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Natural Birth & Parenting Natural Birth & Parenting

My daughter is jealous of her new brother and sisters breastfeeding?

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I have 3 month old triplets and 2 and 4 year old girls. I've been strictly breastfeeding the babies, like I did with my older two. It was so difficult at first but I'm finally getting the hang of it.

My 2 year old wasn't completely weaned off breastmilk until she was 16 months (really late, I know), so it hasn't been too long since my breasts were her territory. She started pulling my shirt down and climbing all over me when I nurse the babies. I've been letting her nurse occasionally for a comfort (mostly at night when she would get her bottle). 

My mother-in-law got wind of this and thinks it's perverted and innapropriate. My husband isn't sure how he feels about it, but he's more worried my 4 year old will start to want to breastfeed. So far she has not expressed any interest, but even if she wanted to breastfeed occasionally as well, I wouldn't think it was the worst thing in the world.

What do you think? Should I stop this? I produce a lot of milk, so that isn't really an issue. It's what is healthy for my daughter.

by on Feb. 15, 2014 at 12:32 PM
Replies (41-50):
polkaspots
by Bronze Member on Feb. 19, 2014 at 9:04 PM
16 months is early for weaning, almost all babies who stop breastfeeding on their own do it between three and five. It's none of your mils business and there's nothing wrong with nursing your children when they ask for it. I'm nursing a two year old as well. But not triplets. That sounds like hard work.
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Liz132
by Member on Feb. 19, 2014 at 9:26 PM

 Are you being sarcastic about 16 months being late for weaning? If not you should know that WHO recommends nursing a minimum of 2 years, it's perfectlynatural and healthy to nurse a 2 year old or beyond. Wow nursing four at once that's amazing! Keep up the great work! If you don't want to keep nursing your two  year old by all means stop but if it's working for you, great no reason to stop. Don't worry about your mil it's not really her business anyway.

coronado25
by on Feb. 20, 2014 at 1:41 AM
I personally, if it were me, and it is not me, would want my little girl to keep moving forward and not revert to nursing again. I think mil has her reasons for thinking that returning an already weaned child to the breast is not going to be in everybody's best interest.

But I had two children 5 years apart. I am in no place to crown this mother's situation with my own ideas of what is best.

If there were not a question in her mind, I don't think she would have posted here looking for opinions. I gave her mine.

It is not a judgement, or a criticism and I do not speak from experience of nursing triplets. Gosh, triplets! Wow. How awesome/scary is that, right?

So, my opinion being that reverting a weaned child to nursing again would not be a great thing, I expressed what I thought might be other nice ways of bonding that may encourage her jealous little one to be happy that she has successfully graduated from the breast and has a whole new world of foods and beverages to explore.

If mother decides to put her little girl back on the breast, superfine. No big deal in the longrun I am sure. But I understand the mil's hesitance at condoning any behavior that rewards jealousy.

Quoting polkaspots: She did, but the mom is okay with her nursing. It's the mil that has a problem with it.



Quoting coronado25: I was under the impression that the daughter had already been weaned and now wants to resume nursing.





Quoting mjrex87:

OP indicated she wants to allow her daughter to nurse, but these would be great suggestions for someone who wanted to wean.

Quoting coronado25: I would help your daughter relish the fact that her body is now capable of digesting big kid foods, that the time for nursing is special for babies and does not last very long, and that she has had her special baby time already. Help her find other ways of bonding with you that may be only youu two do. Like a sippy cup of her favorite beverage or let her munch a favorite snack while you rub her feet or braid her hair. Let her feel pride in graduating to eating and drinking in a way that requires hand eye coordination, and some basic skills like manners and thoughtfulness about healthy foods. Explain that you, too enjoyed your nursing time together and now there will be different special times to look forward to.


AlwaysKISA
by Member on Feb. 20, 2014 at 1:42 AM
1 mom liked this
Damn. You are superwoman, seriously.
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polkaspots
by Bronze Member on Feb. 20, 2014 at 6:56 AM
I see it differently. I don't see nursing as reverting or rewarding jealousy. It's something the child wants to do and probably would still be doing if she hadn't gotten pregnant.
The main aspect is that it really doesn't matter why the mil doesn't agree with it. They're not her breasts or children.


Quoting coronado25: I personally, if it were me, and it is not me, would want my little girl to keep moving forward and not revert to nursing again. I think mil has her reasons for thinking that returning an already weaned child to the breast is not going to be in everybody's best interest.



But I had two children 5 years apart. I am in no place to crown this mother's situation with my own ideas of what is best.



If there were not a question in her mind, I don't think she would have posted here looking for opinions. I gave her mine.



