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Should I tell him this bothers me/he's not doing it right?

Posted by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 9:18 PM
  • 7 Replies
I've been married for 3 1/2 yrs and dh has always helped with dishes. The thing is when he does them he usually does a crappy job, doesn't get all the grease out, doesn't wash the outside of glasses and pans, never puts anything away, doesn't wash the stove or counter or all the dishes. It's frusrating when I have to go back and redo some of them everytime. But I've never told him. My dad says I shouldn't but my sister says I should. What do you think?
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by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 9:18 PM
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Replies (1-7):
sojourner.
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 9:19 PM

 Can you do them together and show him, so it's not like an attack?

ms.sophsmom
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 9:20 PM
I think u shld or say "I'll do dishes if you don't mind getting the stove, counters and table clean." Outlines exactly wt u want while u pitch in too...
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Arya91Fire
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 9:21 PM

 you shoould talk about it, but find a way to where it doesn't seem like you're attacking him

danie24
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 9:24 PM
He's your husband!

If you can't talk to him about this then how will you ever discuss anything serious or important.

Your hsband is suppose to be your best friend. Tell him.
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sahm_of_rj
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 9:32 PM

 My DH does this too, and whenever I bring it up he takes it personal and thinks I'm trying to tell him how to do it, which leads to him not wanting to do it anymore.  The thing is that even if I have to clean a couple of extra dishes when I unload it, I don't wind up having to do nearly as much work as if I did the dishes.  So I don't complain 90% of the time.  BUT there is no reason you couldn't bring it up once to see how he feels about it.

I'd rather have the help and fix the little things, but I know that not all people are like that.  If you're the type of person that likes things to just get done right, the first time, then you might feel less stressed if you do the dishes and he does something else that will be helpful to you. 

ikesmommy200
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 9:41 PM
I have NO problem talking to him about important things. I just felt like (and my dad's logic too) that he makes an effort to help and I should just appreciate that much rather than nitpicking how he does them.

Usually I fine with that, too. But there are times when I spend more time cleaning up after him than it would have to do it myself in the first place, then it's rather frustrating.


Quoting danie24:

He's your husband!



If you can't talk to him about this then how will you ever discuss anything serious or important.



Your hsband is suppose to be your best friend. Tell him.

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Kaylawv2
by on Jul. 8, 2011 at 9:45 PM

 My dh does the same thing, and Ive mentioned it more than once. I just do the dishes and clean the kitchen now, its much easier.

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