Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

why does it matter so much to white girls?

Posted by   + Show Post

I hope this doesnt come off as sounding judgemental or like im trying to talk shit but it seems like in this group and a couple other groups that are about biracial children alot of the posts are from caucasion females concerned that their children are too light or dont look black enough and I was just curious why does it even matter?

by on Nov. 21, 2012 at 10:18 PM
Replies (21-27):
daina-claire
by New Member on Dec. 6, 2012 at 6:26 PM
Got cha 😉it seems though its the trend also it's being glamorized by modeling agencies to book biracial children celebrities added to the mix just thickens the plot on the flip side there are Caucasian who are initially attracted to African American men so when they have their children I guess most would treasure the child which most resembles the father , times they are a changing interracial relationships are more accepted in this day and age most surely
MsLogansMommy
by Member on Dec. 6, 2012 at 6:36 PM

I think it is great that interracial relationships are being more accepted as they should be I dont think anyone should be discriminated against because of who they love. I was just curious about some of these young girls and their thinking so I asked a question.

My dd tends to take everything I say out of context lol and one day she came home wanting blonde hair and blue eyes and I told her all the beautiful things about her own features so then she gets on this kick that mommy wants to be black and so I had to straighten that out and tell her I love who God made me and so should you. I think sometimes these girls may be sending mixed signals to their children about not loving their selves I try to incorporate all sides of my dd heritage in to her life and not make one part seem better than the other I want to raise a strong woman not an insecure girl who is easily influenced by the latest trend I think we should all raise our kids to love exactly who they are not because it is the current fad kwim?

Quoting daina-claire:

Got cha 😉it seems though its the trend also it's being glamorized by modeling agencies to book biracial children celebrities added to the mix just thickens the plot on the flip side there are Caucasian who are initially attracted to African American men so when they have their children I guess most would treasure the child which most resembles the father , times they are a changing interracial relationships are more accepted in this day and age most surely


conejoazul
by on Dec. 6, 2012 at 6:50 PM
1 mom liked this

Well, it does sound like your nurse might have been misinformed. Did you say your husband is black in a higher up post? "Black" can come from a lot of areas in the world since the centuries of African slavery, but "mongolian spots" are real and have nothing to do with persons whose genes are from what we consider the current Africans ... they appear in Oriental races (though I am not sure if in ALL of them) and usually in the populations of Native Americans whose origens are from the Bering Strait migrations.  I would think the spots could appear on a black person if their genes were mixed enough, but honestly, I´ve never heard it discussed or thought to ask any of the blacks I know in Mexico. That would be worth investigating.

My son had one. My husband is of Otomi descent in Mexico, so it was expected.

About the skin color concerns, I would encourage the OP not to get too bent out of shape about it. I´ve learned not to. My biracial son was born in Mexico and peopel think he isn´t white enough and family members were disappointed that he didn´t end up with blue eyes, which I am like, well, even if he was candy-cane-striped he is the world´s most beautiful baby to me.

People are attracted to appearances frequently. Biology made us that way. What we find attractive is variable.

Quoting honeyb690:

the worst one is right after I had her the nurse asked if Im sure my husband was the daddy. I said wtf(I was still a little out of it) what type of question is that she was like well biracial children have Mongolian spots.

Quoting MsLogansMommy:

I cant imagine what goes through someones head that would say something like that and I can see how that would be frustrating but still why let it bother you they are a complete stranger and their opinion shouldnt matter I honestly couldnt care less what nationality a stranger thinks my baby is.


Quoting honeyb690:

It don't bother me and in white. What bothers me is when strange people come up and say awwww she's sooooooo pretty what is she mixed with??? I say white and black and they say are you sure. 0_o what type of question is that???



daina-claire
by New Member on Dec. 6, 2012 at 9:07 PM
1 mom liked this
Oh absolutely it's plastered all over the place if you're black a biracial woman is the face of the ebony line as for causian blond thin blue eyes is what sells its societal views of course as long as you empower your dd with strong values of her heritage beauty on both aspects your individuality will be what sets her apart from societies views being unique 💝
bchic24
by Member on Dec. 6, 2012 at 9:11 PM
I've never said anything like that. I think my son is perfect! =D
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
BabyCat13
by New Member on Jan. 17, 2013 at 2:49 PM

I agree. I'm also white, husband is puerto rican and I notice often that white mothers seem to want their babies to get darker. I don't know what the fascination is. My husband is actually rather hopeful that our babies will stay as light as possible though.

I don't know, it definitely seems like everyone is out to prove something these days.

Hersolomommy
by New Member on Jan. 20, 2013 at 8:54 PM
1 mom liked this

Being new to the group this was one of the first posts I saw. In my opinion I think it’s being curious and in some cases they have a preconceived idea of how the child SHOULD end up and might be a bit surprised when it doesn’t turn out that way. I am Black but I am light skinned to where I could pass for biracial, and truth be told with my family genes I wouldn’t be shocked if somewhere down the line we had a few other things thrown in. I grew up being asked similar things; “What race are you?”,”Is your mom white?”,”Are you adopted?”. It gets to be very annoying because people have preconceived ideas of what “Black” is supposed to look like. Or in some cases what “biracial” is supposed to look like. My little girl is mixed; Black and Mexican and we get asked that every time someone sees her. She looks more Mexican then Black. And I get asked all the time “Are you sure they didn’t give you the wrong baby?” Of course my smart comment is, “Because I am oh so dark myself? The kid is only half a shade lighter than me!”So yes its rather stupid on many levels, both parents and strangers. Genes have a funny way of coming out and you can have two siblings with both the same parents and one looks like the moms side and the other the dads side. It’s just genes and we have no control over it.


Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN