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So has anyone tried counseling?

Posted by on Jul. 27, 2007 at 1:11 AM
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Just curious if anyone has tried counseling to help their marriage and did it work. I am actually going to counseling by myself.

 ~*alisha rose*~

   www.GoVeg.com

by on Jul. 27, 2007 at 1:11 AM
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Replies (1-5):
LiviNtheLifE22
by on Jul. 27, 2007 at 10:06 AM
I want to try counseling as our last resort but money is real tight right now 'cause I'm a sahm and he's just starting up a little business, so he hasn't developed a strong clientelle yet. I even bought the relationship rescue book lol but he either falls asleep or doesn't put his whole heart into it. I'm sick of working out the problems that I didn't cause. If this marriage is going to work he has to meet me half way, and i don't see that happening anytime soon. I honestly think he'll fight for my love and our marriage when i leave, but after that point there's no more chances.....



matthewsmommy44
by on Jul. 27, 2007 at 10:09 AM
I started counseling last week...my full story is too long you can read it on my group if your interested. My group name is Cheated On.


MDMomof2Cuties
by on Jul. 27, 2007 at 11:58 PM
My husband and I started counseling about 5 or 6 months ago.  We took a little break right after I had our second, but quickly started back up again after he walked out.  Anyway, it seemed to be helping.  He would start to do little things for me, like push the stroller when we were out so I could have a break. 

But a few weeks ago it was like he decided to stop trying and we had a horrific few weeks.  He lied to me about when he got off work, told me I was selfish for wanting to stay home with my family, etc.  At our next session I had a break down and said that I wasn't sure if I wanted to keep working on the marriage because I felt as though I was giving and giving and getting nothing in return.  And he just sat there!  I was so mad.  The counselor told us that we had some talking to do and that if we chose divorce, basically good luck, and if we decided we wanted to keep working on it, to call him back. 

I really liked our counselor, it was pricey, and he was just an LCSW.  I have to say that I do think counseling works if both parties are ready and willing to make the effort.  However, you can't change someone else, only yourself.  So if your hubby doesn't give two craps, then you probably won't see much come of it.  I don't know, I'm still pissed and confused!  Sorry I'm rambling!
JDWaite
by on Jul. 21, 2013 at 8:04 PM

Quick background: After years of avoidance and months of soul searching and my own personal counseling I was 99% sure shortly after the 2012 holidays that a genuinely happy marriage (or for either of us to be happy individuals) we needed a divorce.  My husband was devastated and having none of it.  I haven't been to work in ten years, so I knew just leaving wasn't an immediate option (but I didn't want to disrespect him by making some secret exit strategy).  We also have a special needs child, and I knew to coparent properly we would have to have a healthy relationship.  I just couldn't see that being a marriage.

So I agreed to go marriage counseling out of a moral obligation more than anything, but tried to have an open mind.  I still don't know what's going to happen in the end, but it's definitely been worth it.  We still have a long road ahead of us, but we both agreed recently that our relationship is better than it's ever been (as far as communication, respect, genuine friendship, teamwork).

I'm still working on going back to school and other things, so I have the means and tools to be independent if I need to, but I'm sort of glad I wasn't able to physically leave the home or I think it would be over and done by now.

Rocad
by New Member on Sep. 15, 2013 at 1:22 AM

In counseling now, but I don't think my husband hears me or the counselor. I think he feels that since it is a woman,she doesn't get "a man being a man" and having to control things. Anyways, in MC since May. Don't know how things are going to end....

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