LETS SHARE SOMETHING ABOUT OURSELVES

[DOVE5397]

HELLO MY NAME IS DOVE.

 MY PARENTS HAD US KIDS.. BUT THAT WAS PRETTY MUCH IT. THEY NEVER TOOK MUCH INTEREST IN US. ALL 6 OF US WERE JUST THERE. I WAS THE  YOUNGEST THE ONE CLOSET TO MY AGE WAS 6 YEARS OLDER THEN ME.. SOME PHYSICAL ABUSE WHEN DAD BECAME MAD.

I WAS BORN WITH A CLEFT LIP AND CLEFT PALATE AND WAS ALWAYS REMINDED THAT THEIR MONEY PROBLEMS WAS MY FAULT.BECAUSE OF MY MEDICAL BILLS THEY COULDN'T BUY THE THINGS THAT THEY WANTED. AT THE AGE OF 8 I WAS RUNNING THE STREETS TILL MIDNIGHT OR 1 IN THE MORNING. BY AGE 9  I WAS GETTING DRUNK,AND BECAME A DRINKER EVEN IN FRONT OF THE PARENTS.WAS SMOKING POT BY AGE 10 WHICH LEAD TO STRONGER DRUGS. SO I ENDED UP WITH A DRINKING PROBLEM FROM AGE 9 TO 19, AND A DRUG PROBLEM FROM AGE 10 TO AGE 19. IT WAS A WAY TO NOT FEEL ALL OF THE PAIN. FROM 15 TO 19 I WAS INVOLVED WITH GANG LIFE..WHY? TRYING TO FIND A PLACE WHERE I FELT WANTED.I ALWAYS TOLD MYSELF THAT IF I EVER BECAME PREGNANT THAT I WOULD STRAIGHTEN UP AND BE THE TYPE OF PARENT THAT I NEVER HAD.DUE TO  THE   FACT GETTING HIT BY A CAR AT 18 I WAS TOLD THAT I COULD NEVER HAVE KIDS. I HAD MY FIRST DAUGHTER TWO MONTHS SHY OF TURNING 20, MY SECOND 22 MONTHS LATER, MY TWIN DAUGHTERS 22 MONTHS LATER AND MY SON 4 1/2 YEARS LATER. I KEPT MY WORD TO MYSELF AND BY THE GRACE OF GOD NEVER RETURNED TO DRINKING A ND  DRUGS.

IN MY 16TH YEAR OF LIFE I WAS RAPED THREE TIMES. DROPPED OUT OF SCHOOL BY THE 10 GRADE. WHY NOT I WAS THR QUEEN OF D'S AND F'S ANYWAY. ONLY WENT TO SCHOOL WHEN I FELT LIKE IT. NEVER NEEDED TO DITCH, PARENTS WOULD NOT PUSH SCHOOLING OR EDUCATION. THEY WOULD TAKE OFF TO WORK EACH DAY AND LEAVE IT UP TO US WEATHER WE WENT OR NOT. I HATED GOING AS I WAS ALWAYS TEASED. FROM KINDER GARDEN ON FOR MY BIG EYES,CLEFT LIP AND SPEECH PROBLEMS. BY 4 GRADE I HAD ALREADY BECAME A VERY  ANGRY PERSON. THE HOME LIFE AND THE TEASING I HAD A WISE GRANDMA THAT TOLD ME TO LEARN TO STAND UP FOR MYSELF. SOO THATS WHAT I DID. I WAS ALWAYS IN TROUBLE WITH THE STAFF AS I WAS TOLD BUT NEVER TAUGHT THE RIGHT WAY TO STAND UP FOR MYSELF.

THE SCARS  STILL WITH ME. BUT GOD HAD HIS HAND ON ME. I BROUGHT MYSELF UP. AND MADE MANY MISTAKES BUT HERE TODAY I MADE IT THROUGH ALL OF THE BAD TIMES. WAS ABLE TO RAISE 5 CHILDREN AND HAVE ALWAYS HAD A GREAT, OPEN RELATIONSHIP WITH THEM. MY KIDS ARE POOF THAT WHEN YOU ARE BROUGHT UP A BAD WAY.. YOU CAN CHANGE AND BE A DECENT PARENT TO YOUR OWN, THE ABUSE TRAITS DON'T ALWAYS HAVE TO CONTINUE IN THE ONES THAT WERE ABUSED.

[tie-dye-mom]

I'm sorry you had to go through all that, but it sounds like you are probably one of the better parents out there just because you have tried to learn from yours and your parents mistakes. The scariest thing is that many parents just expect their children to raise themselves and don't realize the effort and sacrafice parenting takes. God Bless You. -Donna

[DOVE5397]

THANKS FOR READING MY POST AND FOR REPLYING.

