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I am hurting REALLY BAD "emotionally"

Posted by on Jul. 28, 2009 at 5:22 PM
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 I really never did get over my ectopic in OCT/Nov '08 in fact it got worse and nowI went for my HSG today. Everyone is different and I don't want to scare you but they put a catheter in your va jay jay and through the cervix, blow up a balloon on the cath so no dye goes out and that part hurts for some it did not me it wasn't until after that hurt like HELL for me I also was nauseated to the fact I wanted to vomit to feel better. But like I said not everyone is the same with it. It took 5 minutes and my left tube spilled out fast and the right not so much but eventually did... that tube is "no Good" and it actually was the tube that had the ectopic so there was prolly an infection there before or during that pregnancy. I am hurting emotionally SOOOOO BAD right now, I feel bad for my hubby I havent talked to him in like the whole car drive home.... My only option is to do injections(which I dont know if I can do to myself) which you are a human pin cushion for. They want to try to do this for a cycle or two and if doesnt work alone then try with IUI. If that doesnt work I am an excellent candidate for IVF but not in my husbands"book keeping" so unfortunately my one baby is probably going to be an only and I AM SOOOO SAD:,-( 

I know some people out there are superbly using the well at least you have one child comment. But I dont want him to be an only... I want him to have someone to grow with if something were to happen of my hubby and i. I also quit college and now cant get a good job ever unless going back to school and I REALLY love the job of a mom it's all I want to do and can't do it past one I think...   :,-( Sorry so long

by on Jul. 28, 2009 at 5:22 PM
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lovely_notes
by Member on Jul. 30, 2009 at 4:51 PM

I found out my pregnancy was an ectopic Oct. 1, 08 and had surgery the same day in which they had to remove my right tube because of where the baby got "stuck." (right where the tube and uterus meet) I feel your pain! I too have one child (12 yrs. old) and have been married for just over a year and I'd love nothing more than to have a child with my husband. We have been TTC since the ectopic and nothing. My doctor said my left tube is in good and I should have no trouble...but it's been 9 months! I tell myself daily that at least I have one child and ther are some who may never get to even have one. For the first time in my life I yearn to have life growing inside of me. I was young and unwed with my daughter and I never desired to have more children but now that I'm married and stable, it's all I can think about. I'm 32 have one tube, I'm starting to feel the odds stack against me. The one thing that does encourage me is my faith. I am a believer and I believe everything does happen for a reason. I may not know or understand now but by and by I know I'll understand it! Try to be encouraged saralee, and know that you are not alone.

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