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Natural Birth & Parenting Natural Birth & Parenting

*UPDATE (went and visited with the dad) Friend had an unexpected unassisted at home VBAC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by on Sep. 13, 2013 at 12:47 AM
  • 33 Replies

Ok so slight back history, she had twin boys 6.5 years ago preterm (not sure how early) via csection with her now ex-husband. Well so the story everyone is being told is that she didnt know she was even pregnancy untill she had the baby at her boyfriends home at a little before 4am Monday morning and the doctors estimate the almost 8 pounds baby boy was around 37 or 38 weeks gestation! She is saying she never knew she was pregnant (which everyone thinks she actually knew and was trying to trap her boyfriend due to her ex not sticking with her and her new bf not being the type to leave a child but was starting to tell people he was thinking they wouldnt be together much longer), her boyfriend who is a good friend of my fiance's called him scared as hell that morning and we can tell from his reaction that he never knew she was pregnant. They had been at our new house earlier that afternoon helping us moving in furniture and she was fine, didnt show signs of labor or really being pregnant other then a slightly larger tummy then I remember. They went to dinner with a friend and then went home. She went to bed with slight side pains and then woke up and apparently pushed the baby out pretty damn quickly because he was born before she was able to wake up her boyfriend. They obviously called 911 and she was rushed to the hospital where she delivered the placenta. She had some tearing which they wanted to keep her for for 48 hours to monitor it and her. Baby is completely healthy. 

The thing is her dad is kicking her out now (she was helping to care for her mother who passed a couple weeks ago) and moving in with her bf. Currently they have a friend on baby duty till they get things figured out...but i have a bad feeling he will be stuck with the little boy for longer then planned becaue the mother is prone to bad depression and habits and never took care or takes care of her twins. Im just surprised, confused and unsure now...just needed to tell it to someone...


9/14: my fiance talked to the babies dad last night and he is kinda in full panic mode lol apparently the friend is staying with him and caring for the baby most of the time while dad works. The mom doesnt sound to be much help as we figured since she handed her other two over to her parents when they were babies without her ex knowing till it was too late. She freaked her boyfriend out in the hospital cause she was crying over everything. We warned him this could last for a few months or longer and told him what to watch for with PPD and that we are only a call away and if he needs either of us or needs anything dont hesitate to call us. 

9/14  #2: So we decided to go visit the dad of the baby, he has HAD that baby at his house since the baby came home. He is doing 99% of the care for his baby, the mother is trying to divide her time between her dad because her mom just passed away, her twin 6 year olds and the new baby but seems to be doing as much care for the baby as she can when she is there but she told me she is scared that she is going to have PPD so we talked to the dad and I talked to her since Ive had PPD before and the guy that we were told was caring for the baby is living in the same house but he sleeps all day and night, he slept the entire time we were there. The house was a deasater when we got there since no one helps the dad clean the house so everything is falling on his shoulders, we are going back there tomorrow to help clean the house (mainly were she had the baby at on the floor which isnt that bad). I also informed him that if his son has a dairy allergy like their pediatrician thinks that the gentle formula he is on is a no go and so is soy. I told him what signs to look for and if he sees them I will help him find something else (mom wont breastfeed or pump). Oh and we had a little drama happen when we were there as in a so called friend texted the dad and told him that if he didnt give custody of the baby to the friend staying there she was calling CPS!!!!!!!!!!!  Also the guy staying there, his gf called the dads mom and said he was giving up the baby!!!!! OMG Im so glad I was holding the baby at that time because I have never seen the dad get so pissed, they went into another room and we could hear them talking, thats not something you do to a new dad that had no idea he was going to be a dad. When we left things seemed to have calmed down and maybe be over with for now. Im now looking up the laws in our state for the info on CPS and custody laws which I know most of anyway. I just hope no drama tomorrow and I can get my baby fix again of a week old baby. 

by on Sep. 13, 2013 at 12:47 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Precious333
by Gold Member on Sep. 13, 2013 at 12:49 AM
Wow....Im speechless.
Nicolle_09
by Silver Member on Sep. 13, 2013 at 12:51 AM

Imagine how i felt when he called us

Quoting Precious333:

Wow....Im speechless.


larissalarie
by on Sep. 13, 2013 at 1:31 AM
If you wanted to "trap" your boyfriend with a pregnancy, why would you hide it and pretend you didn't know? That is completely illogical.
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nikzup03
by on Sep. 13, 2013 at 9:13 AM

this is not your normal story! trapping your boyfriend like that is just crazy! and why would the dad kick her out, that is just awful too! sheesh. what a crazy situation.

alkakfnxcpoem
by Member on Sep. 13, 2013 at 10:27 AM

...Is she bipolar? I don't mean to offend or anything, but the being pregnant but pretending she doesn't know is a sort of manic thing to do. Plus the bouts of depression you mentioned...And my cousin was bipolar and she had troubles committing to taking care of her daughter too. Obviously there's nothing wrong with mental health issues, but getting on some meds might help her out a lot! 

But congrats to her. Plus now she could be on the show "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant," which is my guilty pleasure trashy reality-like show. 

melindabelcher
by on Sep. 13, 2013 at 10:35 AM
That's crazy!
VintageWife
by on Sep. 13, 2013 at 11:11 AM
1 mom liked this

I'm so confused!

*She had the baby but didn't want him to know about the pregnancy in case he left her during it.

*She lived with her dad to take care of her mom that passed away.

*Noone could tell she was pregnant at all.

*There are twins with an ex that may not live with her.

*She's moving in with the bf but someone else has the baby.

 

Did I get that all right?!?

SaratheV
by on Sep. 13, 2013 at 12:46 PM

None of this makes sense. 

LaideBug
by Bronze Member on Sep. 13, 2013 at 12:52 PM
All of this. This is one sad situation.


Quoting VintageWife:

I'm so confused!


*She had the baby but didn't want him to know about the pregnancy in case he left her during it.


*She lived with her dad to take care of her mom that passed away.


*Noone could tell she was pregnant at all.


*There are twins with an ex that may not live with her.


*She's moving in with the bf but someone else has the baby.


 


Did I get that all right?!?


GoodyBrook
by on Sep. 13, 2013 at 1:26 PM
1 mom liked this

I tend to believe her that she didn't know she was pregnant.

Any mama who has had only a prior c-section is essentially a birthing-newbie.  Though we've been through pregnancy, we've not been through a natural birth.  And a natural birth after a c-section typically requires a lot of mental preparedness and dedication to the process.

The whole story sounds a bit odd, but I tend to believe that she was ignorant of her condition. 

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