Quoting tie-dye-mom:

I'm sorry you had to go through all that, but it sounds like you are probably one of the better parents out there just because you have tried to learn from yours and your parents mistakes. The scariest thing is that many parents just expect their children to raise themselves and don't realize the effort and sacrafice parenting takes. God Bless You. -Donna

[andreamom]

Hi Dove, I love your name by the way.  It symbolizes peace.  Although in reading your post, you had a tough life in your younger years.  I can relate.  We all need some attention and love, and people who don't receive love and attention, seek it wherever they can find it.  I'm glad you're no longer running the streets, doing drugs, and being taken advantage of sexually.  No child of God deserves to live a reckless lifestyle.  You've been very strong after all you've been through, and I think God has done great things for you.  You are blessed.

Take care!  

[DOVE5397]

THANKS FRIEND.

YSIC

DOVE

[DOVE5397]

 I WAS ONE THAT DITCHED CLASSES AND DITCHED SCHOOL PERIOD. IT STARTED WHEN I WAS IN JR HIGH.(7TH GRADE) THE FIRST FEW TIMES OF DITCHING A CLASS OR TO WITH A FRIEND 2 GRADES HIGHER THEN ME I WAS A NERVOUS WREAK. THEN IT WENT TO DITCHING MORE THEN ONE CLASS HERE AND THERE. IN 8TH GRADE I WOULD DITCH HALF DAYS AND GET MY FRIENDS IN THE 7TH AND 8TH AND 9TH GRADES TO JOIN ME. WE HARDLY GOT CAUGHT. I KNEW HOW TO COPY MY DADS SIGNATURE TO A T. 9TH GRADE I WOULD SKIP SCHOOL FOR TWO DAYS IN A ROW. MY FRIENDS WOULD GET CAUGHT AND THEIR PARENTS CALLED.. THEY WOULD GET IN TROUBLE.. BUT ME I WOULD NEVER GET IN TROUBLE EVEN WHEN I DID GET CAUGHT.. WHY?? MY PARENTS DIDN'T CARE IF I DID OR DIDN'T GO TO SCHOOL. IT WAS THEC HALLENGE OF NOT  GETTING NOT GETTING CAUGHT BY SCHOOL STAFF AND GETTING DENTENTION OR EXPELLED THAT THRILLED ME.  I WOULD GET IN MORE TROUBLE BY THE STAFF THEN BY MY PARENTS. I WAS THE YOUNGEST OF SIX. THE ONE CLOEST TO ME WAS 6 1/2 YEARS OLDER THEN ME. BY THE TIME I WAS BEGAINING 6TH GRADE IT WAS UP TO ME WEATHER I DID OR DIDN'T GO TO SCHOOL.

OUR HOME WAS A TEENAGE KICK BACK SPOT. WHERE MY OLDER SIBLINGS AND THERE FRIENDS WOULD HANG OUT, DRINK,SMOKE POT,DO DRUGS AND SO ON. WHAT BETTER WAY TO KEEP LITTLE SISTER OUT OF THEIR HAIR.. EASY BY AGE 8 THEY WERE GETTING  ME DRUNK, BY AGE 9 I WAS RUNNING THE STREETS,AND AGE 10 SMOKING POT. BY JR HIGH I WAS DRUNK EVERY OTHER DAY ABOUT AND SMOKING POT AND TAKING SPEED. SOON STARTED DOING CRANK AND HASH. BY THE AGE OF 15 I WAS STAYING GONE FROM HOME AS LONG AS I FELT LIKE. KNEW THAT AS LONG AS I WAS HIGH ON CRANK I COULD DRINK ALL I WANTED AND NOT FEEL DRUNK. TO GET EATTING MONEY I WOULD BET OTHERS THAT I COULD OUT DRINK THEM. AND THANKS TO THE CRANK I ALWAYS DID. IF I GOT PICKED UP BY THE COPS MY PARENTS WOULD COME GET ME TELLING THE COPS I HAD RAN AWAY. TAKE ME HOME FOR THE SAKE OF PUTTING ON A GOOD SHOW.. AND I WAS GONE AGAIN. BY THEN I WAS ALSO SMOKING THOSE MORE CIGS DIPPED IN SHERM.  MY 16TH YEAR OF LIFE I WAS RAPPED 3 X'S. AFTER BEING RAPPED  I WAS  JUMPED INTO A GANG.I FIGURED I NEEDED SOME KIND OF FAMILY.. RIGHT? LOL

