Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Natural Birth & Parenting Natural Birth & Parenting

Dealing with family at the holidays

Posted by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 9:57 PM
  • 26 Replies
Do you have *those* family members who always stick their nose in to your parenting business? What do they bug you about and how do you deal with it?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 9:57 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
hapababies
by Silver Member on Nov. 21, 2012 at 9:59 PM
1 mom liked this
Smile and nod. Lol.
It's not worth the aggravation and I don't see them often enough to waste my energy on them.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
jconney80
by Group Mod on Nov. 21, 2012 at 10:04 PM
1 mom liked this
I have one aunt who can be obnoxious. She thinks nursing past 6 months is too long and through toddlerhood is just... Well.. Disgusting. She knew I was still nursing my son last year because we ordered food to eat and I couldn't eat what he is allergic to. He was 21-22 months old. She asked my mom totally disgusted "WHEN is she going to wean him?!?! That's just gross!" luckily, she didn't bother me about it. I still like her and understand she's just clueless. She's never had kids so she can't begin to understand. I just laugh stuff off with her and make jokes back when she says something.

I have to admit that I'm glad I'm not dealing with my in laws at the holidays. My SIL and FIL don't hold back on what they say about how we parent. After our summer vacation with them I really know it would be annoying. My SIL is certain I'm damaging my youngest because she doesn't like other people and I don't force her (then only 9 months old) to go to strangers. She wouldn't let up so I can only imagine that we would be at each others throats. I didn't back down with her.

With anyone who says something borderline obnoxious (obviously if they're honestly interested I'm more than happy to answer) I try to brush it off but I don't argue. I just say that is how we choose to do things and leave it at that.

My kids should speak for themselves though. Markus is one independent smart little guy and he amazes my aunt and uncle so IDK how they can find fault with what we do :P
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
jconney80
by Group Mod on Nov. 21, 2012 at 10:05 PM
2 moms liked this
Exactly! LOL I'm with you on that. I change the subject or crack jokes. I think people back down when they see they aren't getting a rise out of you

Quoting hapababies:

Smile and nod. Lol.

It's not worth the aggravation and I don't see them often enough to waste my energy on them.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Emadele
by Member on Nov. 21, 2012 at 10:08 PM
Lol. Omg. And it's not just the holidays cause we see them constantly. But recently my FIL has been convinced that we are stunting my 2.5yr olds physical growth by not keeping him warm enough. Mainly because we take his coat off before strapping him in his carseat. And now he has his wife believing this too. (Just posted in another group about this) they have always been harping on us about bundling him up. It's not like I let him run around under dressed all the time. But they think he should always have about 3 more layers on.
As far as dealing with it, we find documentation that proves our point and try to educate them. Right now they are refusing to believe us that we are doing what is safest and he's not cold (or even chilly for that matter).


Married to Russell (7/27/09), Momma to Haydn (5/27/10) and Donavyn (8/1/12).
jconney80
by Group Mod on Nov. 21, 2012 at 10:11 PM
Oh sheesh! That's crazy. I've only put a coat on my kids when they're playing outside or we are actually outside longer than walking to the car or back inside. I'm glad you're informed. I always make up a joke about how they are always coming up with new info and it changes all the time.

Quoting Emadele:

Lol. Omg. And it's not just the holidays cause we see them constantly. But recently my FIL has been convinced that we are stunting my 2.5yr olds physical growth by not keeping him warm enough. Mainly because we take his coat off before strapping him in his carseat. And now he has his wife believing this too. (Just posted in another group about this) they have always been harping on us about bundling him up. It's not like I let him run around under dressed all the time. But they think he should always have about 3 more layers on.

As far as dealing with it, we find documentation that proves our point and try to educate them. Right now they are refusing to believe us that we are doing what is safest and he's not cold (or even chilly for that matter).





Posted on CafeMom Mobile
thundersky
by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 10:15 PM

i have problems with my dad and how he deals with my strong willed indepindent dd. i use more gental disiplen and he thinks that any resistance from a child is them willfully being disrespectfull and must be crushed with enouph force so it never happens again. i have a big problem with that and doing what i can to make my dad see that there are other ways to handle my dd.

VintageWife
by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 10:15 PM
3 moms liked this

I'm just not even going to deal with people any more. If they have something to say, I'm going to tell them they had a chance to raise kids and they have no business in mine.

jconney80
by Group Mod on Nov. 21, 2012 at 10:21 PM
My dad is the same way. He's not the type that you can just ignore. He will try to do something about it. I have to step in and say something.

Quoting thundersky:

i have problems with my dad and how he deals with my strong willed indepindent dd. i use more gental disiplen and he thinks that any resistance from a child is them willfully being disrespectfull and must be crushed with enouph force so it never happens again. i have a big problem with that and doing what i can to make my dad see that there are other ways to handle my dd.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
jconney80
by Group Mod on Nov. 21, 2012 at 10:22 PM
Very assertive

Quoting VintageWife:

I'm just not even going to deal with people any more. If they have something to say, I'm going to tell them they had a chance to raise kids and they have no business in mine.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
justone_jen
by Bronze Member on Nov. 21, 2012 at 10:24 PM
1 mom liked this
This is where I am. No one is owed an explanation.

Quoting VintageWife:

I'm just not even going to deal with people any more. If they have something to say, I'm going to tell them they had a chance to raise kids and they have no business in mine.

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN