So, as a 36 year old mom with 6 children, I really joined this group thinking of myself more of a mentor. But, I see everyone else sees themselves that way too. Hm. Well, here I am, with all my wisdom and experience, asking for help! How ironic! :o) Here's the story:
We have been struggling with Hannah (4th grade, age 9) for the last 2 weeks. Her teacher called me a couple of weeks ago to tell me that Hannah has not been turning in home work at all. I thought that was odd since I asked her everyday if she had any. She always told me she finished it in class. Well, come to find out, all lies. So, we've been working on getting all the make up work done and she continues to lie to me about what homework she has. I looked at her assignment book this morning, saw an assignment there and asked her if it was done. "yes," she tells me. I ask to see it. She immediately gets that "I've been caught in a lie" look. Great. She pulls out the pages and they are totally blank. I just don't understand this. It's really simple work that would take her 5 min. to do. I asked about another assignment listed and she said she forgot it at school yesterday.
So, I tell her she is not to sit with her friend this morning before school. She has to get her work done before school. They leave, and I call her teacher. Mrs. M tells me that she is continuing to have problems with Hannah in class, doing her work. Then she commented, "she really struggles with spelling, doesn't she?" And see, that's the weird thing. She doesn't. At least not last year. It was routine for her to bring home 100% on spelling tests. Then I told the teacher the problem is with the way reading it taught. There is so much focus on sight words and reading that kids aren't taught how the sounds go together to make a word. So, Hannah knows that a certain 5 letters are in a word. She'll just rattle them off in any order. Mrs. M actually agreed and told me I was the second parent this week to have this same complaint. Ok, well, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!! Geez!!! It's so frustrating!
So, now Hannah has lost activities until this homework situation is under control. Today was to be her first Girl Scout meeting for the year, and she can't go. She has so much make up work she has to get done, even if I was inclined to allow it, there simply isn't time. I just wish I knew what happened between last year and this. She just did not have these problems last year. Anyone have any thoughts as to why she's suddenly "losing" or "forgetting" homework? Why she's lying to me about it nearly every single day? The worst that happens if she tells me she forgot something is I make her walk back to school to get it (3 blocks). But, lying, I can't tolerate. There is no reason to lie to me. For this, there is usually a discipline. I just don't get it.
We have been struggling with Hannah (4th grade, age 9) for the last 2 weeks. Her teacher called me a couple of weeks ago to tell me that Hannah has not been turning in home work at all. I thought that was odd since I asked her everyday if she had any. She always told me she finished it in class. Well, come to find out, all lies. So, we've been working on getting all the make up work done and she continues to lie to me about what homework she has. I looked at her assignment book this morning, saw an assignment there and asked her if it was done. "yes," she tells me. I ask to see it. She immediately gets that "I've been caught in a lie" look. Great. She pulls out the pages and they are totally blank. I just don't understand this. It's really simple work that would take her 5 min. to do. I asked about another assignment listed and she said she forgot it at school yesterday.
So, I tell her she is not to sit with her friend this morning before school. She has to get her work done before school. They leave, and I call her teacher. Mrs. M tells me that she is continuing to have problems with Hannah in class, doing her work. Then she commented, "she really struggles with spelling, doesn't she?" And see, that's the weird thing. She doesn't. At least not last year. It was routine for her to bring home 100% on spelling tests. Then I told the teacher the problem is with the way reading it taught. There is so much focus on sight words and reading that kids aren't taught how the sounds go together to make a word. So, Hannah knows that a certain 5 letters are in a word. She'll just rattle them off in any order. Mrs. M actually agreed and told me I was the second parent this week to have this same complaint. Ok, well, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!! Geez!!! It's so frustrating!
So, now Hannah has lost activities until this homework situation is under control. Today was to be her first Girl Scout meeting for the year, and she can't go. She has so much make up work she has to get done, even if I was inclined to allow it, there simply isn't time. I just wish I knew what happened between last year and this. She just did not have these problems last year. Anyone have any thoughts as to why she's suddenly "losing" or "forgetting" homework? Why she's lying to me about it nearly every single day? The worst that happens if she tells me she forgot something is I make her walk back to school to get it (3 blocks). But, lying, I can't tolerate. There is no reason to lie to me. For this, there is usually a discipline. I just don't get it.
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Posted by
on Sep. 18, 2007 at 9:27 AM
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by
Group Owner
on Sep. 19, 2007 at 11:31 AM
My first thought is that there is some conflict between Hannah and her teacher. She may not be able to verbablize it, but she may not be getting along with her, or Hannah may be unresponsive or bristle at teh teacher's teaching style. That happened to me alot. Another thought is that she might be entering puberty and this could be the beginning of that happy (toungue in cheek!) road.
Last, you may consider a child psychologist to determine if there is something else that is troubling her that she won't let you in on, like changes with friends, bullying, etc.
We sometimes have to restrict activities for behavior that is related to our daughter's ADHD/ODD, to help set stricter limits. It sucks. I would much rather just let her have fun, too, but I feel for you on this one!
Love, Lexa
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by
on Sep. 19, 2007 at 10:44 PM
She may be bored. If she is academically gifted, then the mundane activities in her normal class may be boring her. I entered AG when I was Hannah's age. They noticed b/c I got into a lot of trouble b/c I was bored. I could do things instantly that other kids took weeks to learn. She may need a real challenge. You say she used to bring home 100's, and now she just won't do her work. Have her tested for AG. If that's not the case, she may have some kind of dyslexia or something that keeps her from getting it right away, so she refuses to do her work. Also, she may be entering a rebellious period where she doesn't want to do her work anymore, but would rather socialize. Or, she feels very challenged with the new material from the new year and thinks she can't get it, so she doesn't want to try.
Do you sit down with her and encourage her with her homework, and show lots of enthusiasm?
Do you sit down with her and encourage her with her homework, and show lots of enthusiasm?
by
on Sep. 20, 2007 at 2:17 AM
Quoting stefanierios:stefanierios took the words right out of my mouth. We have the same problem with Logan when he gets bored. You should definitely request testing. You might also want to contact Hannah's teacher from last year & ask if she ever noticed her getting bored & what she did to make things interesting. One of Logan's teachers would let him read a comic when he was done with all of his work & the rest of the class wasn't finished yet, another teacher would have him help another student that was struggling with the assignment.
She may be bored. If she is academically gifted, then the mundane activities in her normal class may be boring her. I entered AG when I was Hannah's age. They noticed b/c I got into a lot of trouble b/c I was bored. I could do things instantly that other kids took weeks to learn. She may need a real challenge. You say she used to bring home 100's, and now she just won't do her work. Have her tested for AG. If that's not the case, she may have some kind of dyslexia or something that keeps her from getting it right away, so she refuses to do her work. Also, she may be entering a rebellious period where she doesn't want to do her work anymore, but would rather socialize. Or, she feels very challenged with the new material from the new year and thinks she can't get it, so she doesn't want to try.
Do you sit down with her and encourage her with her homework, and show lots of enthusiasm?
Besides punishments when Hannah hasn't done the work or lies, you might want to also have rewards for when she does complete her homework with out you having to be on top of her.
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anyone who has had baby before please help
- fulqvr
on Sep. 18, 2007 at 9:27 AM