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Behavior modification chart -PIOG

Posted by on Aug. 26, 2013 at 6:47 PM
  • 15 Replies
My 7 yr old will NOT stop complaining/ whining/ being rude. We have tried all sorts of things over the hard but I'm fed up!

I need ideas for a behavior modification chart JUST for those things. She has a rewards chart for daily things like wearing her glasses we also have a chart for punishment that is for anything (you get 2 warnings than a timeout, on your 3rd time out you are grounded).
I'm looking for something that is just for her complaining/ whining/ being rude. I've tried a rewards chart for it but it failed. I want a punishment chart but I need some ideas!
Visuals would be great!
by on Aug. 26, 2013 at 6:47 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Monkiebut
by on Aug. 26, 2013 at 6:48 PM

Mobile Photo

Our punishment chart
Sarah725
by Group Mod - Sarah on Aug. 26, 2013 at 7:28 PM

 Ugh I need one to!  My 6yr old daughter is ready to go back to school (8 more days).  She so bored that she's whining, rude and complaining all the time.  A chart I think would be nice.

Monkiebut
by on Aug. 26, 2013 at 7:49 PM
I'm thinking something similar to the punishment chart, mainly cause when DH is home we can better monitor her even if we don't always communicate with each other.

I'm thinking as the frequency of behavior increases so does the punishment. Like first offense she does A, second B, ext so that it deters faster than it just being punishment A constantly. Also, letting the child have a say in the punishment (prior to being in trouble) usually helps.


Quoting Sarah725:

 Ugh I need one to!  My 6yr old daughter is ready to go back to school (8 more days).  She so bored that she's whining, rude and complaining all the time.  A chart I think would be nice.


melindabelcher
by mel on Aug. 26, 2013 at 8:52 PM
I wouldn't respond to the whinning. Act as if shes not even talking.
If shes rude or complaining have her repeat her thought in an appropiate manner.
Extra work on her part not yours
Monkiebut
by on Aug. 26, 2013 at 9:09 PM
We have tried that for years but it just keeps getting worse. It's SO irritating.


Quoting melindabelcher:

I wouldn't respond to the whinning. Act as if shes not even talking.

If shes rude or complaining have her repeat her thought in an appropiate manner.

Extra work on her part not yours

GoodyBrook
by Silver Member on Aug. 27, 2013 at 12:12 AM

My mind keeps going back to education courses where it's stressed to reward good behavior rather than punish bad.  Soon, "they" say, the student will choose to behave rather than misbehave if they know that there's something to look forward to...

But I'm not a parent of kiddos the age of yours--yet...

Monkiebut
by on Aug. 27, 2013 at 12:43 AM
We have tried that but our problem us that she does not respond well with positive rewards for these particular issues. Like whining, it needs to be relaced with silence 99% of the time. I can't reward her for not complaining every hour, we tried. It went horribly wrong. She will OBSESS over getting rewards and if she does not (cause she will whine/ complain about said rewards) and thus get upset obout not getting the rewards, or stress over if she will get one.

Each kiddo is different. My other dd always responds to rewards, but she does not have the anxiety my older one has.


Quoting GoodyBrook:

My mind keeps going back to education courses where it's stressed to reward good behavior rather than punish bad.  Soon, "they" say, the student will choose to behave rather than misbehave if they know that there's something to look forward to...


But I'm not a parent of kiddos the age of yours--yet...


monalisasus
by Bronze Member on Aug. 27, 2013 at 10:10 AM

if she was younger I would say ignore the whining and reward when she is sweet, but she is seven so can very much understand  not to whine. Perhaps there is a video she can watch of how it makes others feel or if you mirror her behavior to her for a day? I tend to just mirror my daughter whining (not mocking) and ask her how it makes her feel. she usually thinks its so silly. I also just tell her I cant understand her if she is whining and I ask her to repeat it to me in a normal tone. I try my best to not be rude to my daughter and stay respectful so she doesnt learn it more as well (shes almost three) I say please and thanks yous to her. If we go to the Zoo I say thank you for coming to the zoo with me I had fun. or if she did really well in the grocery store...thank you for helping me in the store. encouragement is always better than praise. 

tabi_cat1023
by Group Mod - Tabitha on Aug. 27, 2013 at 10:35 AM

OH man I hate whining, my 6 year old is the worst...if you find something that works let me know!!

jconney80
by Group Mod on Aug. 27, 2013 at 6:20 PM
1 mom liked this

If she isn't responding to rewards I think you should look into some ABA therapy styles. Applied Behavior Analysis. Basically you need something she can see right away. I've seen a lot of kids respond better to that and I'm trying it with my kids. My oldest does not respond to rewards or punishments. She needs something so immediate that she can see. I know you can look up ABA token charts and see how they work. Basically you do activities with them and give them a token on their chart for each task they complete then you reward them after they have so many. So you could try to modify it how you need it. 

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