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She told me to medicate my child......EDIT IN RED EDIT BLUE- I talked to teacher and...

Posted by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 11:51 AM
  • 34 Replies

Soo..My son is gifted(intelligence wise and there is a reason I am sharing this so bare with me please)

There are links associated with Gifted children with overly sensitive emotions(cries easy, feels a over whelming need to succeed)and compulsive talking..

Logan has both.. He throws fits at school IF he sees another child not following directions properly, messes up himself when following directions, or doesn't finish a assignment in the time frame given to him.

He IS in cousenling with the school I HAVE worked with the school AND teacher on improving and helping recognize and deal with his emotions.

I had a meeting WITH the school(principal included)on the 31st regarding speech issues and we DID discuss his behavior and everyone in the room said he has shown GREAT improvement and no further testing or any thing other was needed at the time.

My son threw a fit this morning and the counselor was out so the nurse dealt with it. She then calls me and says the following.

Hi, Mrs. Lenox, this is the nurse..Logan threw a fit today, the counselor was out but I calmed him down because my son was like this and he is gifted(24 and in college now)so I know how to deal with it.. I just wanted to ask, Is there anything going on at home I need to know about? O.o

Me- errr....no... I mean he doesn't have these types of fits at home, He is also in counseling at school and I as his parents have been working to help improve his problem

Her- Oh I know and he has shown GREAT improvement on his fits, have you tried taking him to the ped and getting him medicated...

Me-O.O uhhh.. the last time we did any type of testing(autism, ADHD etc)he tested fine

Her- oh I don't think he is autistic he seems a little OCD and has anxiety issues

(first off this OCD and anxiety ONLY happens at school FOR the reasons I listed above)

Me- well errr.. the last time he was at the ped, they said he was fine

her- well I don't know what your situation is financially or if you provide insurance

me- Yes all my kids are fully insured through my husband medical and dental

her-oh that's good..well legally im the only one who can suggest this

me- do I need to set up a meeting with the counselor and principal?

her- oh no no no..nothing like that.. Im just suggesting maybe you should talk to his ped and maybe look into medicating him. oh and if you decide maybe you need to talk about anything going on at home or need help at home just call me

...

Soooo.... what would YOUR reaction be?



Dh went and talked with her(the nurse) first off she did NOT say to him what she said to me.. lol he told her he wanted to get the info on what happened with Logan to prompt the phone call and the find out why she said he needed to be medicated because his wife(me) was upset and as parents we don't believe jumping to medication on a issue, especially one that has been improving WITHOUT meds, is the answer

soo she was all like, yes he is improving Ive been in the loop on every thing going on with him and meds may not be needed although they should be considered but maybe you should take him to a psychiatrist........

and then dh said, well I missed his last ARD meeting since I work nights and I know you are in the loop I mean what happened with that? Because I know meds weren't mentioned.,

to which she said, well I have been kept apprised of his issues but I dont know what was decided there I mean I know he sees the cousenlor but I dont know anything else...

uh huh

lol

soo what happened is Logan got in trouble yesterday for compulsive talking. I told him if it happened today he'd loose his gameboy for a week.

It happened and he freaked and kept screaming OH NO I AM OUT OF CHANCES YOU DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT GET ANY MORE CHANCES

which freaked his teacher out, she brought him to the nurse who apparently assumed being out of chances was something sinister which prompted her phone call and her comments on my home life..

From what I can piece together she talked to him AFTER talking to me and found out that being out of chances meant being grounded from his gameboy

soo she just ASSumed that hell i dont know what she ASSumed...

but, we let her know we are NOT medicating and that we will continue working with the school as long as he continues to improve and that is IT.

We are however revamping our technique on punishment...Because it's so black in white we have decided that rather than having him be punished(loose things like the gameboy)for bad behavior we are just going to try simply going to try use our marble system to give extra reward on good behavior..
Takes off the pressure IF he has a bad day, and will help him to try harder to have good days.


When I picked Logan up I asked his teacher what went on as far as his "fit" and explained to her what the nurse told me...

She was floored to say the least..she said he didnt even have a actual fit..

Logan has progressed to the point that they are able to recognize the signs and talk (they call it discussing feelings)

here is how it goes(and went today)

The teacher gives out treats as they progress on assignments as a form of encouragement..