It is not a judgement, or a criticism and I do not speak from experience of nursing triplets. Gosh, triplets! Wow. How awesome/scary is that, right?



So, my opinion being that reverting a weaned child to nursing again would not be a great thing, I expressed what I thought might be other nice ways of bonding that may encourage her jealous little one to be happy that she has successfully graduated from the breast and has a whole new world of foods and beverages to explore.



If mother decides to put her little girl back on the breast, superfine. No big deal in the longrun I am sure. But I understand the mil's hesitance at condoning any behavior that rewards jealousy.



Quoting polkaspots: She did, but the mom is okay with her nursing. It's the mil that has a problem with it.





Quoting coronado25: I was under the impression that the daughter had already been weaned and now wants to resume nursing.







Quoting mjrex87:

OP indicated she wants to allow her daughter to nurse, but these would be great suggestions for someone who wanted to wean.

Quoting coronado25: I would help your daughter relish the fact that her body is now capable of digesting big kid foods, that the time for nursing is special for babies and does not last very long, and that she has had her special baby time already. Help her find other ways of bonding with you that may be only youu two do. Like a sippy cup of her favorite beverage or let her munch a favorite snack while you rub her feet or braid her hair. Let her feel pride in graduating to eating and drinking in a way that requires hand eye coordination, and some basic skills like manners and thoughtfulness about healthy foods. Explain that you, too enjoyed your nursing time together and now there will be different special times to look forward to.


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Sarah725
by Group Mod - Sarah on Feb. 20, 2014 at 3:24 PM

How are you doing handling the triplets with your other children?  Getting any sleep?

MilfordMomma
by on Feb. 21, 2014 at 11:02 AM

I'm finally start to get the hang of things. Surprisingly the babies are sleeping better than either of my oldest have ever slept. I put them on a strict schedule and I think I've gotten it down to a science. So while I'm not getting my 8 hours for sure, it isn't as terrible as it sounds. 

The struggle is the balance of the older girls with the babies. We do have help, so sometimes I let them take over with the babies so I can get some alone time with the girls. Actually the other day my oldest and I went to get manicures (yes, I took my 4 year old to get a manicure) and out to lunch. She was in her glory. 

I signed up for mommy-and-me infant swimming and mommy-and-me infant music and movement classes. It's something different we do while my oldest are at school. It gets me out of the house and keeps me sane!

Quoting Sarah725:

How are you doing handling the triplets with your other children?  Getting any sleep?



Sarah725
by Group Mod - Sarah on Feb. 21, 2014 at 11:19 AM
Quoting MilfordMomma:

I'm finally start to get the hang of things. Surprisingly the babies are sleeping better than either of my oldest have ever slept. I put them on a strict schedule and I think I've gotten it down to a science. So while I'm not getting my 8 hours for sure, it isn't as terrible as it sounds. 

The struggle is the balance of the older girls with the babies. We do have help, so sometimes I let them take over with the babies so I can get some alone time with the girls. Actually the other day my oldest and I went to get manicures (yes, I took my 4 year old to get a manicure) and out to lunch. She was in her glory. 

I signed up for mommy-and-me infant swimming and mommy-and-me infant music and movement classes. It's something different we do while my oldest are at school. It gets me out of the house and keeps me sane!

Quoting Sarah725:

How are you doing handling the triplets with your other children?  Getting any sleep?


You are amazing!!
tabi_cat1023
by Group Mod - Tabitha on Feb. 21, 2014 at 11:45 AM

hmm my 3 year 9 month old still breastfeeds once every other day or so, its not in any way an issue for a child to nurse as long as they are capable

tabi_cat1023
by Group Mod - Tabitha on Feb. 21, 2014 at 11:46 AM

I would be locked up in my hole going nuts lol, you are doing awesome

Quoting MilfordMomma:

I'm finally start to get the hang of things. Surprisingly the babies are sleeping better than either of my oldest have ever slept. I put them on a strict schedule and I think I've gotten it down to a science. So while I'm not getting my 8 hours for sure, it isn't as terrible as it sounds. 

The struggle is the balance of the older girls with the babies. We do have help, so sometimes I let them take over with the babies so I can get some alone time with the girls. Actually the other day my oldest and I went to get manicures (yes, I took my 4 year old to get a manicure) and out to lunch. She was in her glory. 

I signed up for mommy-and-me infant swimming and mommy-and-me infant music and movement classes. It's something different we do while my oldest are at school. It gets me out of the house and keeps me sane!

Quoting Sarah725:

How are you doing handling the triplets with your other children?  Getting any sleep?




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