Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Natural Birth & Parenting Natural Birth & Parenting

i feel like a failure

Posted by on Jul. 13, 2014 at 8:06 AM
  • 13 Replies

 my yds is almost 17months old, and i am 12 weeks pregnant. i have had hyperemesis since 6 weeks and had to be admitted to the hospital for 4 days. i can eat a little bit now but not a lot. my youngest ds was nursing every 3-4 hrs and all night before the hyperemesis kicked in. since then he wants to nurse ALL the time but never seems satisfied. he doesntreally eat a lot of solids but has slowly started eating more. all night he wasnt to nurse but is switching sides every 5 mins and acts like he isnt getting anything. I think i am drying up, and he isnt ready to stop. i feel like i am failing my son. does anyone have advice?every time he cries while nursing feels like a stab through my heart.

by on Jul. 13, 2014 at 8:06 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
booaura
by Member on Jul. 13, 2014 at 8:09 AM
Hugs! It's hard. I'm 18 weeks with twins, nursing my 2 year old and 5 month old, and was in the hospital for three weeks because of hg and a few other issues. I've been producing a lot though, so I've been pumping. I've always pumped to help with supply and to have extra on hand in case I ever needed it. Have you tried pumping to help with supply? Or fenugreek, mother's milk tea, etc?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
rmgriffberg
by Bronze Member on Jul. 13, 2014 at 8:13 AM

 i have never been able to pump much (like 2oz if engorged, 1 if not) im not getting anything while pumping. i have tried oatmeal, no change and tea makes me sick

Quoting booaura: Hugs! It's hard. I'm 18 weeks with twins, nursing my 2 year old and 5 month old, and was in the hospital for three weeks because of hg and a few other issues. I've been producing a lot though, so I've been pumping. I've always pumped to help with supply and to have extra on hand in case I ever needed it. Have you tried pumping to help with supply? Or fenugreek, mother's milk tea, etc?

 

larissalarie
by on Jul. 13, 2014 at 11:46 AM
2 moms liked this
Fenugreek is NOT safe when pregnant OP!

Most women lose supply when they're pregnant, hypermesis or not. It's due to the hormones needed to have a healthy pregnancy, so not something you really want to fight anyway. This is also why it's important to think about your breastfeeding goals when planning the timing of the next pregnancy (although I realize many times these things aren't planned LOL)

Anyway, surely you know there's nothing to feel guilty about here. Your son will adjust as needed, kids are awesome that way :-)


Quoting booaura: Hugs! It's hard. I'm 18 weeks with twins, nursing my 2 year old and 5 month old, and was in the hospital for three weeks because of hg and a few other issues. I've been producing a lot though, so I've been pumping. I've always pumped to help with supply and to have extra on hand in case I ever needed it. Have you tried pumping to help with supply? Or fenugreek, mother's milk tea, etc?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
MaryJarrett
by Silver Member on Jul. 13, 2014 at 11:48 AM
Fenugreek is not pregnancy safe. There are only a few galactogogues that are.

Quoting booaura: Hugs! It's hard. I'm 18 weeks with twins, nursing my 2 year old and 5 month old, and was in the hospital for three weeks because of hg and a few other issues. I've been producing a lot though, so I've been pumping. I've always pumped to help with supply and to have extra on hand in case I ever needed it. Have you tried pumping to help with supply? Or fenugreek, mother's milk tea, etc?
booaura
by Member on Jul. 13, 2014 at 11:49 AM
Huh, I didn't know that. I've never done much research to bolster supply, just read about it in passing. Thanks for correcting me! Do you know what the side effects of it are, why it isn't safe in pregnancy?

Quoting larissalarie: Fenugreek is NOT safe when pregnant OP!

Most women lose supply when they're pregnant, hypermesis or not. It's due to the hormones needed to have a healthy pregnancy, so not something you really want to fight anyway. This is also why it's important to think about your breastfeeding goals when planning the timing of the next pregnancy (although I realize many times these things aren't planned LOL)

Anyway, surely you know there's nothing to feel guilty about here. Your son will adjust as needed, kids are awesome that way :-)


Quoting booaura: Hugs! It's hard. I'm 18 weeks with twins, nursing my 2 year old and 5 month old, and was in the hospital for three weeks because of hg and a few other issues. I've been producing a lot though, so I've been pumping. I've always pumped to help with supply and to have extra on hand in case I ever needed it. Have you tried pumping to help with supply? Or fenugreek, mother's milk tea, etc?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
ceckyl
by Bronze Member on Jul. 13, 2014 at 12:00 PM
2 moms liked this

It's a uterine stimulant, so miscarriage or early labour. 

Quoting booaura: Huh, I didn't know that. I've never done much research to bolster supply, just read about it in passing. Thanks for correcting me! Do you know what the side effects of it are, why it isn't safe in pregnancy?
Quoting larissalarie: Fenugreek is NOT safe when pregnant OP! Most women lose supply when they're pregnant, hypermesis or not. It's due to the hormones needed to have a healthy pregnancy, so not something you really want to fight anyway. This is also why it's important to think about your breastfeeding goals when planning the timing of the next pregnancy (although I realize many times these things aren't planned LOL) Anyway, surely you know there's nothing to feel guilty about here. Your son will adjust as needed, kids are awesome that way :-)
Quoting booaura: Hugs! It's hard. I'm 18 weeks with twins, nursing my 2 year old and 5 month old, and was in the hospital for three weeks because of hg and a few other issues. I've been producing a lot though, so I've been pumping. I've always pumped to help with supply and to have extra on hand in case I ever needed it. Have you tried pumping to help with supply? Or fenugreek, mother's milk tea, etc?


rmgriffberg
by Bronze Member on Jul. 13, 2014 at 12:03 PM

 my head knows there is nothing to feel guilty about, but my heart does not. i know he can eat food, he just isnt a big fan of solids so i worry that he is not getting enough food. i guess i will just keep trying more food and keep telling myself i have not failed him.

Quoting larissalarie: Fenugreek is NOT safe when pregnant OP! Most women lose supply when they're pregnant, hypermesis or not. It's due to the hormones needed to have a healthy pregnancy, so not something you really want to fight anyway. This is also why it's important to think about your breastfeeding goals when planning the timing of the next pregnancy (although I realize many times these things aren't planned LOL) Anyway, surely you know there's nothing to feel guilty about here. Your son will adjust as needed, kids are awesome that way :-)
Quoting booaura: Hugs! It's hard. I'm 18 weeks with twins, nursing my 2 year old and 5 month old, and was in the hospital for three weeks because of hg and a few other issues. I've been producing a lot though, so I've been pumping. I've always pumped to help with supply and to have extra on hand in case I ever needed it. Have you tried pumping to help with supply? Or fenugreek, mother's milk tea, etc?

 

larissalarie
by on Jul. 13, 2014 at 12:06 PM
1 mom liked this
Looks like ceckyl already answered!

Quoting booaura: Huh, I didn't know that. I've never done much research to bolster supply, just read about it in passing. Thanks for correcting me! Do you know what the side effects of it are, why it isn't safe in pregnancy?

Quoting larissalarie: Fenugreek is NOT safe when pregnant OP!

Most women lose supply when they're pregnant, hypermesis or not. It's due to the hormones needed to have a healthy pregnancy, so not something you really want to fight anyway. This is also why it's important to think about your breastfeeding goals when planning the timing of the next pregnancy (although I realize many times these things aren't planned LOL)

Anyway, surely you know there's nothing to feel guilty about here. Your son will adjust as needed, kids are awesome that way :-)


Quoting booaura: Hugs! It's hard. I'm 18 weeks with twins, nursing my 2 year old and 5 month old, and was in the hospital for three weeks because of hg and a few other issues. I've been producing a lot though, so I've been pumping. I've always pumped to help with supply and to have extra on hand in case I ever needed it. Have you tried pumping to help with supply? Or fenugreek, mother's milk tea, etc?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
larissalarie
by on Jul. 13, 2014 at 12:07 PM
(((Hugs))) he'll adjust his solid intake as it becomes necessary mama.

Quoting rmgriffberg:

 my head knows there is nothing to feel guilty about, but my heart does not. i know he can eat food, he just isnt a big fan of solids so i worry that he is not getting enough food. i guess i will just keep trying more food and keep telling myself i have not failed him.


Quoting larissalarie: Fenugreek is NOT safe when pregnant OP! Most women lose supply when they're pregnant, hypermesis or not. It's due to the hormones needed to have a healthy pregnancy, so not something you really want to fight anyway. This is also why it's important to think about your breastfeeding goals when planning the timing of the next pregnancy (although I realize many times these things aren't planned LOL) Anyway, surely you know there's nothing to feel guilty about here. Your son will adjust as needed, kids are awesome that way :-)
Quoting booaura: Hugs! It's hard. I'm 18 weeks with twins, nursing my 2 year old and 5 month old, and was in the hospital for three weeks because of hg and a few other issues. I've been producing a lot though, so I've been pumping. I've always pumped to help with supply and to have extra on hand in case I ever needed it. Have you tried pumping to help with supply? Or fenugreek, mother's milk tea, etc?

 

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
MamaBearEH
by Member on Jul. 13, 2014 at 2:49 PM
Have you tried hand expressing? Some mothers who don't respond well to pumping have better luck this way.
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)