still cant get over it

Ok. My birth was the worst experience ever. I was birth raped. From the nurse attempting to manually dilate me. I thought she was checking me but refused to remove her hand even though I was screaming. They hung pitocin and refused to turn it off. Completely ignored me. My dr was talking on her phone with her hand in me. She told me "the baby didn't get in there with your legs that close together, she isn't coming out like that either", didn't delay cord clamping. I told her not to cut it and she just looked at me and did anyway. Bitched about having to leave her sons birthday party to deliver mine.
Do I need to go to therapy? Would it help? My dd is 13 months and it still pisses me off. There were other things (like them doing eye goop when I said no, and had needle in hand about to do vit K and I had to scream). Handing off my dd instead of giving her to me. Her APGAR was 8 so no reason. It has been a long time to still bother me.

[FebPenguins]

Quoting kitty8199:

I need to get over this but I just cant

I am not an expert by any means, but to me this is not just something "you need to get over". There is a reason you "just can't". Sounds like you need some professional help. Be strong, be brave. The more women like you share, the more chance others have in knowing what could happen.

[kitty8199]

I was having a bad reaction to the pit. I could barely move and was confused. Reading later I found that was an allergic reaction.

Quoting peaches_04:

I would have removed the iv and walked out of the hospital

[kitty8199]

Nothing went my way. I didn't even get milk for a week. She didn't pee so I know it was a supply issue. I kept nursing and supplementing until I got it. Someone told me the bad birth could've done that.

Quoting FebPenguins:

Quoting kitty8199:

I need to get over this but I just cant

I am not an expert by any means, but to me this is not just something "you need to get over". There is a reason you "just can't". Sounds like you need some professional help. Be strong, be brave. The more women like you share, the more chance others have in knowing what could happen.

[kittenmom001]

My daughters birth was dramatic as well, though not that bad.. Yes I would go to consuling