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This might be immature, but its how I feel.

Posted by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 1:43 PM
  • 10 Replies

My sister and I don't speak. Not since I told her I wanted a more 'sisterly' relationship and she thought I was saying she's a shitty sister, a shitty aunt and she told me that she didn't wanna be either one anymore and to leave her and her family alone.

She has no interest in repairing anything, no matter what I say or do and its been about a year now. Its torn apart our family as a whole and my 18mo dd doesn't know her cousins on my side who are 12 and nearly 7. That hurts me cause I used to have a great relationship with them.

My neice has a cell but doesn't return calls/texts like she used to. I might chalk this up to her being a 12yo but I've always been the person she came to with drama at school, boys, anything. So to be completely cut out seems all too convenient. I have a sneaking suspicion my sister has been saying things to her kids about me. I know my neice shares texts about me to my sister since all this happened last year. It seems probable that given my sisters bitchy nature and mean spirit she would retort with snotty comments about me. Nothing too bad, but definitely planting little seeds in their heads.

My mom and step dad came over a week or two ago and were showing my DD pictures of my neice and nephew and telling her who they are. My little girl is very sweet and smart and picked up on the names quickly. Well now she's asking about them almost everyday and handing me a phone saying 'talk Kylie'. This just breaks my heart. I texted this to my neice who never responded. This is a girl who's CONSTANTLY on her phone so I know she at least received it. Idk. I know its dumb, but I'm hurt by all this. About my sister, now about my neice acting shady. And what about when my daughter gets a year or two older and REALLY starts asking questions??? What do I do?!

Ugh. This is killing me. I'm so angry. My sister is such a bitch!

by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 1:43 PM
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Replies (1-10):
TempestRayne
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 1:47 PM
I am sorry.
KenzieQsMommy
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 1:49 PM

Sorry about all the mistakes. I think I fixed them. Ugh my head hurts from this mess.

SavannahNoah
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 1:52 PM

Same thing happened with me and my sister. I didn't know what to do myself, so I can't help you. I just kept my mouth shut. I was pregnant with my twins, and she would occasionally ask my mother stuff about us. When I had them, I told my mother if my sister wanted to come see the babies, she could. We started talking after that and its been good. Maybe just time will heal it all? Or contact your sister, and ask if you could meet up for lunch or something, sit her down and tell her how this is making you feel. Hope your relationship gets better soon.

KenzieQsMommy
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 1:56 PM


Quoting SavannahNoah:

Same thing happened with me and my sister. I didn't know what to do myself, so I can't help you. I just kept my mouth shut. I was pregnant with my twins, and she would occasionally ask my mother stuff about us. When I had them, I told my mother if my sister wanted to come see the babies, she could. We started talking after that and its been good. Maybe just time will heal it all? Or contact your sister, and ask if you could meet up for lunch or something, sit her down and tell her how this is making you feel. Hope your relationship gets better soon.


Thanks. I;m glad your relationship is getting better!! I've tried contacting her several times. Its always met by ugliness and telling me to never contact her again. We got into another spat while I was pregnant with DD but when she was born she came to the hospital and all seemed okay. Then 6 months later it exploded again.

CuSukha
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 1:57 PM

I don't know don't talk about them? Or just say they are far away. DD has 2 cousins one for my sister and one from SIL. She has played with SIL's daughter more then my sister's daughter but she doesn't know her name or ask about her because SIL and I no longer talk. She asks for my sisters daughter all the time despite only really playing with her over a year ago. They both live across the country so not much I can do about her seeing them.

KenzieQsMommy
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 2:00 PM

I don't talk about them, for this very reason. I'm a little upset that my parents did because I avoided talking about them for this reason. I knew this would happen. Before I realized what they were doing the damage was done. It sucks. It hurts me too that she doesn't see them. She has one cousin that lives on the other side of the country and we skype and go see them a few times a year so she asks about her often.

Shy_Dia
by Silver Member on Jul. 8, 2011 at 2:02 PM

 i agree with saying that they are too far away. DS has a brother and sister that he asks about constantly-- i'm not gonna shield him from that so on their bdays, we have a small celebration. even though he hasnt seen either in over 2 years. =( but whne he wants to see or talk with them, i tell him that they are too far away (not true- just 15 minutes) and that mommy doesnt know their number. only way for them to get a relationship, is when they are older and their guardians cant do anything about it. =(

SavannahNoah
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 2:03 PM

My son who is 3, would ask about his cousin quite often. It upset me so much, that I would take him to my mothers and drop him off to spend time with my sister and neice. It's not fair to the children. :(

Quoting KenzieQsMommy:


Quoting SavannahNoah:

Same thing happened with me and my sister. I didn't know what to do myself, so I can't help you. I just kept my mouth shut. I was pregnant with my twins, and she would occasionally ask my mother stuff about us. When I had them, I told my mother if my sister wanted to come see the babies, she could. We started talking after that and its been good. Maybe just time will heal it all? Or contact your sister, and ask if you could meet up for lunch or something, sit her down and tell her how this is making you feel. Hope your relationship gets better soon.


Thanks. I;m glad your relationship is getting better!! I've tried contacting her several times. Its always met by ugliness and telling me to never contact her again. We got into another spat while I was pregnant with DD but when she was born she came to the hospital and all seemed okay. Then 6 months later it exploded again.


KenzieQsMommy
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 2:12 PM


Quoting SavannahNoah:

My son who is 3, would ask about his cousin quite often. It upset me so much, that I would take him to my mothers and drop him off to spend time with my sister and neice. It's not fair to the children. :(

Quoting KenzieQsMommy:

 

Quoting SavannahNoah:

Same thing happened with me and my sister. I didn't know what to do myself, so I can't help you. I just kept my mouth shut. I was pregnant with my twins, and she would occasionally ask my mother stuff about us. When I had them, I told my mother if my sister wanted to come see the babies, she could. We started talking after that and its been good. Maybe just time will heal it all? Or contact your sister, and ask if you could meet up for lunch or something, sit her down and tell her how this is making you feel. Hope your relationship gets better soon.


Thanks. I;m glad your relationship is getting better!! I've tried contacting her several times. Its always met by ugliness and telling me to never contact her again. We got into another spat while I was pregnant with DD but when she was born she came to the hospital and all seemed okay. Then 6 months later it exploded again.

 

Its not and it makes me incredibly angry that my sister is acting this way. Maybe my daughter is better off not knowing her only biological aunt if that's how she is but the children don't deserve it and I know they think I had a kid and want nothing to do with them now cause even in the breif period after I had my DD and my neice was still talking to me my sister told me my neice felt that way and my neice admitted it too and  I tried my best to make an effort at making her feel more apart of my family and she acted like my daughter was a nuisance. I couldn't even talk about her. Tried to play that game and give her solo time and it didn't work. She was bratty toward me, for a while so I backed off completely. When she started middle school though she started calling me and stuff but my sister made it impossible to actually see her and at one point cut her phone off. Or at least that's what I was told. Then it was back on and I found out through my dad  and my neice is even more distant. And flat out ignores anything having to do with my kid. Ugh.

xxLukesMamaxx
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 2:22 PM
I'm sorry, that stinks. All you can do is keep trying to repair things. Sounds like your doing all you can do on your end. :(
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