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Natural Birth & Parenting Natural Birth & Parenting

Why does parenting this way have to be so damn difficult?

Posted by on Oct. 22, 2013 at 4:37 PM
  • 44 Replies
1 mom liked this
I'm sorry, but can I vent for a minute? I don't understand why natural parenting has to be so hard. And it's not the steps or the techniques or the lifestyle but the fact that I can't get anyone else to get on board with me. I am the only person who uses the dang cloth diapers for the baby, and now I just found out that my mother-in-law (The primary caregiver while I am at work ) has been giving him formula! And she's threatening to continue doing so. I just don't understand why no one else can see the benefit (or the harm) but me. Am I a minority? Am I crazy for wanting things to be this way?
by on Oct. 22, 2013 at 4:37 PM
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Replies (1-10):
nikzup03
by on Oct. 22, 2013 at 5:54 PM
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I would be so super beyond pissed about the formula!! Spending all that time to pump! Ugh. Sorry no one is being supportive. That sucks.
I wish I had some advice. :(
polkaspots
by Bronze Member on Oct. 22, 2013 at 6:46 PM
1 mom liked this
I would have punched her in the face.
You're not crazy, but I can't think of anything you can do about what other people do while you're not there. Is there someone else who could watch your little one?
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conejoazul
by Bronze Member on Oct. 22, 2013 at 7:09 PM
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This is just me, but this lifestyle does take more daily effort than the convenience products route ... and some people simply don't want to commit to that added effort. I am sorry to read your MIL is not supporting your choices, that is tough. My MIL and I have butted heads. a few times, but she eventually comes around as a rule.
MaryJarrett
by Silver Member on Oct. 22, 2013 at 7:14 PM
5 moms liked this
I would seek a caregiver who can follow your wishes.
jconney80
by Group Mod on Oct. 22, 2013 at 10:27 PM
1 mom liked this

I'm really sorry that your MIL is giving your child formula! I would be FURIOUS! It is really hard for others to understand on the outside. Try to get into some local natural parenting groups so you don't feel alone. I felt so much better and much more validated when I had others to relate to who cared about the same things. ((hugs))

justone_jen
by Bronze Member on Oct. 22, 2013 at 10:39 PM

I'd be finding new childcare.

"She's threatening to continue doing so." What'd she say?

artsymomma3
by Member on Oct. 23, 2013 at 6:09 AM

She said if I don't come home immediately after work (sometimes I'll run an errand or get groceries), she's going to keep giving him formula because she doesn't want him to cry.  He seems to fall into all of Dr. Sears' categories of a "high needs" baby, and sometimes he just honestly gets fussy.  She freaks out if there's so much as a peep out of him.  It's just a tough situation becuase she quit her job to be his caregiver most days while I'm at work.  If it were a situation where I was paying her I'd definitely have found another option.  Although his health and avoiding formula are definitely worth me paying for better care as far as I'm concerned. 


One small win, I think I got my husband to try using the cloth diapers (but it took threatening to keep no disposables in the house).

JoJoBean8
by Group Mod on Oct. 23, 2013 at 10:53 AM
1 mom liked this

That would be the last time MIL watched my child

Analugojana
by on Oct. 23, 2013 at 11:02 AM
Same here. She would lose all child care privileges. Formula is my one no no though, well ahead of cloth diapers.

Quoting JoJoBean8:

That would be the last time MIL watched my child

artsymomma3
by Member on Oct. 23, 2013 at 11:24 AM
You're right. Perhaps I'm too lenient. It's just that it's my husband's family and I don't want to be the one who messes everything up. I think grudges would be held. I contacted a daycare in the area and am waiting to hear back. I guess this morning she rushed in and left quickly but mentioned something to my husband to the effect of 'You guys with all your new rules are stupid. You survived didn't you?' A lot of difficult decisions will be made and talks will have to be had. It's crazy I've had a lot of passions but born as strong as what I want and see as best for my child.
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