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Not Jealous, Just Annoyed!! (PIOG)

Posted by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 8:44 AM
  • 43 Replies

This post is going to come off like I'm jealous, I'm sure of that b/c SO says I need to get over my jealousy/insecurity issues when this subject is brought up. With that being said, I can not... WE cannot go any damn where without running into something he's slept with, dated, fooled around with, or just hung out with!

SO is very upfront and honest with me. He feels like he needs to tell me everything b/c if not, I may hear from someone else and then I'll be pissed at him. So, when we or he runs into an "old friend," he feels the need to tell me. Example, we were grocery shopping, and a girl walked by, and I could tell by the smug look she gave me that she was an ex. He was like, "Do you want to know who that was?" I replied, "Let me guess, an ex?" He was like, "Yeah, she was my first." Ok, that was the first time! I let him know real quick I was not happy knowing that b/c I dont want to know who the hell he lost his virginity to! Then a girl moved into our apartment complex.. AN EX that his bestfriend happened to be dating/fooling around with at the time. We went to a bar not to long ago (date night for us b/c the in-laws kept our kids) and the damn bartender was an ex. We went on vacation 2 hours away. We go every year as a family, and the girl sitting by the pool was someone he'd slept with. Of course, he didnt tell me he slept with her b/c he'd by then learned his lesson. I asked him b/c she was rather large, and he's always come across like he'd never fool around with a big girl. We went to go pick up our daughter from school and walked by a girl and he felt the need to tell me that was an ex. I didnt see her. His mom brought over some clothes an ex of his gave her for our daughter. Oh, and we just found out one of his exes is a teacher at our daughter's school. These arent even all the encounters we've had with past girlfriends/flings.

Im not jealous of any of these girls. They may have gotten there first, but I'm here now. Everyone has a past and I know that. I just get tired of being reminded of his! This isnt even a vent about SO. I'm not mad at him b/c its not like he can help where his "old friends" pop up. Now he doesnt tell me details, he'll just say, "Look, I know you're not going to like this, but a girl I hung out with a couple of times said 'hello' today." I told him to only inform me if the "old friend" talks to him and to leave any details of their past out. The less I know, the better. If we walk passed a girl at the school, dont tell me! I do not want to know!

by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 8:44 AM
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Replies (1-10):
xo.MommyW.xo
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 8:46 AM
I dont have that problem.... Hubby didnt have sex with everyone he came across
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LEY1307
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 8:47 AM

I wouldn't want to know either. 

jenny1o1
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 8:54 AM

Wow.. I hope that's a small town!  lol  Just kidding.. most of us had our flings before we got married.  But I wouldn't want to know either.  Unless it was a serious girlfriend..

.Pagan.
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 8:55 AM

my husband is a super confident man....very alpha but when we go back to my hometown he has the same issues. its a fairly small town...not tiny but not big. i have however dated a LOT of guys and know almost everyone there in my age group and some that are older. last time we were home a guy i knew...did not date but he wanted to date me...was delivering somethings to a store we were at and stopped to talk to me. when i turned around my husband gave me 'the look' that i do not see often and he said 'so....did you sleep with him too?'. that hurt a tad bit and he apologised for it. he told me that he dislikes all the males around because he cant help but wonder 'did he sleep with her or mess around with her'. he knows that i am with him and don't want them but there is some territorial mark in him that it just irritates. so no i don't think you are wrong BUT the problem is as long as you live in the area you are in this will continue to happen. luckily for us we move often and only go back to my hometown abt 3 times a year . we still pop into ex's of mine but nearly as often. i am from GA but there were three in NC where we moved and 2 in CA thanks to the Marine Corps being a small group.

TaeTaeLove
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 8:55 AM
Wow... that's a lot of girls.
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DakotaHaley
by Member on Sep. 14, 2011 at 8:58 AM

I would feel the same way. For me it would be like I want to know, but really don't want to know.

CrysCyn527_7310
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 9:00 AM

I dont think he's slept with ALL of them, but his "number" is 13. I didnt even want to know that, but he just blurted it out in the begining of our relationship. I slept with 10 guys, including SO.

Quoting TaeTaeLove:

Wow... that's a lot of girls.


GirlWSlingshot
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 9:05 AM

We kind of have a similar issue because we have known each other for 10 years. We went to high school together, so I knew 95% of the girls he slept with/dated. It's only a problem if you make it one. Just try not to think about it. It's good that you set the parameters of how much you feel comfortable with him sharing.

rakismama
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 9:05 AM
Ya that's annoying. We have run into quite a bit of girls that my hubby was with before me also. I don't like it either. But at the sametime I do want to know, ya know. Lol
CrysCyn527_7310
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 9:07 AM

I know how your husband feels! We cant go anywhere without running into someone SO knows. If a girl stops to talk to him, it's so awkward b/c Idk if it's another girl from his past. We're not moving anytime soon, so I have to deal with it. I think he finally got the point b/c he hasnt pointed anyone out in awhile. This vent was brought on by him saying a girl, a teacher at my daughters school, stopped him & asked how he was doing. I always wondered why that girl always gave me mean look... Oh, well. 

Quoting .Pagan.:

my husband is a super confident man....very alpha but when we go back to my hometown he has the same issues. its a fairly small town...not tiny but not big. i have however dated a LOT of guys and know almost everyone there in my age group and some that are older. last time we were home a guy i knew...did not date but he wanted to date me...was delivering somethings to a store we were at and stopped to talk to me. when i turned around my husband gave me 'the look' that i do not see often and he said 'so....did you sleep with him too?'. that hurt a tad bit and he apologised for it. he told me that he dislikes all the males around because he cant help but wonder 'did he sleep with her or mess around with her'. he knows that i am with him and don't want them but there is some territorial mark in him that it just irritates. so no i don't think you are wrong BUT the problem is as long as you live in the area you are in this will continue to happen. luckily for us we move often and only go back to my hometown abt 3 times a year . we still pop into ex's of mine but nearly as often. i am from GA but there were three in NC where we moved and 2 in CA thanks to the Marine Corps being a small group.


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