i had an amazing weekend. i'm sure i'll be bashed, but whatever.
so this weekend was amazing.
my car broke down on tuesday, so i took it to the shop to get fixed, and wasnt supposed to get it back til next tuesday, but it was ready friday. so i had it back for this weekend, which was awesome cuz the weather was amazingg<3
well, saturday was an emotional day. me and mike put all our shit out on the table. his shit, my shit, our shit. we just came clean about everything we expect from this relationship, where we stand, the mistakes we've both made, what we will do to work on it, and even if our relationship is worth saving. it was like a six hour conversation...all over the phone. i was up til almost 7 in the morning talking to him about it. we decided we would get together the next day (today) to see each other, and decide where to take it from here. so we did.
the kids went to my moms house, so we spent the day out. we pretended it was our "first date" just to see if there were any feelings left. so thats what we did. we went out around 11, and didnt come home til like 6ish?
he took me out to lunch at my favorite place, and then we walked around the mall. i ended up spending wayyy to much money all on myself! lol. scored me 115 bucks worth of new undies & bras...and got a few new pairs of pants (i went down two sizes!)
it was just a great day. it felt so good just to feel recharged, and just "start over". we just dont wanna talk about the stupid past anymore. its killing me. and its killing him. hes not a bad guy...just unmotivated. i just am getting impatient, but hes working on it.
we just spent the day giggling, holding hands, and just spending time with each other. i needed this. we needed this. maybe after all, i do have some fight left in me for him. and maybe hes got enough fight left in him for me. i'm in love with him, i cant help it. the thought of even holding any other guys hand just doesnt seem right to me. i cant stomach to even think about him with anyone else. i just want this to work. no matter what it takes. my children deserve us to work it out. they deserve a happy home, and i will fight tooth and nail to keep it that way. (he has decided this too. its going to take alot of hard work, and alot of frustration, but i know we can get through this.)
i'm going to bed happy tonight. for the first time in a while.
bash if you must, but you cant ruin my parade.