Logan sometimes goes into lala land so he hadn't progressed far in the assignment. The teacher told him that she would come back and check in a minute and he started to get upset, so she told him her his feelings were important to her but since she was busy they would go to the counselor so he could talk about his feelings.. this is protocol we have implemented(myself and his school) because it is helping with emotional issues without disturbing call..

Sooo she said there was no crying and she talked with him on the way, they get to the office and the counselor wasnt there so he got upset(black and white with Logan, she isn't there he sees it as BAD)so the nurse heard and told her she would help and bring him back when he was calmer..

she brought him back said it went great but she did talk with me and that was it..

His teacher had NO idea the nurse said this to me and she felt the nurse over stepped her bounds and that she shouldn't have even suggested it because although she knows we have implemented things to help she is NOT in the loop as far as what we do with Logan..

SHE urged me to talk with her and the principal because she felt that even though I was ok after talking with her and even though I told her I wasnt there to start trouble I was just confused because I felt I was getting mixed messages, that we needed to address what happened with the principal.

So, I talked with her and I told her my main concerns where the implications that there were problems at home, I told her I felt that IF there were that surely in the 2yrs in counseling that would have leaked over, and this was the first time ANYONE had suggested there were concerns in my household.. She assured me that HAD there been concerns it WOULD have leaked over with counseling WELL before now and been addressed. She also said that while she can't legally(nurse can they cant)suggest meds she would NOT have told me we had no behavior issues to discuss last week if she felt otherwise, and that she felt the nurse REALLY misrepresented the school today and she hopes it doesnt cause me to loose confidence. They know Logan has been improving greatly the GT teacher(who is involved)is highly qualified and logan is a CLASSIC Gifted and talented case as far as his emotions...

I told her that while I was really upset at first I have calmed down and while I felt it needed to be addressed with his teacher I had no intentions of coming to her because I dont want them to think I am here to start trouble, I am here out of concern for my sons welfare because they know how involved I am with my kids and to be told he needed to be medicated made me feel like I was basically being lied to on his progression..

anywho she apologized(over and over)on behalf of the school and insured me that this would not happen again, she agrees it was handled VERY unprofessionally and that even if the nurse was trying to "help" she stepped outside her bounds:)

I am proud of how I handled.I did tell her I was so upset early that had my husband not insisted that I do NOT go in yet, heads would have rolled! LOL

Lusty Lenox

save the date

by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 11:51 AM
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Replies (1-10):
young_lv_mom
by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 11:55 AM
I think she gave her kid meds growing up and so she thinks its the best/only way to help/fix it. She was most likely trying just to be helpful, just couldn't word it right.
Gealach
by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 11:55 AM

I get it all the time too.

Hell I got it today.

My DD is super sensitive too. Someone on the bus called her "stupid" and she ran out of breakfast, into a classroom and they had to call me to come get her.


I always say, "No thanks, I prefer to parent my child than turn her into a zombie"

Its like the school nurses get a cut of money spend on Ritalin or something

sandraberke
by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 11:56 AM
Maybe shes just trying to be helpful?idk, what kinda of medication is she suggesting? im against medicating unless its nessisary.especially in kids.
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TheBabyFactory4
by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 11:57 AM
I would just take it as a "helpful" suggestion and move on. You are dealing with it and he's improving. So ignore her.
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prissypoptart
by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 12:14 PM
1 mom liked this
Girl. I'm so much against medication so my comment will be a touchy subject.

I would tell that bitch to fuck off..

:(
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thinkpink2012
by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 12:21 PM
I'm anti-meds too! I hate how schools want you to drug your children to make there days easier. When Bailian was in pre-k before I pulled him they suggested meds too and I flipped out!
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snb8604
by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 12:26 PM

 i personally think its a little rude that she even felt it was her place to suggest medication for your son. even if she is the school nurse, she doesnt know what is going on with your family all day every day.

PeaceMuch
by Kali on Feb. 8, 2012 at 12:29 PM

 yup

Quoting TheBabyFactory4:

I would just take it as a "helpful" suggestion and move on. You are dealing with it and he's improving. So ignore her.

 

StarryRain
by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 12:29 PM
Sigh.
Why is everyone so game to drug kids? !!
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2wardgirls
by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 12:31 PM



Quoting young_lv_mom:

I think she gave her kid meds growing up and so she thinks its the best/only way to help/fix it. She was most likely trying just to be helpful, just couldn't word it right.

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