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Posted by on Jan. 23, 2012 at 10:30 PM
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Just looking for some sound input on a different kinda of sleep issue we are having with Emma. actually it's more my issue and concern.
Sorry, my point....we are schedulers. Emma is on a schedule to a degree. I wake her at the same general time in the morning. I nap her around the same time. I try to get her to bed around the same time.
The issue is: she takes forever to fall asleep. Like an hour at least. We put her in her room, have an elaborate closing ceremony of book reading and goodnights that last forever-an hour then we leave and her door gets shut (small apt, have to close her door)
Should I feel bad/weird about leaving her in her room alone, playing by herself for an hour or more until she gets sleepy?
She still needs her nap or she's unreasonable near the end of the evening.
Thanks for anyone's input and suggestions.
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by on Jan. 23, 2012 at 10:30 PM
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by Group Admin on Jan. 23, 2012 at 10:37 PM

Watching for suggestions. That may simply be the way she is though, and that is how she wends down. If she does not seem unhappy, it should be fine. Is she always like that, even when obviously very tired, still needing that hour by herself? My son is 14, and he has always been that way. I never figured out how to get him to get to sleep quicker.

by on Jan. 23, 2012 at 10:41 PM


How old is she?  With my son, we allowed him to play quietly in his room as early as 15 months of age.  As long as he was quiet, reading books, playing quiet games we coudln't care less waht he was doing (as long as he wasn't hurting himself LOL).  He eventually falls asleep :), but at that age, sure :)

by on Jan. 24, 2012 at 1:06 AM
She is 25mo
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by on Jan. 24, 2012 at 1:52 AM

My Athena was like this as a child.  She didn't sleep well at night and took forever to get to sleep, it just took a long time for her mind to wind down to actually do it.  She didn't cope well with schedules, either - she gave up daytime naps at 12 months old (I could put her down for one but she wouldn't sleep at all, just play quietly in her room until she heard me moving around then she would cry to be let out).  She is 17 now and still takes a long time to get to sleep no matter what time she gets to bed.

Strangely enough, my other child, Ishtar, was an excellent sleeper.  She winds down easily, would fall asleep very quickly at night and still took daytime naps at 4!  Even now (she's 15) she will fall asleep in the middle of doing something - the number of times she has fallen asleep over her laptop on the sofa makes me laugh.  She's perfectly healthy, no insidious reason that she falls asleep that way, just she doesn't want to go to bed when she really should do.

by on Jan. 24, 2012 at 9:03 AM

Both of my kids take a long time to wind down. DS is content to sit in his crib and play but DD will not stay in her room. We have to give her melatonin to settle.

by on Jan. 24, 2012 at 9:18 AM
I start bedtime routine right after dinner around 5:30pm. Lately, by the time I get her in her room it's no earlier than 8pm. By the time I leave it's nine by the time she falls asleep at ten. Today I did not have to wake her. She was up at eight. And she is so tired and unreasonable. I opened my big mouth and told her we were going shopping after I woke daddy at ten and with her, you tell her too soon about something she sounds like a broken record. Is that normal for this age. She repeats everything back to back over and over like ten twenty times in row. I always answer her, so i sound no better then her repeating the same answer over and over.
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by on Jan. 24, 2012 at 11:11 AM
I don't think taking an hour to fall asleep is a lot, but I am speaking relative to my own experience; my oldest will take half the night or longer without melatonin. However, and this is just my 2 cents, I think an hour in her room is a lot. After dinner we do bath, maybe a tiny bit of quiet play or a family board game if time allows, then I sit with my girls to read two picture books usually (so they each get to pick one), then lights out. So I am not in their room for long, two books are maybe 15-20 min or so. If I were you, I would try to cut the process a little shorter and leave her in her room earlier, so maybe she can fall asleep earlier. If she won't fall asleep any earlier, than it could just be that she is in that in between stage where she is almost ready to give up a nap, but not quite. I just finished that stage with my youngest, it's rough.
by on Jan. 24, 2012 at 1:09 PM

A few thoughts:

Have you tried cutting out any sweet things after lunch?  I've noticed my son does better not eating/drinking anything with sugar (including fruit juice) after lunch. 

Just like adults, I think it may be worth a try to keep her bed just for sleeping.  No reading or playing while in bed.  Look up "good sleep hygiene" ideas.  Since your apartment is small, it could be tiny noises are filtering into her room and is stimulating her mind.  Have you tried white noise?

As for repeating back to you over and son still does that if I don't give him a detailed enough answer. (and especially if I don't answer at all because I'm thinking!)  She may be looking for a step-by-step breakdown of her time before she gets to go shopping, for instance. Or she could be hoping for a difference answer.

I've been known to tell my son that I heard him the first five times, and it's annoying to me (and others) when he keeps repeating himself.  He is just starting to cut back, so maybe try being honest with her and tell her not to repeat so much.

by on Jan. 24, 2012 at 2:22 PM
Okay lots of things to think about. Thank you, everyone.

She has a small stereo in her room. Part of the ritual is that she turns her music on. We rotate the CDs every few weeks.
I never thought to break down what we are doing in more details pertaining to the repeating. I will try that.
We don't really give her sweets. A Prime example why: a few weeks ago, she had been SO good the whole day so I told her if she'd taste her entree (steak) she could have two cookies (I made them and they were very small size) well duh me...she used her tongue to touch the steak....I should have said you have to eat one peice. Anyway, she tasted it like I asked her too so she got the cookies. My kid was bouncing, literally off the walls until ten. I'd never seen her like this before. No more sugar after dinner.
So for lunch she usually gets pb sandwich, yogurt and a veg. Not every single day mind you this is just a general example.
She does get juice but it's 11oz water to 1oz juice.
She usually runs around for a half hour to poop and burn energy then it's off to nap.
Today we had to go shopping and we got a late start so it was 1pm before she got lunch and we put her in her room by 1:45pm and left with out stories and crying for about two minutes after we closed the door. I can hear her throwing her books on the floor right now so it's been a half hour and I know she's exhausted.
I wonder if I can download a white noise cd and burn it to try it out and see if that would make a difference. Our floor creaks and loud car noises scare her as of this past week so they could be disturbing her
Sorry this got rather rambly.
Thanks again, I knew I could count on this fine group of ladies. I have a lot to think about and to discuss with my husband now.
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by on Jan. 26, 2012 at 8:24 AM
Update: we've been leaving the room quicker but it still takes her an hour to fall asleep. Next step is to reduce the bedtime routine.
And re: the repeating. I answered differently and it worked.
Ex: mama, are we going to do the shopping? X5 yes Emma, we are going shopping. We are going to get some juice and other things. We are going to finish getting dressed and we are going to go for a drive and go shopping. Okay was her response.
Lol, such a simple fix I would have never thought to do. Thanks!!!!!!!
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