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Women Are To Stay In Abusive Marriages! ummm wtf?!

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You have GOT to be freaking kidding me!!! I myself was in a very abusive relationship with my dd bio father, and this article really pissed me off! These Wisconsin law makers need to go back to the looney bin!


Wisconsin Lawmaker Says Women Should Stay in Abusive Marriages

By Lylah M. Alphonse, Senior Editor, Yahoo! Shine | Love + Sex – Fri, Mar 16, 2012 7:27 PM EDT

In Wisconsin -- yes, the same state where lawmakers have introduced a bill penalizing single mothers for being unmarried -- a Republican state representative has come out against divorce for any reason -- even domestic abuse.

Instead of leaving an abusive situation, women should try to remember the things they love about their husbands, Representative Don Pridemore said. "If they can re-find those reasons and get back to why they got married in the first place it might help," he told a local news station.

Pridemore -- who, coincidentally, is a co-sponsor of Republican state Senator Glenn Grothman's "being single causes child abuse" bill as well as a controversial voter ID bill that was ruled unconstitutional earlier this week -- also said that while he thinks women are capable of caring for a family "in certain situations," fathers are the only ones who provide structure and discipline. If they don't grow up with married biological parents, Pridemore says, "kids tend to go astray."

Grothman, for his part, continues to defend his controversial bill. Now, though, not only is single parenthood a factor in child abuse, women in particular are to blame for it.

"There's been a huge change over the last 30 years, and a lot of that change has been the choice of the women," Grothman said.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Mar. 19, 2012 at 11:25 PM
Replies (131-140):
TheMommaJessie
by Bronze Member on Mar. 21, 2012 at 9:10 AM

where in the hell do they get off telling women that their lives do not matter & that is exactly what they are saying with that bill. seems to me they are trying to take womens rights away and that is just wrong. I hope the women of Wisconsin stand up and tell these politicians to jump off a dang bridge idiotic men have no business being in politics.

Playitagain
by on Mar. 21, 2012 at 9:12 AM

Ive been in an abusive relationship it doesn't change ever. Im not a huge supporter of divorce I think way too many people jump into divorce too fast and dont try to work things out. One friend of mine told me "If it doesnt work we'll just get divorced, no biggie". I was raised you get divorced only as an absolute last resort, if your just "not happy" because marriage does take alot of work and believe me there have been time where Ive thought... boy Im just not happy right now. But its always gotton better.

However, in cases of abuse you should never stay with the guy, and guys should never stay with a women who is abusive either because Ive seen that also. Abuse, drug use, stealing the familys rent/ mortgage money, and cheasting those are my main divorce reasons. To say that women just need to work harder in abusive relationships thats how my great aunt was killed back in the 70s. She lived in a small town and everybody knew her husband beat her and had become the town drunk after a farming accident killed his brother. But the couple times my aunt tr ied to leave the town would convince her to go back to her "wifely duties" or lose all contact with her children who were also being abused. In the end he killed her I think with a shovel from the stories Ive been told.

MamaG14
by on Mar. 21, 2012 at 9:14 AM

First off, I completely and totally DIASAGREE with what these congressmen are trying to do-and it would never pass in Wisconsin; however, it may just be bait for conservative voters this election season (if they are running). 

Secondly, the fact that these old (probably white) men are in office, reflect the fact that the Power in our society has been held by elite white people. What white elite people constitute as sane and rational does not mean squat to the rest of us- they marry for money, they do stay in abusive relationships etc., the have controlled for most of US history what a MOTHER "should be". 

For centuries in our country (and throughout the world, still) single women have been penalized, their children "bastards", and with little monetary help from the country before the late 19th/20th century. 

This is just the legacy of our racist, sexist society, one which ultimately penalizes ANYone who isn't white and rich. This is what we have in store if we elect these lunatic conservatives....

etsmom
by on Mar. 21, 2012 at 9:14 AM
1 mom liked this

Wow, Just wow!  I wonder where are the woman's rights activists on this?  Why isn't there an uproar?  Why, oh WHY is there no outcry for female rights to health and dignity?  If there is a single woman in that state that thinks this is ok, she is betraying her sex and the hard work that all people fought for so that she could have equal rights.  We are not in the damned stone age!  A man cannot grab a club and take what he wants when he wants and expect all women to accept it!

boshs1andonly
by on Mar. 21, 2012 at 9:18 AM
1 mom liked this

I wasn't aware that the problem in abusive marriages is that the wives forgot why they love their husbands (Insert eye roll here). Anyone who believes this crap needs to be junk punched! I can't believe how some people's minds can be so warped. 

SarahsAMommy
by on Mar. 21, 2012 at 9:20 AM

OMG I'm so glad I don't live there. And he has no right to blame females for child abuse! This man needs out of power! If anything like this really happens, I hope he can sleep with the fact of women being beaten to death do to their husbands. Makes me think his wife wants to leave him cause he's abusive!!!

SarahsAMommy
by on Mar. 21, 2012 at 9:23 AM

omg I'm so sorry that happen :(

Quoting Playitagain:

Ive been in an abusive relationship it doesn't change ever. Im not a huge supporter of divorce I think way too many people jump into divorce too fast and dont try to work things out. One friend of mine told me "If it doesnt work we'll just get divorced, no biggie". I was raised you get divorced only as an absolute last resort, if your just "not happy" because marriage does take alot of work and believe me there have been time where Ive thought... boy Im just not happy right now. But its always gotton better.

However, in cases of abuse you should never stay with the guy, and guys should never stay with a women who is abusive either because Ive seen that also. Abuse, drug use, stealing the familys rent/ mortgage money, and cheasting those are my main divorce reasons. To say that women just need to work harder in abusive relationships thats how my great aunt was killed back in the 70s. She lived in a small town and everybody knew her husband beat her and had become the town drunk after a farming accident killed his brother. But the couple times my aunt tr ied to leave the town would convince her to go back to her "wifely duties" or lose all contact with her children who were also being abused. In the end he killed her I think with a shovel from the stories Ive been told.


jessicasmom1
by on Mar. 21, 2012 at 9:23 AM

crazy! I don't think anyone should have to deal with abuse.

coonsblessed
by on Mar. 21, 2012 at 9:31 AM
1 mom liked this

Obviously they don't want the women to be abused.  The couple (especially husband) should seek counsiling.  It does work.  My husband used to be abusive; for the first 3 years of our marriage.  We sought counsiling (much to my husband's dismay), at cousiling I told the truth and he was forced to deal with it.  We're now going on 10 years, we've got 2 kids now and we are for the most part what I feel is the "ideal couple" (no ones perfect, but there's no more abuse).  That's why they are told to focus on why the fell in love in the first place, so they can care enough to seek help.  Having said that I do not believe that all problems can be fixed through counsiling, some should have been fixed years ago and have been left to fester until it really is too late in most people eyes, but on the flip side ppl are too quick to divorce instead of facing a problem head-on.  Do I think its the woman's fault; absolutely not, he went too far with that statement, but , I feel that too few look at the part of the vows that state "or worse".  They think if they're spouse isn't perfect that they need to just leave.  I say work on it. (Btw I come from a broken home where both parents were abusive to each other; the father physically, the mother verbally so I'm not just pulling this out of my backside).

bethgoedeken
by Member on Mar. 21, 2012 at 9:40 AM

This is so fucked up! I really hope he gets voted out next term.

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