If so, how often? Does he know his limit?
If he has one too many does he get out of control? Does he get angry? Feelings easily hurt?
My husband drinks, not every day. A few times a week, and if he has the entire weekend off he drinks almost all weekend. He doesn't know his limit. He tends to get loud, a little more hyper than usual. Which I know is normal. But he also from time to time gets aggravated easily, his feelings are hurt easily. Mainly when he wants to get 'friendly' (and he's drunk) and I don't want to do anything. He becomes pushy and all over me when he gets that way. I don't like that one bit. Then he gets mad and says that I don't love him etc. Every time he gets drunk he asks me if I love him, when I say I do, he says 'no you don't' sarcastically. I say it again and he's always like 'you better'.
I've seen him get really angry 4 times since we've been married. 3 out of 4 of them he was in a fight, with either family or friend. Then when I don't take his side (I dont condone fighting especially if he gets cocky and starts running his mouth), He gets pissed at me and starts on me. Trying to tear me down for everything that he can. Now, mind you I don't sit and tell him that he's wrong or try to make a fool of him, he's already doing that himself. But I dont talk to him like he's a child, and that's what he expects me to do.
We always butt heads because I dont put up with the shit he's saying. He is a re presser. Alcohol is his courage, literally. So anything he's been thinking and not talking to me about, he lets it out. It usually turns into that. Putting me down, threatening to take the kids, accusing me of sitting on my ass all day while he's at work (i'm a sahm), that I dont love him, that he thinks i'm probably already looking for someone (which I am not) and that he will take everything from me.
When he's sober I talk to him about it a few days afterwards. It's the same story. He feels underappreciated (as do I), and that he's sorry, he will never do it again. Things wont get that way again. I've heard that since the 1st day that we were married. First time I ever seen it was on our honeymoon. Go figure.
I don't give up that easily. Nor do I plan on. I love my husband very much. But his father in his younger days was an alcoholic, very tempramental, short fuse, abusive to my husbands mother, a cheater, liar, and a dangerous man. He always had a gun or a weapon of some sort with him. And when my husband gets aggravated while drunk that is the first thing he asks 'where's my gun, i need my gun' ( i wont let him carry it for that reason). I am just afraid that since alcoholism is usually a trait that is passed down through generations, that my husband will turn out like his father. His dad isnt like that now, far from it. But he used to be.
I'm just not sure how to handle it sometimes. Any suggestions or similar stories?