Feel free to introduce yourselves and get settled in. My name is Ayla I am 37 years old and have 3 children ages 15, 13, and 3 years. As you may notice, there's a BIG gap in their ages. That's due to secondary infertility. I experienced my first ectopic pregnancy in 1996....it was horrible. I had no idea what was going on in my body and the doctors were criminally clueless. I was admitted to the hospital at the last minute, as my tube had begun to rupture and I was internally bleeding. I am lucky to be alive today. The doctor removed the pregnancy via laprascopic surgery, and was able to save my tube....which I sometimes wonder was more of a curse than a blessing. I had another ectopic in the same tube in August 2005...this time Methotrexate was used to dissolve the pregnancy and no surgery was required. Though it was less "invasive" I can honestly say that I preferred the surgery 100%. I will never allow myself to be injected with methotrexate AGAIN. Just this last week I found out I was pregnant again! We were shocked, thrilled and in awe. But when i started spotting and cramping, we immediately ran into the ER to make sure I wasn't Ectopic again. Well they told me I was, injected me with methotrexate, and 2 days later I found out that I had a perfectly normal intrauterine pregnancy, that was just a little too early to show on the first U/S. This is ALL very fresh and painful for me, as it occured last week. In fact I am still waiting to "Pass" what would have been a perfectly normal, enormously desired pregnancy that was conceived on my hubby's Birthday no less. I haven't slept in a week and am exhausted from crying.....*I* need a group as much as I think other women out there must need a group too. I have been through so many levels of shock ,disbelief, sadness, anger and rage, I don't even know what I'm thinking and feeling anymore as I sit and wait for a baby I wanted with all my heart and soul to "pass" because an overzealous ER doctor made a foolish mistake.. I just hope that I won't have to wait another 2 years to become pregnant again....or maybe even 10 years like the first time.
This is all so very fresh to me....I am so emotional. I will post more and more as I gather information, as my goal is to make sure this NEVER happens to another woman AGAIN. PERIOD. I will go to the ends of the earth and holler it from the hilltops. I am ready to take this all the way. But in the meantime I'd love to see you all settle in and start getting to know one another, Share your stories as much as you feel comfortable. We all need to know that someone understands our feelings. As I recover, you will see me on more and more. I have big plans for this group and beyond. So join me for the ride!
on Oct. 7, 2007 at 9:50 AM