A few months ago Emma had to get her well check done. She was fine in the waiting room but as soon as we made it to the little room because she remembered from the last visit what happens in the little room (she has a super advanced recall for someone so young). When she gets her shots both me and daddy have to hold her down.
Fastforward to today. We had to go in to get a wart on her thumb removed. I had just got her an Elmo at the doctors book from the library and we read it four times this morning. Again, she was fine until we went in the little room then she cried. The nurse came in and she's shy so she cried harder. Then the doctor came in, who was a man and not our main doctor and then she cried even harder. I literally layed my body down on her to hold her down and held one arm down while he tried to hold her other arm down to steady her so he could freeze the wart off her thumb. It took him four attempts. Her little legs were thrashing and screaming like a banshee and I even lost my footing for a second while holding her with all my might.
Is this going to pass? At what age may I possibly not have to completely restrain her. I nearly started bawling. It just sucked, but the wart was gross and big. We had another well visit in December for her two year and I know she will get shots again then and I'm SO dreading it. She didn't even want to go to the toy store after. She said she wanted to go home. Sigh, I hate this part of parenting.
I have found that talking to my daughter about what is going to happen even a few days beforehand, has helped. Talk to her about shots and how they feel like a beesting but also explain to her why it's good for her. I've been talking to DD about her visits since she was tiny, so Emma is definitely not too young for the conversation. I know it's not the same as the doctor, but when it's time for her first dentist visit, first take her with you to one of your visits to let her see what is going to happen. I called my dentists office about letting DD come to my visit and they were glad to have her come in and see all the tools. Maybe you could take her with you sometime to one of your doctor's visits.
My son will be five early next year and has followed the same pattern your Emma has since his very first doctor's visit. Crying uncontrollably when he sees the nurse and even worse when the doctor comes.
Part of his terror is from when he had to have his ear irrigated. He has some auditory sensitivity, and it must have sounded like a jet airplane blasting in his ear! He flipped and I had to hold him down. I know how awful you feel about that. It's like you wonder, can this be the right thing to do??
This last four year wellness appointment required him to do an eye exam. He was so teary-eyed and choked up, he couldn't get out the answers, so they couldn't get an accurate reading. We thought that it was bad memories from that particular office/doctor, so we made another appointment with a completely different place. He wasn't as bad there, but still had difficulty answering questions, and crying.
I wish I had an idea for you on how to get her over this, but I haven't figured one out. My son is able to understand that he has to see the doctor and we talk about it 'till we are blue in the face, but his protective instinct takes over and adrenaline sends him into the fight-or-flight response.
I pray someday he will be better about it.
(Not even being able to look at all the cool equipment at the doc's could calm him down. That's saying A LOT!!!)
How are you acting? Are you nervous and tense? Alot of times this will rub off on them. They will look to us on how to react in stressful situations. My husband is terrified of shots and needles, so he cant come to dr appointments. I swear he freaks out more than DS.
Also I would recommend just a "meeting" with the doc, in her office. At our pediatrician, each doc has their own office with toys and coloring books, maybe this would warm her up to the doc?
And we are calm as cucumbers before, during and afterwards. I'm gushing in her ear or face but nothing I do calms her so we just ride it out.
Anyway, Emma's obsessed with Caillou and darned if there wasn't this episode where he had to go back for a follow up to an ear ache. It was an annoying very very old poorly drawn different whiny voiced episode. He says his dinosaur was going to bite the doctor and something about being hurt by the doctor. Uggg...everything she does and says has been emulated from Caillou. We're getting her a doctor kit for her birthday next month, I hope it helps.
And it's not just Caillou. Since day one she's hated doctors touching her...especially the head measurement...the whole process ticks her off....lol.
I am very good at staying calm and we usually don't tell her we are going until we get there
My dd just turned 4 and I have found that talking to her about what to expect when she gets a shot really helps. She LOVES the doctor. Her 4 yr check up she knew she was getting shots and she just closed her eyes and took it. Didn't even cry. I have always been honest about when she is getting shots and she will tell me that "it just hurts like a pinch for a minute and then it it gone". I also make sure to take her with me when I get my flu shot or blood drawn so she sees that it is not so bad. My 2 1/2 yr old just got her flu shot and she was fine. Didn't cry. I also bring M&M's with me when they get shots and they get 5 M7M's after their shots. I have learned that with an advanced kid the more information they have about a situation they better they handle it. At least my dd does. HTH
Resoning and telling her what to expect doesn't help -yet
This is what I normally do for my son...but you know lately things have gone nutty as well. He still has to get bloodwork done and he won't let us :/. I need ot have him go with my hubby who can control him a hint better. But, I know what youare going through! My son could get shots/bloodwork like a champ. Suddenly, at age 4, not so much :/
Hang in there!
Quoting utkallie:I have found that talking to my daughter about what is going to happen even a few days beforehand, has helped. Talk to her about shots and how they feel like a beesting but also explain to her why it's good for her. I've been talking to DD about her visits since she was tiny, so Emma is definitely not too young for the conversation. I know it's not the same as the doctor, but when it's time for her first dentist visit, first take her with you to one of your visits to let her see what is going to happen. I called my dentists office about letting DD come to my visit and they were glad to have her come in and see all the tools. Maybe you could take her with you sometime to one of your doctor's visits.
Our DD had two doctor visits in the past two weeks. The first one she had to have some butterfly stiches by her eyebrow, and DH and I held her down. They had a mirror there, so she could see everything and considering everything she did great. I think the mirror helped.
She also had to go back to get her flu shot. DH & I got ours a few days before, and we took her with us. She saw how brave we were and we did not cry. When it was her turn a few days later, she did not cry either. When she was done, my DD said "All Done!" and thanked the nurse just like she observed DH & I do a few days later.
DD has an amazing recall of EVERYTHING!!! She even remembered places in Toronto we recently visited, and the last time we were there was in May.
Was your baby an "easy" a.k.a. "good" baby? (venting ahead)
- Abee2202
on Oct. 25, 2011 at 12:31 PM