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Fears, one child homeschooling

Posted by on Feb. 12, 2013 at 8:11 AM
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Hello Cafemom Ladies !!

     I just started to homeschool my daughter Emily, age 7. We were going to wait until this fall but when I searched curriculum for Math, Emily had quite a bit to catch up on. I decided that if we pulled her from the public school system now, we could get to where she needs to be academically and have her ready for third grade this fall.

     So...here are my issues. Emily has older brothers (high school age), but with the age difference, she is basically being homeschooled as an only child. In the beginning, I was like....we will do fine. God put it on my and my husbands heart to do this, all will fall into place. But this guilt crept in making me doubt that I am  harming her by not having her around other kids and that I am not smart enough to teach effectively. This guilt eats away at me. I feel like I am being attacked, a spiritual attack. Satan and people (family, neighbors) telling me that homeschooling her is a bad parenting choice. We live in a neighborhood of about 200, close together homes. She has a couple of friends in the neighborhood....not christian friends but school friends. She is very social and fun loving. They play a couple times a week....most of the time. She is also involved in a beginner Gymnastics class once a week, which she loves. We are involved in our Church, Emily is in the Sunday school class and a Sunday night Kids Praise class. I contacted our local homeschooling association but have not heard anything back yet. I am at a point where these doubts are fears are overwhelming. We bought a curriculum called Lifepac by Alpha Omega and like it but I read a review and not so sure now. I have talked with friends who home school but they have 4 children and when I bring it up, they say she will be fine....

Please help me with these doubts and thoughts of failing her.

Have a blessed day !

 

 

by on Feb. 12, 2013 at 8:11 AM
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Replies (1-10):
MiriRose923
by on Feb. 12, 2013 at 1:06 PM
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Hi there!  I'm new to this group, but so glad I found it... we all need encouraging support from other homeschooling Christian moms! 

I'm sorry you're feeling so overwhelmed and I can totally relate to where you are at right now... I made the choice to homeschool my daughter when she entered the second grade and experienced many of the same concerns you described.  My daughter is now in the fourth grade and is doing great.  She's been able to connect with other homeschoolers in our extended family and also through a weekly homeshooling group.  I would encourage you to be patient and give yourself and your daughter time to adjust and adapt.  Have you asked your homeschooling friends for some tips and suggestions?  Are you able to get together with them during the week so your daughter can have a little more interaction with other children?

As I read your concerns about failing your daughter, an article from Focus on the Family's website came to mind called Effective Home Schooling.  I work with Focus, and articles like this one were very encouraging to me when we first got started with homeschooling.  :)

I will pray for you!  Your daughter is blessed to have a mom that cares so much and I trust that God will bless you with encouragement and peace of mind. ((Hugs))

Annastacialynn
by Member on Feb. 12, 2013 at 2:51 PM
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 These are normal thoughts and fears. :) I have been homeschooling for 2 years now (so I am still a newbie) :) but I have found that the more we do and the more we try the better it gets. I decided right from the beginning that this is what God had planned for us (after much time and prayer) and that since that was the case I was not going to listen to other people's opinions about how we were raising our kids. From what you described, I think she has a lot of time with other kids! I think you are doing a great job! :)

Prayer is a huge tool against Satan! I just recently went through an attack by Satan, one like I have never experienced, and it was horrible!! I asked for prayer from my sister and I continually called on God through out the day (sometimes minute by minute) and He was faithful! (as He always is) :) He brought me out of the attack stronger in my faith in Him. Keep praying - even if you have to stop every other minute and ask God to guard you from Satan. He will! If you feel that homeschooling is where God has called you to be, then don't listen to Satan and flee to Christ. :)

Hugs to you! It will all be just fine. :)

MiriRose923
by on Feb. 12, 2013 at 3:42 PM
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Quoting Annastacialynn:

 These are normal thoughts and fears. :) I have been homeschooling for 2 years now (so I am still a newbie) :) but I have found that the more we do and the more we try the better it gets. I decided right from the beginning that this is what God had planned for us (after much time and prayer) and that since that was the case I was not going to listen to other people's opinions about how we were raising our kids. From what you described, I think she has a lot of time with other kids! I think you are doing a great job! :)

Prayer is a huge tool against Satan! I just recently went through an attack by Satan, one like I have never experienced, and it was horrible!! I asked for prayer from my sister and I continually called on God through out the day (sometimes minute by minute) and He was faithful! (as He always is) :) He brought me out of the attack stronger in my faith in Him. Keep praying - even if you have to stop every other minute and ask God to guard you from Satan. He will! If you feel that homeschooling is where God has called you to be, then don't listen to Satan and flee to Christ. :)

Hugs to you! It will all be just fine. :)

 This is wonderful advice!  I agree 100%!!

KrissyKC
by Member on Feb. 13, 2013 at 1:58 AM
1 mom liked this

Home education is a journey.   It's not just a class that you take or a school that you go to.   It's leading your kid on a lifetime of learning.

