second thought about a homebirth
I posted the other day about my dh not wanting me to have our baby at home. well we went to see the midwife and he has agreed to be open to the idea. I was very excited now i dont know what i want. all I feel about the whole birth process is scared. this will be my second vbac. i had no pain meds with the first so i feel more prepared this time for the actual delivery. the thing that is bothering me is this is my second vbac. i went into the vbac group and read about someone that wanted to vbac a second time and had a c section. the doctor told her there was a window in her uterus. After reading that I just feel sooooo panicky. With my first vbac I was not afraid at all. I dont know where to go from here, thank god i have a lot of time. i wish there was some way to check and maybe grade the scar at the end.
my homebirth pros:
no car ride while having contraction (we are about an hour driving the speed limit to the hospital)
I know it would be much more hands off
the comforts of being home
20 min to the nearest no vbac hospital (only for emergency)
big birth pool
not having to worry if my house is clean lol (a bit ocd)
the mw promised to keep the hospital staff away
being on monitors the whole time
feeling like i have no control over what will happen
Can you share with me why you choose a home birth? any good resource on home birth? any books you can recommend? sorry this is kind of a long vent. i dont really have anyone else to talk to about this.