SMOKING,DRINKING,AND GETTING HIGH WENT ON DAILY FOR 3 MORE YEARS. AT AGE 18 I WAS HIT BY A CAR AND TOLD THAT I WOULD NEVER HAVE KIDS. ALL OF MY SO CALLED FRIENDS WERE HAVING KIDS. AND WERE EVEN TAKING THEM TO THE PARTIES.. NOW EVEN THOUGH I WAS NEVER IN MY RIGHT MIND.. THOSE BABIES BEING THERE BOTHERED ME AND I FOUND MYSELF WATCHING OVER THEM THE BEST THAT I COULD. I WOULD TELL THEIR PARENTS THAT IF I WAS EVER ABLE TO GET PREGNANT THAT I WOULD WALK AWAY FROM THE DRINKING,DRUGS AND LIVING THE STUPID LIFE.. I WOULD ALWAYS BE TOLD.."YEAH IT IS EASY FOR YOU TO SAY THAT.. YOU CAN'T GET PREGNANT!"

NOW THIS IS WHERE IT ALL GETS INTERESTING.. I HAD BORN AGAIN, SPIRIT FILLED,PRAYER WARRIOR,BIBLE THUMPING GRAND PARENTS THAT WERE SPENDING TONS OF TIME ON THEIR KNEES PRAYING FOR THEIR GRAND KIDS.

AT ONE POINT I AM TOLD BY MY DOCTOR THAT IF I CONTINUED WITH ALL THAT I WAS DOING,HE GAVE ME 6 MONTHS TO LIVE. 2 MONTHS LATER I FOUND OUT THAT I WAS PREGNANT. I WALKED AWAY FROM WALKING THE WALK AND TALKING THE TALK. AN OLD FRIEND INVITED ME TO A CHURCH CALLED VICTORY FAITH CENTER IN WILMINGTON CALIFORNIA TO SEE A PLAY CALLED "MI VIDA LOCA" IN ENGLISH "MY CRAZY LIFE" IT WAS A PLAY ABOUT GANG MEMBERS GETTING SAVED AND WALKING AWAY FROM..WALKING THE WALK,AND TALKING THE TALK. WELL MY THIRD VISIT TO THAT CHURCH I GAVE MY LIFE TO THE LORD. I NO LONGER NEEDED TO WALK ANY WALK,OR TALK ANY TALK.

SOON AFTER I GOT SAVED, 2 MORE OF MY SIBLINGS GOT SAVED AND DELIVERED FROM DRINKING AND DRUGS.. A FEW YEARS LATER TWO MORE. THERE IS STILL ONE THAT HASN'T GIVEN IN.. BUT BY GODS GRACE SHE WILL. BEFORE MY GRAND PARENTS DIED THEY GOT TO WITNESS 5 OF THEIR GRAND CHILDREN SERVING THE LORD. 

THERE IS A SONG THATS CALLED THANK YOU BY RAY BOLTS AND I WANT TO SHARE THE LYRICS OF THAT SONG WITH YOU. ITS A SONG THAT FITS MY GRAND PARENTS PERFECTLY..

Thank You

I dreamed I went to heaven
And you were there with me
We walked upon the streets of gold
Beside the crystal sea
We heard these angels singing
Then someone called your name
You turned and saw this young man
And he was smiling as he came
And he said friend you may not know me now
And then he said, but wait
You used to teach my Sunday School
When I was only eight
And every week you would say a prayer
Before the class would start
And one day when you said that prayer
I asked Jesus in my heart

CHORUS
Thank you for giving to the Lord
I am a life that was changed
Thank you for giving to the Lord
I am so glad you gave

Then another man stood before you
And said remember the time
A missionary came to your church
And his pictures made you cry
You didn’t have much money 
But you gave it anyway
Jesus took the gift you gave
And that’s why I’m here today

CHORUS (repeat)

One by one they came
Far as your eyes could see
Each life somehow touched
By your generosity
Little things that you had done
Sacrifices you made
They were unnoticed on the earth
In heaven now proclaimed

And I know that up in heaven
You’re not supposed to cry
But I am almost sure
There were tears in your eyes
As Jesus took your hand
And you stood before the Lord
He said, my child look around you
For great is your reward

CHORUS (repeat)

I am so glad you gave.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UFrdJ2V3r7Y&feature=related 

PLEASE CLICK THE LINK ABOVE TO SEE THE VIDEO.

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 PLEASE SHARE YOUR TESTAMONY WITH THE REST OF US.

[andreamom]

Dove...You're very courageus for giving out so much information about your personal life.  You have taken a different direction now, and you seem to be doing well.  God was watching over you, and wanted to turn your life around for the better. All He needed to know was if you were also willing to let Him take control, and make those changes in your life.