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Natural Birth & Parenting Natural Birth & Parenting

No cry - please help!

Posted by on Aug. 6, 2012 at 5:56 PM
  • 12 Replies

I've been reading The No Cry Sleep Solution and have started putting some of the ideas into place and we have seen some improvement, so that's wonderful and all... But naps are just horrendous. The whole point of the program is "no cry"... But how am I supposed to do that when DD SCREAMS bloody murder at nap time? It's not all the time... We have improved nap times tremendously. But sometimes even though she is yawning and rubbing her eyes and clearly tired, she fights it so bad. We still swaddle her because she will still wake herself up by moving her arms. So I swaddle her and nurse her and rock her, I'll walk, "shush", sing, hum, bounce, everything I can possibly think of but if she doesn't want to sleep, she just screams no matter what I do. So then I'm faced with this dilemma: Do I just give in and let her play (even though she'll be super fussy because she is TIRED) and let her become overtired and have another fight on my hands in an hour or two... Or do I just keep rocking, walking, etc. until she gives up and goes to sleep? It can't be good for her to cry herself to sleep (even though she's in my arms and knows she's being taken care of), but it's also not good for her to get overtired because that was our whole problem to begin with. 

What would you do in this situation???

CafeMom Tickers
by on Aug. 6, 2012 at 5:56 PM
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Replies (1-10):
QueenOfTheDiva
by on Aug. 6, 2012 at 6:00 PM

I am not familiar with this book, but I think being hands-on about your child's needs is great :) Being there and doing something about her cries is important and will build her trust. I think starting a good sleep routine is important. Your child does seem very young. I wouldn't worry too much about getting it perfect yet and just focus on meeting your child's needs and responding to her cries. Sounds like you're doing just fine.

mjrex87
by Mindy on Aug. 6, 2012 at 6:07 PM

Thank you.

The biggest issue we've had is with her getting overtired from not taking good naps and not having a good nighttime routine (which I realized after reading the book). I know she's not old enough to have a great routine down, I'm just worried about the screaming. :-/

Quoting QueenOfTheDiva:

I am not familiar with this book, but I think being hands-on about your child's needs is great :) Being there and doing something about her cries is important and will build her trust. I think starting a good sleep routine is important. Your child does seem very young. I wouldn't worry too much about getting it perfect yet and just focus on meeting your child's needs and responding to her cries. Sounds like you're doing just fine.


mrsrobin
by on Aug. 6, 2012 at 6:12 PM
I know it's hard, but when my DD fought sleep like that we comforted her and held her until she fell asleep. Even if she was crying.
It's not considered crying it out if you're there for comfort and her needs. I had some times DD cried in my arms until she fell asleep. Sometimes I think they just need to cry.
This is a personal choice and I would NEVER say to leave her when crying, but my daughter would be crabby and never sleep if were let her. She sleeps 12 hours at night and takes 2 hour naps at almost 2 years old. It's just her.

She doesn't cry at nap and bed time often, but sometimes I think she gets so tired she doesn't like the feeling and cries.
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QueenOfTheDiva
by on Aug. 6, 2012 at 6:18 PM
1 mom liked this

No problem ;) I think it's just natural for the baby to cry since they cannot express their needs or wants otherwise. So long as you're meeting her needs and soothing her, there's not much else you can really do. I think once your baby starts talking, things will get easier. For now, just focus on meeting her needs. That's what my Child Development teacher taught me. (Trust vs. Mistrust stage)

Quoting mjrex87:

Thank you.

The biggest issue we've had is with her getting overtired from not taking good naps and not having a good nighttime routine (which I realized after reading the book). I know she's not old enough to have a great routine down, I'm just worried about the screaming. :-/

Quoting QueenOfTheDiva:

I am not familiar with this book, but I think being hands-on about your child's needs is great :) Being there and doing something about her cries is important and will build her trust. I think starting a good sleep routine is important. Your child does seem very young. I wouldn't worry too much about getting it perfect yet and just focus on meeting your child's needs and responding to her cries. Sounds like you're doing just fine.



Mrs.Salz
by on Aug. 6, 2012 at 6:38 PM

We deal with something similar with our 17 month old. I keep rocking, holding, etc. until he falls asleep. The amount of time he fights the nap has reduced a lot. It's not considered CIO if you are holding her and working to meet her needs.

Have you tried putting her to sleep on her tummy so that arm movement doesn't wake her up?

tabi_cat1023
by Group Mod - Tabitha on Aug. 6, 2012 at 6:44 PM
How old is she?
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swmmra
by on Aug. 6, 2012 at 8:52 PM
1 mom liked this

she is 5 month? For nap times I would go ahead and hold her and rock her until she is almost fully asleep, that nice inbetween state, then put her down where you want her to sleep (before she is fully asleep) and pat her belly and "shhh" sounds. Routine is so important, can't hurt to start early, good luck! 

mjrex87
by Mindy on Aug. 6, 2012 at 9:34 PM

That's what I keep telling myself but it's definitely hard :-/ Thanks for the reassurance.

Quoting mrsrobin:

I know it's hard, but when my DD fought sleep like that we comforted her and held her until she fell asleep. Even if she was crying.
It's not considered crying it out if you're there for comfort and her needs.
I had some times DD cried in my arms until she fell asleep. Sometimes I think they just need to cry.
This is a personal choice and I would NEVER say to leave her when crying, but my daughter would be crabby and never sleep if were let her. She sleeps 12 hours at night and takes 2 hour naps at almost 2 years old. It's just her.

She doesn't cry at nap and bed time often, but sometimes I think she gets so tired she doesn't like the feeling and cries.


mjrex87
by Mindy on Aug. 6, 2012 at 9:38 PM

Not yet. She doesn't roll...She can, but she hasn't done it in weeks. It's like she forgot that she knows how to do it. So I'm not comfortable with it yet.

Quoting Mrs.Salz:

We deal with something similar with our 17 month old. I keep rocking, holding, etc. until he falls asleep. The amount of time he fights the nap has reduced a lot. It's not considered CIO if you are holding her and working to meet her needs.

Have you tried putting her to sleep on her tummy so that arm movement doesn't wake her up?


mjrex87
by Mindy on Aug. 6, 2012 at 9:39 PM

5 months

Quoting tabi_cat1023:

How old is she?


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