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comments sugestions?

Posted by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 4:19 PM
  • 7 Replies

I'm 25 and my hubby will be 26 next month we had our first home built last summer through Allen Edwin and move moved in in july. We have a almost 3 year old daughter and I'm 19 weeks with my second girl. Ok now that i have given background here is my problem.. for about a month now hubby has been depressed of course he wont admit it but u know when u man i unhappy ya know. I cant really get him to take about it but i did get him to once and he says that he just feels a lil unhappy about our money situation. We really not in bad shpe for ourt age and everything  that we are blessed to have but he works a lot of hours, and he basically feels like all he does is work and he has no life and i'm a stay at home mom we pretty much live paycheck to paycheck so it is tight but totaly doable.. IMO we are very lucky! about a week about i worked out our bills and found that we could really afford for him to get a motorcycle which is something that he had really wanted to do since he sold his old one when he was like 19. so we did it he picked it out and purchased it and i really thought that this would help him to feel a lil happy to have something for himself .. I was wrong nothing has changed when i talk to him at work he just sound miserable when is at him i can see that he is miserable an i'm not sure what i should do about. I'm starting to feel down too and i was totally fine but seeing him that way makes me that way too i just wanted him to understand that it could be a lot worse and we have a lot to look forward too for example the newest member of our family. I try to explain that everyone struggles in the beginning of starting a family.. Its expensive but worth it mind u he was the one  back inaug that wanted to start trying for our second. part of me is really mad at him right now because i want to be happy and enjoy our blessings but its hard to do when ur other half sound like he wants to jump off a bridge every time i talk to him.. so suggestion or comments???

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by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 4:19 PM
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Replies (1-7):
seth.ethan225
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 4:26 PM

My husband is the same way. We have everything we need but he is unhappy, not because he wants more but he feels like we ( me and kids) deservemore. He have swings where he is content and others where he is disappointed. It just happens- hang in their- I am pregnant to and every time I have been he has been more emotional then me...

TanyaMichelle
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 5:43 PM

Well it may be a deeper issue. You might want to try to get him to see his Dr. Maybe the Dr can give him something to help. Or maybe he doesn't want to burden you with how he feels so he doesn't want to talk about it. If that's the case see if he won't talk to a therapist about it. Typically guys won't do either one of those 2 suggestions but its worth a try to ask him. Let him know how concerned you are and how its making you feel and maybe he will consider it.

BiloxiDreams
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 6:02 PM

 Have you thought about downsizing?  Maybe getting an older home so he didn't have to work so much and/or ya'll could have more money to go on family vacations? 

xxLukesMamaxx
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 6:02 PM

ya that's a tough one. It's to bad people stress themselves out over money to the point they are miserable. If you have enough to get by then just enjoy each other! That's what I say! Maybe he should see a therapist or something. Maybe it would help for him to talk to some one? Sorry you have to go through that, I know it's hard to live with someone who is unhappy all the time : ( HUGS!!!!

pnkkittn24
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 7:16 PM


Quoting BiloxiDreams:

 Have you thought about downsizing?  Maybe getting an older home so he didn't have to work so much and/or ya'll could have more money to go on family vacations? 

we actually pay less for our morgage than we did in rent for our apartment, i realize building soulds super expencive but it was actually saved us money. and we do usually go on on week long vaca a year.

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JenniL05
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 7:20 PM

Is he unhappy with his job? That can weigh a lot on a person. Have you suggested couples counseling with him, or even counseling for himself. Does he have anyone to talk to? Just remember to make sure he knows you're there for him, which it sounds like you are. Good luck.

Manda046
by on Apr. 1, 2010 at 7:28 PM

This may seem silly. My husband has a hard time talking to me when he is upset or depressed. If he has something on his mind, and I can tell its upsetting him. I wait until he is in the other room and we txt! haha  The majority of the time he will fess up. I guess he feels better not facing me when he thinks he might upset me.  Then once we have "talked" through txt he is open to talk to me about it face to face.  It works for us!

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