Don't stress about forcing her to "catch up"... or else you are putting the same difficult expectations on her that she had in PS.   Instead, take some time to find how to enjoy learning.  

Discover how she learns best (learning styles)...

find out what you NEED to do to fulfill state laws ((although there are some folks that don't follow their state law because they don't appreciate the state intruding on their homeschooling))

Don't stop trying to get involved with the homeschool group around you.  It's easier to get involved over the summer and into the new year, but don't quit trying.  They are well worth the effort!   At least the one we are in now is.

Field trips rock!!!  Enjoy them...

Explore curriculum.   Life pac is OK.  We used it a little for language arts, but I'll be honest, we didn't like it.  

Visit with other HSing moms and figure out how and why they choose to do what they do... gather ideas from them... but don't feel intimidated by them or like you have to do what they do.

Explore different styles of homeschooling, you can find a variety of styles and theories online.  Read up on them all and don't be afraid to blend ideas.

Above all, have fun.   If you are excited and enjoy it... I guarantee your daughter will too.


TigerofMu
by Member on Feb. 13, 2013 at 7:05 AM
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It sounds like she has lots of opportunities to interact with other people outside of your home, so that should not be a worry. 

Are you worried about the outside "socialization" thing, or the academics?  Because in my experience, the one-on-one quality time that you can give your child is worth more than the most expensive curriculum on the planet.  If it's a struggle, you can work through it together.

I don't have alot of experience with Lifepac, though we have a few that were given to us by a friend. Definitely have no idea about math.  Give it a try, and go through it with her.  Give it some time for you both to settle in, and see how she does.  If it is a good fit, then great!  You know where to go from there.  If it's not a good fit, then ask around, look at some other choices, check out some websites...

MissTrombley
by on Feb. 13, 2013 at 12:47 PM
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Thanks so much Mirirose923 !!

I will check out that link, Focus on the Family is a great resource !! Your words, along with you and your daughters experience has been so refreshing to hear. I am encouraged by your words and so appreciate the time you took to respond to my post =)

 

MissTrombley
by on Feb. 13, 2013 at 1:00 PM
3 moms liked this

Thanks Annastacialynn for your comments !!

You hit the nail right on the head with the attacks. I have only once experienced an attack close to the one I just went through, which was my baptism. Constant lies from the pit that overwhelmed my mind and took a hold  of my thoughts for a few days. You know, Satan was so swift with the arrows....I didn't even recognize it was him, I thought it was my own fears and doubts...which they were but he ran with them. I got no sleep, crying, and worrying. I prayed and prayed for an answer from the Lord on what path to take with our daughter. My answer came, the next morning from my husband. While I was going through this torment, I stayed up late and wrote my husband a letter (4 pages of nothing but doubts and fear) and he responded. In that letter he said one thing that opened my eyes. I will tell you the whole sentence. He wrote .."We have decided to pull Emily our of the devil's playground and he isn't happy about it." There are two words in there that finally opened my eyes....the devils playground. I asked my husband where he got those words and he said it just came to him, he said he felt God sent those words. So since the letter, I have had a few attacks but now that my eyes are opened and prepared for any attack.....they have really slowed down.

Your words of encouragment have been amazing, trusting in the Lord is the one and only answer.

Have a blessed day =) I wish all of  you lived in Michigan !!

MissTrombley
by on Feb. 13, 2013 at 1:19 PM
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Thanks KrissyKC for responding !!

I have been worrying about "catching up" and the reason for that is I looked at the Lifepac  third grade Math packet and saw that she was NO where near where she should be. I knew if I left her in school and waited to homeschool next year, she would be so far behind. But you are right, I have set standards according to PS and not HS. This is all new to me and we are so use to rigid guidelines......really is a wonderful adjustment =)

The Alpha Omega Lifepacs work great for us so far....only been three days...lol. BUT I have nothing to compare it to curriculum wise. Did you not like it due to the pace of the curriculum or..?

Thanks for taking time to respond, you have really helped me see things from a more homeschool perspective !!

MissTrombley
by on Feb. 13, 2013 at 1:25 PM
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Thanks for responding Tigerofmu !!

I thought I had replied to this but guess I hit the wrong button...no surprise there...lol.

Great advice on curriculum, I think I am comparing myself to others and you are right, if it works, it works =)

God bless and have a wonderful day !!

mclane5
by owner on Feb. 13, 2013 at 3:47 PM
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 I have the same thoughts and I have been HS for 5 years. I think this helps me to think like this to keep me on my toes. My children are not lacking in any area. I would not trade one day with my kids for peace of mind of family and friends. I enjoy being with my kids. My kids cry if I say they are going to be put in school.

As far as A.O.P you will not know if it works for you until you try it.It may take you several different ones to find out if you like it. You may choose something from every curriculum. That is fine.

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