What stupid things have YOUR men done that just made you facepalm???!!!
I remember one time I came home from work and my SO had been having a super lazy day. He was sprawled out on our huge ass bean bag couch (yes I said bean bag COUCH!) about to fall into a junk food induced coma when I walked in the door. He asked me if I could help him find his phone because he didn't know where it was. I was in a good mood so I said sure honey and proceeded to tear through our entire apartment for his stupid cell phone. He said he thought he might have left in the bedroom. It wasn't there. He said he might have left in the bathroom. It wasn't there. I started to get irritated and so did he because he was so damn sure his phone was somewhere and that I had missed it. As I was searching the kitchen, he asked if I had seen the TV remote. I was like honey I've been home for all of 10 minutes and I haven't even looked at the TV! Still in a good mood though, I kept my eyes out for the remote. After nearly 20 minutes of searching, I couldn't find either of them anywhere. My SO got annoyed and was like fine but if I get up and find either one of them, its your ass. He was being sarcastic but I knew he was irritated at having to postpone his coma. So he gets up off the couch and lo and behold...his stupid ass was sitting on BOTH!!!! Yeah...that happened *sigh*
that might be the funniest thing I've heard for a long time 
Quoting kaidansmylife:
Last night I fell asleep on the couch with the baby and didn't wake up til almost 2 this morning. He calls me today and asks why I never called him last might. So I told him. He then starts getting all assy and going on about how its not right for me to not call him since we have to be in seperate states and all sorts of nonsense. I waited patiently until he was finished then calmly ask "well why didn't you just call me?" And he says to me "because my phone was on silent and I couldn't find it" he had no answer when I asked him how he planned on talking to me if I had called without his phone. Lmao
My ex husband was very very dumb.
There were countless things he said and did and asked that were beyond ridiculous, and truly humiliating for me when we were in public.
One thing he asked my mom was, "Are they called Pall bearers because the first guy that ever died was named Paul?"
He was the worst driver too, he would consistently run red lights because he didn't look at them. He literally wouldn't look at the lights EVER. He looked at the cars next to him to see what they were doing, and very often they were in the left turning lane with a green f***ing arrow!!!
He would stop at green lights and go on red.
I'm so glad that imbecile is out of my life.
For me personally I found him to be physically intensely sexy (and apparently many other women did to, hint hint) and so I am pretty ashamed of myself for falling for him for only looks, even though he was dumb as dog shit lol.
Next man will be my intellectual equal.
Quoting JaggersMommy1:This.... he asked me if it looked good. All I could do was laugh and get a picture. He was very serious when he asked. Lol
Stacy and Clinton from "What Not To Wear" need to have a little talk with him.
My DH was getting his clothes out for work the next day and could not find his work jeans. He then proceeded to look all over the house...in the dryer, in the hamper, on the floor of the closet, under his bed, in the basement, even in his car (I don't even want to know the man logic behind that choice). Guess where they were? In his dresser, where they belonged the whole time. And he got mad at me for putting him there since he didn't think to look there first. Yep, sneaky me, I hid them WHERE THEY BELONG! Facepalm.
My hubby gets words stuck in his head and he says them periodically. We went to a Mexican restaurant one day and he saw an item on the menu, "pescado". He asked me what it meant and I told him it meant fish. He said the word through out our meal, not quite driving me crazy, but it was close. When it was time for us to check out, he walks up to the poor cashier, who is Hispanic, and says very loudly, "Pescado!"
The poor cashier asked, "What?"
Unfortunately, because I had already left due to the amount of laughter I was trying to stifle, he was left to explain why he had called her a fish in Spanish. It did not go well, from what I understand.
Quoting nokesmomof2:my hubby talkin on his cell phone and then wandering around like a mad person and then i finally asked him what are you lookin 4 and he said my cell phone and he already had it on his hand and was talkin on it lmao
okay, this is one of my favorited stories about my dh. he is a kind, thoughtful, generally considerate man. he would do anything for me, but honestly, sometimes he just doesn't think. years ago when our children were small, i had to have my gall bladder removed. the old fashioned way. i developed the flu while in the hospital,so i was in for over a week. i was discharged with several metal staples in my abdomen. needless to say i wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. dh took a week off to stay home with me and help me with the children (two girs, 18 mos and 3 yrs old) so there i am laying in my bed. dozing and in he comes and throws a tarp over me. i asked what he was doing. his reply? i'm scraping the ceiling, getting ready to redecorate this bedroom. he proceeded to scrap the wallpaper off the ceiling right onto my tarp covered stomach! eventually, i had a lovely wall papered bedroom. but not without a good laugh.
God help me if my son ever tells me he heard...
- LadyTsunade81
on Mar. 7, 2012 at 3:58 PM