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unhappy baby

Posted by on May. 29, 2013 at 3:13 PM
  • 13 Replies

Anyone have tips or insights on how to deal with a perpetually unhappy baby?

At 14 weeks now he's so much happier than he was for the first six weeks while we worked through colic, oversupply, and dairy sensitivity, but he's still crabby and unhappy a lot. Not teething, not gassy, sees the chiropractor, had craniosacral work done, ebf on cue, is intact, not vaccinated, cosleeps, rides in the carrier....  I've done everything I can think of to make his life as easy as possible and he's just unhappy.

He always has to be held in certain positions or he's fussy. He already doesn't like strangers, even DH, and I can never just sit and hold him on my lap. He needs to be constantly moving and/or bounced. We can't even sit still to nurse (except at night) - he won't latch or suck unless I'm walking and moving. Sometimes I can sit in the rocking chair. He won't take a pacifier either.

As much as I love him, it's been so hard to enjoy him because he's so fussy and particular. Any ideas on something I'm missing or maybe haven't thought of? I just want a happy baby :(

by on May. 29, 2013 at 3:13 PM
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by Platinum Member on May. 29, 2013 at 3:16 PM
I'm sorry. I was in that situation with the Little too. NOTHING worked, I just had to wait out the phase. It sucked balls. I kept trying all the same things over and over and she eventually took a paci and that was that. I think that was around three months or so.
So yeah, just keep on keeping on and it'll come to an end. Hopefully you'll find something sooner than that.
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by on May. 29, 2013 at 3:33 PM

Over stimulation? Understimulation? Some babies are over sensitive to stimulus and really get upset and don't know how to handle it. Is he better when it is quiet or loud? Light or dark? Cooler or warmer? Wrapped or naked? Sometimes a brief bath (just water- no soap and maybe a little epsom salts added to keep the skin hydrated) a few times a day can keep them even keeled. Water is really soothing, even take the time to draw a bath for yourself and have some snuggle time in there. 

by Tabi - Admin on May. 29, 2013 at 3:42 PM

Sounds like my now 9 year old, I foud out years later he has a sensory disorder and thats what made him so grumpy.  Its a personality thing.  My guy is still grumpy at 9, BUT since he knows what bugs him he can tell us,

by Bronze Member on May. 29, 2013 at 3:48 PM
Keep trying and try some things again. Some things worked some of the time with my second.

Have you put him o ntop of the dryer?

My best advice is to rest absolutely whenever you get the chance. Hang in there. Remember the screaming moments. :) It's about the only memories I have of my Daniel, but he sure does love to hear the stories of his screams and ALL mommy and daddy did to try and calm him. They have become precious memories - mostly because they are all I have. But I do so love seeing his face light up as I talk about those months and months!

And in the end, you will be strengthened and encouraged, realizing how much you were able to endure and survive with so little sleep. :)

Oh, one more thing. My guys stomach seemed to bother him. That was what my mommy gut told me. I hace since heard of moms using probiotics and their child making huge improvements!
by on May. 29, 2013 at 3:59 PM
Have you tried white noise or water noises?

Do you do swings, bouncey chairs, things like that? It could be worth a try.

by on May. 29, 2013 at 5:22 PM

 My sister had a very colic baby and she said there's nothing you can do to fix the problem.  I don't know if I believe that.  Maybe change in environment could help.

by on May. 29, 2013 at 5:52 PM

I wish I had some tips for you. Our son, turning three this summer, began life just as you described above ... and things never got better no matter what we tried.  We are now undergoing evaluation with pyschiatrist / pyschologist and are hopeful we are going in the right direction since his perpetual fussiness has turned into more clearly labeled behaviors that are affecting his development and social skills.  I only share that to say, keep looking and talking about your baby's responses to your good parenting efforts.  Maybe some babies are slow to respond to attachment style parenting, but usually, I think there is something bigger going on.  Best of luck to you and your little one. 

by on May. 29, 2013 at 6:10 PM
My second child was cranky and particular too. Dealing with his dairy intolerance and reflux certainly helped, but he was still a more challenging baby. He eventually outgrew it, but we basically endured it until then.
Once he became mobile it definitely got better, but car rides were hell until he turned 1 and sleep was an issue until he was 2.
However now at 4 he's a happy, healthy, thriving boy.
Hang in there, it's nothing you're doing. That was the big lesson I learned with him.
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by Bronze Member on May. 29, 2013 at 6:20 PM
Oh, and just wanted to add, I think my son's personality made the colic even worse. He would anger so easily and start screaming. It was clearly anger. I don't know how I knew, it was just obvious that he was frustrated and angry. Plus I think he is more sensitive to pain and easily frustrated.

At 6 years old he still screams out in his sleep. He gets SO angry if he can't breathe through his nose or his stomach is bothering him . It make sfor long nights as he screams and hollers in his sleep. We have been working with him for the last six years on responding to frustration better and he IS doing better. But I look back on those infant days and would guess a lot of the screaming was his frustration and that was the only way he knew to respond. :)
by on May. 30, 2013 at 12:07 AM

IDK, mama.. you might have to just give it time. 

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