I'm needing some support.

[MyIslandGirls]

I'm on the verge of tears over this... and i seriously hope i don't get bashed because i so can't handle that right now.

I just found out that i am expecting my 4th child. I'm about 5 weeks along. Due in the spring.

This is not good timing at all and my hubby and I are heart sick over this.

We already have 3 children... and yes we wanted more but in 3 years time. we are not in a position to have a 4th right now.

I am SOO completely torn here. My heart and gut says keep... but my brain is saying "NO!! you can't this will ruin everything!!"

If we are going to do something about this we have to figure it out with in the next week or so....

I feel like Termination is off the table for me... It would RUIN me i think. And Hubby says Adoption is out for him.. but we borth aren't sure if it's viable to keep... I don't know what to do here anymore. I've thought this to death.. and the only thing i can come up with is KEEPING becuase i so very much want this baby.

Oh man i just can't seem to explain anything. I need some sort of plan.  I am soo mixed up and confused and heartbroken...

[Nicolle_09]

Remember you are never given more then you can handle. Neither of my boys came when the time was right but things worked out both times. Only advice is to relax and take it day by day. 

[louzannalady]

*hug* I know, it seems rough, now, but I promise, it will work out. As my aunt says, babies always fit into your budget. I cannot tell you how many times, a baby was a surprise, only for a few years later, for various reasons conceiving and bearing another one would not have been a physical possibility. I firmly believe it happens for a reason. *hug* I don't know what else to say and I hope my words have been encouraging in some way. 

[MyIslandGirls]

all my kids have been a surprise.. and all of them were welcome ones.... except this one. i am simple devistated over this.  I just bought a 3 month supply of birth control pills because i didn't want to be worrying about pregnancy!!! I want this baby but there is soo much more to this than just how i feel.

[jellyphish]

Oh man, I was so here a year ago, I know EXACTLY how you feel and have had the same thoughts. I'll spare you my story, just know you are in empathetic company.

Try to find some quiet time to meditate about it, the answer will come. Good luck with your husband, I really hope you can get on the same page. And you know what, I bet you will if you both work through it respectfully.

[cpflum08]

Hugs mama! I was in your boat about 8 months ago. Now with 5 weeks to go till baby comes I'm excited and can't wait for her to get here.

[wife-4-life]

None of my kids were planned. I have two and am 20 1/2 wks preg with #3. I felt/sometimes still feel the same as you do. But terminations and adoptions are not options for us. I prayed a lot about it. I had just had a MC two months before we conceived #3 and was not grieved how I should have because we are not in a good place/time to have another. I wanted 2 1/2 yrs between all my kids, I got 16 months and what will be 18 months gaps. I also thought that, realistically if we sat down and planned when a "good, convenient" time for a baby is, we would never have a child yet and my babies are my life. Things have been so unstable financially and job wise these 5 1/2 yrs of marriage. It's hard but you can do it. If its financial reasons, look into state insurance and assistance. There is NOTHING wrong with getting help when you need it, until you can get back on your feet.

Just know you are not alone in how you are feeling. I'm praying for you. It'll be ok. :)

[MyIslandGirls]

I'm not alone as my hubby is feeling the same way as i am. heartsick and confused.

I just want to be happy about this... joyful!!!!!!

[moroccanmommy]

Well..your going to have a baby. When this baby looks in both your eyes you will forget about how u feel right now. You stated no term no adopt...so that means you have to accept you are having a baby. Hugs

[melindabelcher]

You have to do whats right for your family. Make a pro/con list of all possibilities.
I personally am strongly against terminating a pregnancy. I feel if it is something that is that serious to make the honorable decision of adoption. I know my beliefs arent that of every body. But I don't understand how someone is willing to kill theyre own child but not willing to give them life through someone else?

[MyIslandGirls]

^This is how i feel as well