Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How do you plan to talk to your kids about sex?

Posted by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 10:40 AM
  • 8 Replies

I was thinking about this one last night...

I've told myself that I want to be open and non judgemental about sex. I did it as a teen, so what makes me think mine won't? I want my kids to come to me and tell me when they feel they are ready and I promise that I won't be mad or yell or judge. I just want to protect them. I don't mind providing contraceptives to my children because I'd rather them do it and I know and I know they're safe than not knowing until one day my son tells me he got a girl pregnant or has an STD.

Now, I was 14 when I lost my virginity. I soooo wish I waited until I was older and more mature. I think 14 is WAYYYY too young, and I was a totally different person at 14 than I am now at 22, and sometimes it makes me feel kind of gross, because I look at a 14 year old now and think "you're just a baby!!!" Should I be honest with my son if he ever asks me how old I was when I started having sex? I'm afraid that if I tell him how old I was, he'll feel free to make the same bad judgment I did. (My son's only 2 1/2 so I have a few years to go before this conversation happens, but I think it's a good topic all the same) What do you guys think?

by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 10:40 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-8):
KBix
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 10:43 AM

My husband says middle school because that is the first time he will actually start noticing girls in a more sexual way. But we want to prepare him for high school.








 




 
TempestRayne
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 10:47 AM

Be open, but explain why you were too young.

Domzmom2005
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 10:51 AM

Can't I just go off into la-la land and believe that my kids are never going to have sex??? good


Yea I know that'll never happen...so when the time comes I'll be open and honest about it. My parents never had "the talk" with me besides 'DON'T DO IT!' so I never knew what it was all about except what I learned from my sister (one of the worst role models ever by the way)

I will let them know that having sex just for the sake of having sex isn't all it's cracked up to be. I'll tell them they should wait until they find someone they truly care about that feels the same way for them and then decide when they are both ready to have safe sex.

Of course if they have random sex I won't judge (the whole he who is without sins shall cast the first stone thing...yea I have NO right to cast any stones) will I be happy about it? no, but I will encourage them to learn from my mistakes and not go that route.

baby

baby


mikeyjavimami21
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 11:01 AM

We don't have any plans other than giving them condoms starting around 13 (SO's age when he lost "it"). I def. know I will tell them here is the condoms, use them, bring a chick home pregnant or get an std your ass is grass!

On the other hand, I do want them to know that (all 3 boys btw) sex just for sex isn't as good as when it means something. I started at 14 also, and it took years for it to actually feel good, like 5ish, lol.

Most of it will depend on their maturity and where they are in puberty and maturing and all that as far as how in depth we will talk about it.

RyansMommy6407
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 11:12 AM

That sucks, it only took about 2 or 3 trys for it to feel good for me. lol

Quoting mikeyjavimami21:

We don't have any plans other than giving them condoms starting around 13 (SO's age when he lost "it"). I def. know I will tell them here is the condoms, use them, bring a chick home pregnant or get an std your ass is grass!

On the other hand, I do want them to know that (all 3 boys btw) sex just for sex isn't as good as when it means something. I started at 14 also, and it took years for it to actually feel good, like 5ish, lol.

Most of it will depend on their maturity and where they are in puberty and maturing and all that as far as how in depth we will talk about it.


JMKristy
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 11:18 AM

Ohhh!!! Good question! I'm going to watch this post closely! My sons are 9 1/2 and 6 1/2... We have never had anofficial sex talk with my oldest, but are preparing to do so.... He does know what it is.... thanks other kids and tv!!!!! LOL!!!! He has asked questions before, and we are always honest and open, but never answer more than what he has asked... usually they are just quick questions with quick answers, and that satisfies him. But the other night the news was on... they were covering a rape story... he asked me what rape was... immediately i took a bite of my dessert and thought, it was my snickers commercial moment! LOL! So I gave him the short honest answer... but I told hubby about this, and we have decided that it's time... maybe not with full detail, but most definitely time to discuss the topic a little further with him. I am a firm believer in being open and honest with the kids. And I feel the earlier you start with the harder topics, the easier it will be to discuss in the future, when they are older and you really need to be able to talk about it!

anabama
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 11:30 AM

I think it important to be honest with your kids about it and not be embarassed about it. My mom handed me a book and blushing the whole time mumbled something about if I have any questions I can ask. But she was so embarassed just handing me the book I never would have been able to go to her. Thankfully I had a friend whose mom was awesome. I was at her house all the time and able to talk to her, but I wished I could talk to my own mom. I have 3 girls and while I am DREADING the day they are old enough for this. I want them to know that we can talk about anything and that I will love them no matter what mistakes they make. I hope to instill my beliefs and values in them. I will strongly encourage that they wait for marriage. What bettter way to test a guy who says he loves you than to not sleep with him? I want to make sure they understand that they and whatever guy they are interested in are still growing and changing mentally and emotionally and that any relationship they form as a teenager is more than likely temporary. And that their body is a gift that can be given only once so they need to make sure it is given to the right man. 

Ashley
GenevieveD
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 11:57 AM

Pepper is 7 and we’ve already has a couple talks with her about it. She understands how it works and we answer questions honestly if she has them. She was actually pretty clinical about it and then grossed out lol


Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)