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Why are people so insensitive?

Posted by on Feb. 23, 2012 at 1:06 PM
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My son is 8 months old & he is as white as me & has red hair.  He has had no color show up at all!  I think the only thing he got from me was my complexion!  Otherwise he is his dad mini me.  People always have to say, "OMG, he is so white."  I can clearly see what my son looks like.  I have had someone insist he is albino.  People have asked my husband, "Are you sure he is yours?"  And one time when my husband was in the store with my son, the cashier asked, "Whose baby is that?"  Do other people deal with ignorant people saying ignorant things about their biracial children?  What's wrong with saying he is cute or handsome?

by on Feb. 23, 2012 at 1:06 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MomTiara19
by Member on Feb. 24, 2012 at 7:54 PM

Hi,

I know what you mean.It would be to easy to have some class...lol...

Alot of people have no clue that african americans have alot of mix in our heritage.

Your husband may have alot of white,or spanish in his genes and ancestory.

So although dark skinned he is carrying alot of light genes.

I have alot of american indian in my heritage.My dh is light with blond hair and blue eyes but is full italian and sicilian.

Our kids look exotic and more spanish.

That is the beauty of mixed kids they come in so many beautiful complections.

~Tia

DylansMum8904
by New Member on Feb. 25, 2012 at 9:40 AM

Wow, sounds like you're surrounded by ignorant people. I'm not sure where you live but maybe that has something to do with it. I am dark-complected Black and my husband is "pasty" (his words, not mine) White. My son, for the first year of his life, looked White. Still, no one was ever brave or stupid enough to vocalize what I am sure they were thinking but have actually said to you. To answer your question, though, I don't know why people are so insensitive but I suspect it stems from them simply being uneducated in matters of race (or they are simply racist; I always want to give people the benefit of a doubt but as my son gets older and is involved in more social settings, it is becoming easy to spot "those" folks!) All the best to you and your beautiful family! love you sign

jrphelps
by New Member on Feb. 27, 2012 at 9:28 AM
1 mom liked this

Over the weekend we got this from another black person, "He is YOUR son?"  My husband replied, "YES!"  The guy said, "But uh, when a white woman has a black man's baby, the baby usually turns out darker, you know what I mean?"  NO!  I have no clue, please fill me in further with your stupidnesss!

honeyb690
by Member on Mar. 2, 2012 at 12:43 AM
we get that a lot. when I say well his mama is mixed they still say well she should still have some color. somethings I just wanna knock some since in to people

Quoting jrphelps:

Over the weekend we got this from another black person, "He is YOUR son?"  My husband replied, "YES!"  The guy said, "But uh, when a white woman has a black man's baby, the baby usually turns out darker, you know what I mean?"  NO!  I have no clue, please fill me in further with your stupidnesss!

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Devonhall
by on Apr. 11, 2012 at 4:06 PM

My son is 9 months. We haven't had anyone say anything to us but people do tend to examine us. My husband gets very offended.

queenkai
by New Member on Apr. 14, 2012 at 7:50 PM

People can not help but be who they are and it sometimes is not meant to be mean and sometime it is.  I have 5 mixed kids and they are all very light.  Most people think they are Hispanic.  When we lived in Cali people would often speak Spanish to them.  Here in the south I am always asked if they are mine or "what are they mixed with.  Its just something I have learned to deal with.  My husband and I both know that these kids are part of both of us no matter what they look like or other peoples opinions.  My own mother in-law questions their paternity because two don't look like him(they look like me).  Good luck and Good bless 

Anellie
by New Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 11:41 AM

Wow, I'm so sorry you have to deal with ignorance of some people. I'm Puerto Rican, and hubby is Black. Our soon to be 4 yr. old, has my complexion, curly hair, and his Daddy's looks. We live in South Carolina, and I have yet to have some one "dare" say anything "offensive" to me about our son.  They do inquire, where I'm from because I look "Native American or Indian"... ,and we do get a lot  "Oh, how cute, or handsome"; and we most definitely get the "stares" and "looks" LOL     Sending you some positive vibes!!! All the best to you and your family. 

Anellie
by New Member on May. 1, 2012 at 11:40 AM
2 moms liked this

Yesterday, I responded to your post; and today I found an article that "fits us to the tee" :) 

http://www.multiculturalfamilia.com/2012/01/30/biracial-parenting-for-the-last-time-shes-mine/#axzz1tcsu1V2r

I hope it helps! :) 

SoInLoveYS
by on Jul. 19, 2012 at 1:16 PM
Im lucky everyone just assumes we are the same race so we do not have this problem, plus Boston is very mixed race and more excepting. If it was me I woudnt get emotional I would be smart. The cashier situation I would complain to the manager personally and write a letter to corporate office, that's so rude to ask him that,,

I will always TRY to show my child the high road but if someone REALLY crosses the line I will probably punch them in the face (I know this is wrong but some people need to learn to stfu!)

Sorry u have to deal with these unfortunate situations
2monstersmommy
by New Member on Aug. 20, 2012 at 11:08 AM

I dare someone to ask me what my kids are "mixed-with"! They are humans not dogs....

My boys are hispainic and white btw... :)

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