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New mom at the end of her rope w/ sleep training:-)

Posted by on Jun. 9, 2009 at 12:34 PM
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Hello everyone,

I am a first-time mom of beautiful 6 month old baby boy named Julian. Things have been good in general...he's healthy and thriving and we got past the colic phase unscathed. But now I've gotten myself into quite a conundrum in that I've been co-sleeping and nursing him to sleep since birth and cannot seem to coax him into crib sleeping. I love co-sleeping with Julian, but am finding that I'm unable to get any rest while he's still waking every 1 to 2 hrs to nurse. On top of that, I can't get him to nap for any significant length of time without laying next to him.
I've been various methods of sleep-training for a couple weeks, but am getting really frustrated and exhausted as my efforts seem devoid of improvement.
On top of that, I feel horrible leaving him in his crib alone crying. It's just breaking my heart.
Does any one have any thoughts/ ideas?

Thanks so much:-)

Alicia
by on Jun. 9, 2009 at 12:34 PM
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Replies (1-9):
Apr1l
by on Jun. 23, 2009 at 12:47 PM

I have a 2month old that I'm co sleeping with and nursing kind of frequently at night (but he's still young so..)  but I'm about to try this method

I really hope it works, maybe you might want to try it?  GL to both of us

Haleylane
by on Jun. 23, 2009 at 3:43 PM

Im having the same problem. But my son is bottle fed. He will sleep throught the night but getting him to sleep at night or a nap is soooo hard. When I do finaly get him asleep he wakes up when I lay him down. Last night it took me 2 hours of picking him back up and getting him back asleep and laying him down and he'd wake up and I'd pick him back and so on and so on. He will only sleep for 30min during the day and wakes up cranky and tired. He will sleep just fine if hes sleeping with me.

I'm gonna try that method and see if it helps. But my hubby is gone a lot because he travels for a living and I'm here alone. I know its an attachment thing but I am so tired of fighting with him to sleep. Now I have tried to let him cry himself to sleep and he cried for an hours and he wasnt' letting up. And everytime I left the room he got even more mad and when I came back in and he saw me he got even more mad again. Ugh!

nhgirl72
by on Jun. 23, 2009 at 9:50 PM

I would try the method the previous mom posted - I read a book called the Lull-a-baby sleep plan which sound the same - "controlled crying" - you let them cry - but you're there w/them - so not abandoning etc....but that plan (the book) states that this method only works during the "window of opportunity" - which 'closes' at 7 months - and by the time I read it my daughter was almost 10 mos - so...I mention this only to say - if you try the above method - I'd do it NOW - before you get into the next stage w/separation anxiety etc. at which point I think it will get even harder. 

just my 2 cents - good luck

LIsa

rmcquown
by on Jun. 24, 2009 at 6:58 AM

yes i agree do it now! my son is almost 9 montsh. and im at the end of my rope. im a stay at home mom which helps me get through it though! its easier to deal with then when i worked. i've let him scream but it breaks my heart. he was born with a few birth defects so we've been through alot with him and i feeeeel so bad for what hes been put through. that i hate leaving him ever! including letting him scream during the day when i leave the room. he wants to be carried everywhere with me which is getting awful! dont let it get that bad believe me! the older they get the worse they can scream also. its a blood curling scream

pixiemom78
by on Jun. 24, 2009 at 7:23 AM

Try the book "The No Cry Sleep Solution", she has some great tips for breastfeeding and co-sleeping moms.


One thing I've learned with to be true with both my kids... Problems only get worse/harder to fix the older they get. DS woke up every 2 hours at night until he was 11 months old b/c I was waiting for him to outgrow the "phase" he was in, lol!


A 6 month old breastfed baby will probably wake up every 4-6 hours to breastfeed. Maybe putting him in a pack n play in your room, just not have him in bed with you, will help him learn to sleep on his own a little better.


StephanieF2
by on Jun. 24, 2009 at 2:55 PM

Good books are:

- Elizabeth Pantley, "The No Cry Sleep Solution"  (recommended by a prior poster, too)

- Jodi Mindell, "Sleeping Through the Night"

Both books are very good and an easy read. 

Main thing you need to remember is to be consistent.  Consistency is key, no matter what method you try.  Pick out a method, make a plan and stick too it. (Spoken from experience.  A LOT of experience with sleep issues.)

Good Luck!

Stephanie

 

CamrensMom08
by on Jun. 24, 2009 at 6:21 PM

I am having the same problem with my son who is 16 months.. he will not sleep by himself for any real length of time without waking up to make nsure either me or his dad his there.... any ideas on how to get him to sleep alone???

StephanieF2
by on Jun. 25, 2009 at 12:48 PM


Quoting CamrensMom08:

I am having the same problem with my son who is 16 months.. he will not sleep by himself for any real length of time without waking up to make nsure either me or his dad his there.... any ideas on how to get him to sleep alone???


The key is to have him fall asleep on his own.  How is he currently falling asleep?

leahjoy
by Group Admin on Jun. 25, 2009 at 2:08 PM

I agree that moving him to his own crib or a crib or pack-n-play in your room may help him to wake less often.  There are ways of getting him to sleep on his own without simply letting him cry it out, so take heart! Check out some of the books the other moms recommended, as well as the books in our "book recommendations" sticky post.

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