Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Labor questions

Posted by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 10:28 PM
  • 5 Replies

Hello Im new here. Im so glad to have found a group like this. I am now 30 weeks pregnant. I would love very much to have a natural birth. I personally HATE hospitals and would rather have my baby at home. With my first I did have a midwife and went to a smaller hospital. My midwife never really said anything to me. Then around 5 centimetersI was in the tub and they came in and said....."if you think you might want medication you should get it now because hes leaving for the day. If not it could take several hours for him to come back and get it set up for you." Well they knew I was going all natural from the time I came into the hospital. Well basically it got into my head and started to mess with me. I started to get really worried and stressed out. So I told them I wanted a Epi. Well he did it wrong and pocked my spinal fluide. So I felt all of my labor but I wasn't able to leave the bed at all. Worse things happened after the baby was born and I was home. Then I had to be rushed into the emergency. All because of the epi!!! Well now Im really scared that I will be in my zone and they will say something to stress me out again! I feel like if I was in a much more relaxed environment I would feel much better and be able to do it on my own. I just dont feel comfortable doing it in the hospital! There are no birthing centers in my area. There is one in my state but its more then a hour away. Also my husband will not pay for a doula=(. So I guess what Im asking is....What should I do to prepare? What books should I buy. I dont even know where to start!!

by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 10:28 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-5):
doulala
by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 10:40 PM

Welcome, mama!     I think it's awfully frustrating to go through that, especially when you had other intentions.   But I am glad you're here!   Where are you located?  You are looking for a homebirth midwife?

Reading books that inform & empower will be very helpful!   You can get them from the library, used through Powell's, or check with La Leche League.   You could start with one of these (or all!):

  • Gentle Birth Choices (also has a DVD!)     ~Harper
  • Birthing From Within      ~England
  • Ina May's Guide To Childbirth     ~Gaskin

I can help more when I get a better feel for your region & resources available there.

;-)





Birth is not only about making babies. Birth is about making mothers ~ strong, competent, capable mothers who trust themselves and know their inner strength.

~Barbara Katz Rothma


When you change the way you view birth, the way you birth will change. -Mongan


doulala
by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 10:56 PM

I mentioned this another mom recently when she had financial concerns about hiring a doula:



If you really want one then it might be worth checking to see who offers a sliding-scale for discounted services. Doulas do not do the job for the money: it's a passion! Every mom who wants a doula should have one, this event is just too important!! Moms only get to bring their baby into the world once and doulas want to help that be the best it can possibly be.

I worked for over a year for free, myself. I kept getting referred from one new mama and then another. They heard I was free and couldn't afford one, otherwise. I said I am no longer certifying, but if this meant they'd have no doula, then I would volunteer!

And lots of doulas set aside a couple of pro-bono services each year because of this. So really, it's worth checking it out. :-) If you find a doula who can't offer a discount then ask her if she knows another doula (or doula-in-training) who will. When they are getting certified, most doulas work for free.

There are also doula programs, too. Like Operation Special Delivery has free doulas for military wives. And some hospitals offer them (maybe through the midwifery practices). We have that here.




Here's some info on how doulas help the dads:

 

http://www.cyndidoula.net/dads.htm

 

http://www.doula.com/dads_and_doulas.shtml

 

http://chysdoulacare.com/resources.html




  • Doulas mother the mother.    :-)
  • Every woman who wants a doula should have one!   :-)
  • If you don't know your options you don't have any.   ~Korte & Scaer
  • If a doula were a drug, it would be unethical not to use it. -John H. Kennell, MD
  • Women's strongest feelings [in terms of their birthings], positive and

    negative, focus on the way they were treated by their caregivers.   ~Annie Kennedy & Penny Simkin
AnaMaria624
by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 11:14 PM

Thank you so much! Your so helpful to me. I am so thankful that I have found someone as nice as you. I have been trying to do this all on my own. I dont know very many people who have had children. Also that would choose to go all natural. I live in the Portland area in Maine.

Quoting doulala:

Welcome, mama!     I think it's awfully frustrating to go through that, especially when you had other intentions.   But I am glad you're here!   Where are you located?  You are looking for a homebirth midwife?

Reading books that inform & empower will be very helpful!   You can get them from the library, used through Powell's, or check with La Leche League.   You could start with one of these (or all!):

  • Gentle Birth Choices (also has a DVD!)     ~Harper
  • Birthing From Within      ~England
  • Ina May's Guide To Childbirth     ~Gaskin

I can help more when I get a better feel for your region & resources available there.

;-)

 

 

 

 


                                **Proud Stay At Home Mommy!** 


preview image
                                    Baby number 2...... Jameson Cole!

doulala
by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 11:58 PM

:-D   You are sweet!!   Thank you!     

in your area:

http://www.opencirclemidwifery.org/


Apple a Day Healthcare for Women
True North Center for Health & Healing
Susan E. Fekety MSN,CNM
202 US Route 1, Suite 200
Falmouth ME 04105
(207) 781-4488
Fax: (207) 781-4470
www.truenorthhealthcenter.org
sfekety@truenorthhealthcenter.org
Services: Post partum, Gyn, Family Planning
Speciality: Woman’s Health Care, Nutrition, Life Counseling




this covers the MW's allover the area (distance from you):

Maine Midwives

Find a Midwife in Maine | Directory of Maine Midwives | Midwifery in Maine List

This site helps you find a midwife, in Maine , for a home, birth center or hospital birth with Direct Entry Midwives(DEM), Certified Nurse Midwives(CNM), Certified Midwives (CM), Certified Professional Midwives(CPM), Licensed Midwives(LM), Registered Midwives (RM) and Lay Midwives.

Midwives in Portland Maine (04103)

The listings of Maine midwives on this site are paid advertising. BirthWithLove and related entities do not screen or endorse any of the midwives from Maine listed in our directory. It is the responsibility of the individual to choose a competent and compatible midwife in Maine






Another mama put this list together:




HOW TO FIND A MIDWIFE 
http://www.midwife.org/find.cfm
http://cfmidwifery.org/find/index.aspx
http://birthpartners.com/
http://www.mana.org/memberlist.html 

Questions to Ask a Midwife

Experience

  1. What is your general philosophy about pregnancy and birth?
  2. Do you let us do whatever we want during labor? (Food, positions, water, etc.)
  3. What is your education and training as a midwife?
  4. How many years have you been practicing?
  5. Are you a mother yourself? How old are your children now?
  6. How were your babies born?
  7. Do you work alone or with a partner or assistant? If you work with someone, what is their experience?
  8. Do you participate in a local midwife peer review group?  How many meetings have you attended in the past year?
  9. How many births have you attended as the primary caregiver?
  10. What is your experience with breech births? How many have you attended?
  11. What is your experience with twins? How many have you attended?
  12. What is your experience with VBACS? How many have you attended?
  13. How do you handle posterior babies?
  14. For hospital midwives, how do you feel about home birth?
    For home birth midwives, how do you feel about unassisted birth?

Prenatal Care

  1. How many births are you attending now? Do you have a maximum, and how do you manage to avoid too many commitments?
  2. If I am planning a home birth, do you come to my home any time before I go into labor? Do you provide supplies or literature to help us prepare?
  3. How often will I see you? What do your checkups consist of?
  4. What are your guidelines concerning weight gain, nutrition, prenatal vitamins, and exercise? What are your standards for pre-eclampsia?
  5. Do you require that I take a childbirth education class? Do you teach such a class?
  6. Who takes over for you if you go on vacation or get sick?
  7. What is your policy for postdates? At what point do you consider a pregnancy postdates? If I reach 42wks will you induce me? If I refuse induction will you risk me out?
  8. What other reasons would you risk a client out (i.e. GD, pre-e, etc)?
  9. What is your policy regarding large babies?
  10. What do you consider a high-risk pregnancy?

Hospital and Obstetrician

  1. Do you attend births in a birthing center, home or hospital?
  2. How do you handle emergencies? Under what circumstances would you transfer?
  3. What is your transfer rate?
  4. Would you stay with me in the hospital?
  5. Do you require that I see a physician during my pregnancy even if everything is all right?
  6. Do you have guidelines or restrictions about who can give birth at home?
  7. Under what circumstances do you induce labor with pitocin?
  8. What is your protocol to induce labor naturally?
  9. What is your c-section rate?
  10. What is your episiotomy rate?

General Labor

  1. What kind of equipment do you bring to a birth?
  2. Are you permitted to administer any drugs during labor?
  3. How many people are allowed to be around?
  4. When should I call you after my labor begins?
  5. Will you allow my partner to be as active at the birth as he desires?
  6. How much time do you allow for the delivery of the placenta?
  7. How soon do you usually clamp/cut the cord after delivery? Can I wait to clamp/cut the cord until *after* the placenta has expelled?
  8. How often have you swept membranes to get labor going? Artificially ruptured membranes (AROM)?
  9. In a typical labor, how often do you do vaginal exams (VE)?
  10. What will you do if I show up to the hospital in active labor and my baby is breech?
  11. Do you use natural methods for treating GBS or require ABx for GBS? Can I refuse antibiotics for GBS or will you risk me out?
  12. What is your policy on prolonged rupture of membranes(PROM)?

Financial Matters

  1. What are your fees and what do they include?
  2. Can you submit your charges to my insurance company?
  3. What payment arrangements do you make?

The Baby

  1. Have you ever had to resuscitate a baby?
  2. Do you regularly bulb suction baby after birth?
  3. Do you examine the baby after birth?
  4. Do you give eyedrops or shots to the baby?
  5. Do you have a pediatrician you work with or recommend?
  6. Will you help me with breastfeeding?
  7. How do you feel about circumcision?
  8. How often do you come to see me after I give birth?
  9. Do you provide or know of anyone who will help new mothers after birth?



We've put birth in the same category with illness and disease and it's never belonged there. Birth is naturally safe, but we've allowed it to be taken over by the medical community.

~Carla Hartley, founder of Trust Birth and the Ancient Art Midwifery Institute

 

Treating normal labors as though they were complicated can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. ~Rooks

 

If you lay down, the baby will never come out! ~ Native American saying

MamaK313
by on Feb. 24, 2009 at 3:56 PM

I had a wonderful natural birth in my local hospital by a doctor. I was mean about a lot of things and just stood my ground about it. My mom and my husband knew what my wishes were and they helped me out so much. When I would start doubting myself, they would coach me on and tell me I could do it. I think it's so much about the support you have in there with you. At least that's what helped me get through. Good luck!

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)