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What should I do?? I need some advice

Posted by on Jun. 17, 2012 at 10:56 PM
  • 6 Replies

I'm 21 and 5months pregnant with my first child, a boy :)  I currently live with my granparents in Minnesota but I'm trying to get an apartment here because this house is too small and I don't get along with my Grandmother BUT I also have the option of moving to Georgia where my bf is... but I'm hesitant because I have no family out there, nor have I ever met anyone from his family and we have been in a long distance relationship for the past 3 years. We've never spent more than a week together. He's a great guy and I know he's going to be a great father but he does have a crimal backround and he's done some pretty sketchy things in the past, but he has also cleaned up his act a lot and has a job & goes to school. So I guess what I'm asking is should I stay in MN where most of my family lives, but they are all pretty undependable or go to Georgia to be with my sons father & raise our family together and give him a chance???

by on Jun. 17, 2012 at 10:56 PM
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Replies (1-6):
gacgbaker
by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 6:15 AM

That's a tough decision to make- I guess I wouldn't personally move unless he was ready to marry me and make that commitment.  Good luck with the decision, I'm sure it's hard!


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BrownEyedGirl86
by Silver Member on Jun. 18, 2012 at 6:23 AM
Personally I would move but I would be a bit apprehensive about it but I would want to give it a shot for my child.
I mean I would want to give my child a chance w both parents in the same home. I'd get a job so just in case somethig happens I could move back home. I would also speak to him about it maybe see if he would move up by you first and if not speak to him about your concerns

Best of luck
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Sunivondea
by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 6:26 AM
I know it's scary being a new mom and nor knowing for sure that your going to have that support net to fall on, but... I feel like this is something that's worth taking a risk for. If you do move and things don't work out with you and bd you learn how to make it alone. It's like being thrown into the water before you know how to swim. You swim to shore or you drown. How determined are you to stat alive?

(I'm in love with adventure, my answer is always 'go for it.')
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Reina13
by Silver Member on Jun. 18, 2012 at 10:47 AM

I agree. I wouldnt uproot my life and leave my support system behind unless I was absolutely sure and had the committment of marriage in our relationship.

Quoting gacgbaker:

That's a tough decision to make- I guess I wouldn't personally move unless he was ready to marry me and make that commitment.  Good luck with the decision, I'm sure it's hard!


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LovemyZay12
by on Jun. 18, 2012 at 11:32 AM

He does want to marry me, but I'm just not ready for that commitment right now. And as for him moving here, we have talked about it but I live in a very small town with very little opportunites for jobs. The town I live in also happens to be a bit racist & he is african american which is another reason I want to move.  I don't want to raise my son in an environment where people will judge him based on the color of his skin. I don't want to make a rushed decision but I have to make one before my little man is born. 

jazzylady88
by on Jun. 20, 2012 at 1:33 PM

i think if hes willing to commit to you full force you should def give the family life a try. Living that far away from his child is gunna be hard. Youll want him around on a daily once the baby is here. Not only for you but for the baby to bond. Well good luck! 

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