am i wrong???

[jennh24]

ok so my boyfriend and i had a great sex life before i had my son now he is all upset cause i dotnwant to have sex and i expressed my concern that once dr says its ok ill be to tired or emotionally drained i have pretty bad baby blues and have been having panic attacks he has stated that he will feel hurt and like i dont want him if i dont have sex with him once givin the ok by dr so he went to his ex fuck buddy (who is a slut and is sleeping with 5-8 guys at any givin tim) and asked her when she started having sex after her daughter and when she regained the erge she told him that she started having sex a week after cause she had a c section and that the urge was back by the day after she had her baby and that her dr told her that its a myth that women lose there sex drive or cant have sex for the healing time and she told him that im lying and that she worked 40 hour + weeks and was single parent but still never felt to tired or stressed or emotionally drained so im just trying to be a drama queen or trying to control him.... so i ask you how long after you had you kid(s) did you start having sex? how long before your drive was back? how long before you had enough energy?

[jodia001]

It's different for every woman & every kid for that matter. There are many factors that contribute to a lack of desire. Most men express there emotions on a physical level & without sex they feel unloved.

I have been married 17 years & we have 2 kids. There are days where I am exhausted because the baby kept me up all night but I still had to get up at 6 am with my teen. Naps are rare for me during the week with having to pick up my older son & then doing to band practice, karate & what have you. Some days I just do not feel up to sex too. DH understands that until it gets to be too long for his liking...then he starts acting on his feelings. Usually, I find that I get into it from his attentions...even when I am drop dead tired.

What I am trying to say is you don't always have to be all reved up to get physical with your husband boyfriend.

[jennh24]

bump

[jennh24]

thank you everyone for answering i know this was kinda personal but i just worry that im being selfish and that im not normal my boyfriend really has been on me about when we ganna get back to love making-jenn

[briarraindancer]

When my daughter was born, it was almost a year before sex wasn't physically painful for me. I tore up front, and even after the stitches came out, I hurt. It took another year after that for me to even have a sex drive, and I still don't have much of one--six years later.
Every woman IS different, but those of us who give birth vaginally have a harder time with it. Your body was changed after giving birth. And it won't ever feel quite the same way again.
You just have to give it time. You will heal, and you will have a sex drive again. But be aware, even if your drive has changed, your boyfriend's hasn't. Most men do take it personally when their sex lives change; it makes them feel like they aren't good enough, or that they are inferior in some way.
But there are many ways to work around this--oral sex is a good start. And be sure you're talking about it. It may be hard for him to understand at first, but this isn't about him. It's about you.
Good luck!

 Hugs and Blessings!!!
                                  ~~Briar

[MomVten]

The earliest My husband and I had sex was 4 wks after...but very carefully..gentle.. I used to wait for the ok at 6wks...once again being gentle is key and you want feel safe. I hope you can talk it out and then have a nice evening, maybe a glass of wine, a nice hot bath, to relax you ..but it is important to be on the same page with him first!