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Fall in love again.UPDATED 8(

Posted by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 6:14 PM
  • 15 Replies

So, me and my SO have been together for 2 years. Its been really rough, we lost a baby last year and then found out 6 months later we were expecting again. Our pregnancies have been VERY hard and took a major toll on our relationship. Ive been miserable and I guess ive cant blaame him but hes fallen out of love with me. I am still very much in love with him though, and I dont know what to do. He is a father to my son from a previous relationship and hes great. Im really torn apart at the thought of losing him and id do anything I can to get him to fall back in love with me again. I know I sound like a loser and pathetic prolly lol but I really need advice and suggestions. Anybody have any?

UPDATE: SO TODAY HE MADE IT CLEAR THAT HE DOESNT WANT TO WORK THINGS OUT. I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO AT THIS POINT. I HAVE NO INCOME OR ANYTHING, I GAVE UP MY WHOLE LIFE TO BE WITH HIM AND HAVE A CHILD FOR US. MY TWO CHILDREN WHO ARE 5 AND 7 ARE NOT HIS BIOLOGICAL CHILDREN, MY DAUGHTER HAS A WONDERFUL DAD, AND MY SONS DAD IS A SEX OFFENDER. I HAVE NO FAMILY, MY SON IS SPECIAL NEEDS..HE HAS A MENTAL DISEASE. I DON TKNOW WHAT TO DO, IM SO SCARED OF WHAT THE FUTURE HOLDS FOR ME AND MY KIDS. HES TAKING MY UNBORN SON FROM ME WHEN HES BORN BECAUSE I CANT PROVIDE FOR HIM. IM SO LOST. I DON TTHINK IVE EVER FELT THIS LOW AND ALONE IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. I KNOW I NEED TO STAY STRONG BUT ITS SO HARD.
embarrassed

by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 6:14 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Mrs.Murray27
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 6:17 PM

*hugs mama* I'm sorry! I don't really know what to say but im gunna give you a BUMP! 

prinzesa_edith
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 6:21 PM
Well I don't really have a fail proof advice, but maybe you could try cooking dinner one night, putting the baby to bed early, dressing up sexy and when he gets home greet him at the door with a big smile a hug and a kiss. Have him sit down and take his shoes off. Tell him to relax a little while you finish off in the kitchen. After dinner get cozy with a back rub and just open your heart in the sweetest way possible. Also, start beeing more happy and posative every day, if he sees your positivity he will want to be around you. People want to be around someone who is always happy not angry or sad. Love yourslef and he will love you. And treat him how you would like him to treat you, at first it will catch him off gaurd but little by little he will like it and start treating you the same way
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kyuteangl88
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 6:27 PM

i always do little things for my SO, hiding notes for him, texting him random things that i love about him, even just doing my makeup or hair differently...

mom2twins9909
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 6:29 PM


Quoting Mrs.Murray27:

*hugs mama* I'm sorry! I don't really know what to say but im gunna give you a BUMP! 


luvhubandbabys
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 6:51 PM
U guys have been thru a lot....it can probably be worked thru... start slow watch a movie together, dinner etc after Ur son is asleep. My dh and I do yoga together obviously while pregnant might be hard..... but u get the idea...
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daydaynjr143
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 7:52 PM

Lol im big prego so the whole dressing up sexy thing wouldnt really work out too well right now lol but all youre other ideas are great. I totally think the whole positivty thing is important, ive been really depressive and miserable lately and we all know misery doesnt like company. Its so hard. He says he sees me trying really hard, but he says he knows it wont last. Im barely 23, hes almost 29. Hes my first "real" relationship, but he was with the same girl for 11 years prior to me. We got together in the midst of their divorce. Im still learning things about being a good "wife". Thanks to everyone for your advice. It really does help, especially from experienced wives. Ill be cooking everyday, keeping the house spotless at all times, and trying to make him feel as taken care of and loved as much as possible. I hope it works, and I hope he will stop rejecting me. The funny thing is, he doesnt want to be together, but doesnt want me to move out. Ughhh men lol

Quoting prinzesa_edith:

Well I don't really have a fail proof advice, but maybe you could try cooking dinner one night, putting the baby to bed early, dressing up sexy and when he gets home greet him at the door with a big smile a hug and a kiss. Have him sit down and take his shoes off. Tell him to relax a little while you finish off in the kitchen. After dinner get cozy with a back rub and just open your heart in the sweetest way possible. Also, start beeing more happy and posative every day, if he sees your positivity he will want to be around you. People want to be around someone who is always happy not angry or sad. Love yourslef and he will love you. And treat him how you would like him to treat you, at first it will catch him off gaurd but little by little he will like it and start treating you the same way


daydaynjr143
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 7:56 PM

He goes to sleep at like 8pm lol, right when my son does. He works long 12 hour days as a supervisor in construction. If I werent pregnant thatd be a great idea, since ive been pg he quit going to the gym and used to be huge into fitness. If wed work things out, going to the gym would something great for us to do together after the baby arrives...I think hed like that more to be his "quiet" time though. Maybe ill show interest in fitness and ask him for some tips and if he can help me, im sure thatd make him feel good.


Quoting luvhubandbabys:

U guys have been thru a lot....it can probably be worked thru... start slow watch a movie together, dinner etc after Ur son is asleep. My dh and I do yoga together obviously while pregnant might be hard..... but u get the idea...


o0MissMary0o
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 7:56 PM

I went through the same kinda thing and then realized I didn't even like myself and that's where the problem started. Gotta make yourself happy before you can make someone else happy.

daydaynjr143
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 8:05 PM

I know,  and ive been so miserable with myself while pregnant. I went from a cutesie 118lbs to almost 190lbs.Its really taken a toll on my self esteem. I know I need to work on myself, ive realized so many things about what ive done wrong throughout relationship since ive been faced with losing everything.  I had a great career in the legal field, and was attending a highly looked upon university here in New Orleans prior to being pregnant. But when we found out the baby was coming I quit my job, and took a extended break from school because we didnt want anything to cause me stress after losing our last baby. I kinda have felt useless and like im not the person I want to be. Ive also NEVER been a stay at home mom. So that transition was really tough. Ive never posted in this group before, just kinda lurked, but you guys are really nice!

Quoting o0MissMary0o:

I went through the same kinda thing and then realized I didn't even like myself and that's where the problem started. Gotta make yourself happy before you can make someone else happy.


meka26
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 8:20 PM

BUMP

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