kids and loved it.


sreichelt26
by Bronze Member on Apr. 27, 2012 at 12:05 AM
No, I get that. These people each have one kid or just had their second (but have been like this since their firsts were still babies). So they just now have multiple children...

Quoting Brandy85412:

me too! I like having a night off here and there too. My mom will take the older two over night some times 2. After 2 I miss them like crazy. The break is so nice and reminds me how much I love them. My mom even took them for 4 days after I had baby #3 it was so nice! But I felt like crying I missed them so much after 3 days.

It gets wearing having three kids around to take care of 24/7 moms need some breathing time. Every other job has breaks and time off. Why can't a mom?

Quoting VintageWife:

Maybe I'm the horrible mom in here, but I love going to the grocery and stuff alone. I've actually had a couple times where I got away for 5 hrs with no kids and loved it.


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Naegore
by Bronze Member on Apr. 27, 2012 at 1:09 AM
We love spending time with ds. He fills most of our world. We hate to even go on dates without him. But, I do still enjoy having time to myself. Ds and I are literally together all day because we homeschool. And ds mainly sleeps with us, so, I do enjoy getting an hour here or there to take a nice soak with bath salts and my lavendar bubble bath, and candles :-) or i may just read.
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peaches_04
by Platinum Member on Apr. 27, 2012 at 1:16 AM
Little breaks I love but by the end of my work shift I miss my baby like crazy:(
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peaches_04
by Platinum Member on Apr. 27, 2012 at 1:16 AM
Little breaks I love but by the end of my work shift I miss my baby like crazy:(
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JBbean
by on Apr. 27, 2012 at 1:18 AM

I hear ya!! I've made mommy friends, but they all just wanted to bag their children off on me any chance they could get. My son has been babysat once and DH and I ended up getting teary while he was gone because we missed him. We love every minute of being a family and spending time together!!

Clubpenguin
by on Apr. 27, 2012 at 9:22 AM
I am like you.they are only little for so long and I don't want to miss any of it.
ilostmy_keys
by on Apr. 27, 2012 at 9:29 AM
I wont lie - the judge-y "Im a better mom than anyone else because I xyz" is getting pretty old in here. Who cares if parents use bouncy seats or if they hold their kid 24/7?? It is like some moms are constantly having to validate their choices. Is this your first child?
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Baby_Avas_Momma
by on Apr. 27, 2012 at 9:53 AM
Oh thank goodness I'm not the only one!! lol
DD is almost 14 months old and never leaves our side!! Where we go, she goes. My family thinks we're crazy and get mad that we don't let anyone babysit, ever! Haha.... they don't understand how going anywhere with a toddler is any fun. We love bringing her everywhere with us! She's always happy and well-behaved and waves to everyone lol. Mine and Df's relationship is better than ever, having her with us all the time brings us closer together. When she goes to bed, we have our alone time. It's what works for us and we love it :)
Oh and plus she still's nurses very frequently and my pump got packed away a longgggg time ago and I don't trust our family's to *not* feed her garbage!
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