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Heart hurts I think I may have caused my son to wean..UPDATE

Posted by on May. 29, 2013 at 6:23 PM
  • 24 Replies

He is newly 3 and I am 31 weeks preggers tomorrow, since colostrum came in he nurses every single night before bed, he had backed off to every other day for a while.  Saturday night he was latching on to nurse but then decided to move all over and in the process bit me BAD, I howled ow stop biting and he bit harder, I said it 3 more times and he bit 3 more times.  At this point he put his hand over my mouth so that he didnt have to hear me fussing at hime.  I grabbed his hand and told him you DO NOT put your hand over mommies mouth.  He broke latch and screamed and cried and refused to nurse anymore..which was fine.  Well everynight since then he has not asked to nurse and he even said nope no more milk.  He woke up in the middle of the night and told hubby I NEED boobies..he brought him to me and he laid his head on them but refused to nurse when I offered.  I'm scared I caused a strike that will be weaning.  It makes me sad because Friday night he nursed to sleep and it was wnderful but our LAST nursing I yelled at him and made him cry.  I just wat to cry.

Dont tell me its ok he is 3, you did a good job.  Thats not what I want to hear.  If he would nurse ONE last time and then be done I would be fine, its just I dont that as my or his last nursing memory if that makes sense.

Has this happened to anyone else and their LO not stop nursing and go back atleast once more?


UPDATE: He refused last night, but this morning he woke up before I headed to work, was snuggling in the glider(which is rare) and asked to nurse.  I was sure he would refuse once I started to pull up my shirt but nope, he nursed and even made me late to work lol.  He cried when I finally had to tell him I had to leave and he asked to have boobies when I got home!

by on May. 29, 2013 at 6:23 PM
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Replies (1-10):
jellyphish
by Platinum Member on May. 29, 2013 at 6:30 PM
1 mom liked this
Well, you definitely didn't do anything wrong. But have you tried apologizing to him? Maybe if you tell him you're sorry for scaring him, and you promise not to do it again if doesn't bite you, he'll be open to trying again.

Honestly, that may have been his way of weaning. Obviously the biting is not ok, but It's possible he was already done and that's why he was biting instead of nursing.
So you may not have caused his weaning, his weaning may have caused the biting.
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notjstanothrmom
by on May. 29, 2013 at 6:35 PM
Just sending hugs.
tabi_cat1023
by Tabi - Admin on May. 29, 2013 at 6:38 PM



Quoting jellyphish:

Well, you definitely didn't do anything wrong. But have you tried apologizing to him? Maybe if you tell him you're sorry for scaring him, and you promise not to do it again if doesn't bite you, he'll be open to trying again. I have tried he doesnt seem phased lol

Honestly, that may have been his way of weaning. Obviously the biting is not ok, but It's possible he was already done and that's why he was biting instead of nursing. he had JUST latched on, he was trying to move around to get comfy in the bed lol
So you may not have caused his weaning, his weaning may have caused the biting.maybe but its ratehr sudden since he nursed fie the night before



tabi_cat1023
by Tabi - Admin on May. 29, 2013 at 6:42 PM

Thank you


Quoting notjstanothrmom:

Just sending hugs.



jellyphish
by Platinum Member on May. 29, 2013 at 6:43 PM
It always seems sudden I bet. The last two times my first nursed she didn't seem to know what to do, it was really strange because she had just nursed not that long ago. Add in the fact that you're pregnant and your milk is changing and is even colostrum now, and I'd guess it was going to happen anyway.
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HunnyBabie
by Member on May. 29, 2013 at 6:51 PM
I understand wanting him to self-wean. I wanted my last nursling to self-wean too, but I had to wean all my kids. I know it's breaking ur heart , especially if he never nurses again, but asking for boobies and being comforted by being with you/them is a good sign.
We're moms who nurse, we always want them to nurse one more time no matter HOW their last session goes. Yes, ur last session w/ him is particularly heartbreaking, but if he weren't ready to stop nursing, he would nurse again. If he's not nursing, he's ready to not be nursing anymore.
I'm sorry to hear that ur last session was like that.
tabi_cat1023
by Tabi - Admin on May. 29, 2013 at 6:53 PM


My milk had totally dried up and that cut him back to 3 times a week MAYBE, but once colostrum came in he was happy and told me thank you and begged to nurse, even started nursing to sleep again.  My last oe nursed all the way through pregnancy and gradually cut back.  It didnt feel sudden at all...

Quoting jellyphish:

It always seems sudden I bet. The last two times my first nursed she didn't seem to know what to do, it was really strange because she had just nursed not that long ago. Add in the fact that you're pregnant and your milk is changing and is even colostrum now, and I'd guess it was going to happen anyway.



tabi_cat1023
by Tabi - Admin on May. 29, 2013 at 6:55 PM

My last nursing with my last nursling was wonderful and I just hate that this has been negative...with my last one he nursed then said he was done and no more ad never nursed again, and i was cool with that.  We were both at peace with how things ended, but it just feels like I wronged him.


Quoting HunnyBabie:

I understand wanting him to self-wean. I wanted my last nursling to self-wean too, but I had to wean all my kids. I know it's breaking ur heart , especially if he never nurses again, but asking for boobies and being comforted by being with you/them is a good sign.
We're moms who nurse, we always want them to nurse one more time no matter HOW their last session goes. Yes, ur last session w/ him is particularly heartbreaking, but if he weren't ready to stop nursing, he would nurse again. If he's not nursing, he's ready to not be nursing anymore.
I'm sorry to hear that ur last session was like that.



hapababies
by Silver Member on May. 29, 2013 at 6:58 PM
"The last two times my first nursed she didn't seem to know what to do, it was really strange because she had just nursed not that long ago"


That's exactly how ds1 weaned. It was the strangest thing, it was as if he had forgotten how to nurse even though he had done it several times a day for 13 months. I was pregnant, so I figured my milk had changed flavor or consistency, but he couldn't figure out how to latch. It was a relief to stop nursing because it hurt, but it was a relief at the same time. I didn't expect it to end so suddenly and awkwardly.


Quoting jellyphish:

It always seems sudden I bet. The last two times my first nursed she didn't seem to know what to do, it was really strange because she had just nursed not that long ago. Add in the fact that you're pregnant and your milk is changing and is even colostrum now, and I'd guess it was going to happen anyway.

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bad_mama2011
by on May. 29, 2013 at 7:04 PM

I understand you not wanting that to be his last memory of nursing, but after biting you 4 times maybe that was really his way of telling you he doesn't want to nurse anymore? My son hasn't nursed for several months, but he still likes to lay his head on my chest for comfort.

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