I never thought I would be posting this...UPDATEinRED

[lyricsmommy347]

*UPDATE* THANK YOU SO MUCH TO EVERYONE(trying to comment back) I got on tonight thinking that I probably wouldn't have any replys, and I had 80! I cried ladies! CRIED reading them. First off, THANK YOU for complimenting Lyric. I think she's absolutely beautiful. Second, I live in Oklahoma so her name is like EXTRA different here! But I LOVE that! Third, I have a notebook and I'm writing down EVERYTHING. He sent me some pretty nasty texts that I have saved in my phone! I am speaking with a rep from the family court system as of Monday.

But in all honestly I think he was just trying to scare me into him being able to controll me. I was always there after everything. I just let him walk all over me.

As of yesterday I stopped arguing with him. Never raised my voice. Didn't resond to any messages unless they were about Lyric. AND HES ALREADY PISSED OFF THAT IM TAKIN CONTOL! haha. I'm in my parents house right now but found out today I GOT ACCEPTED INTO A APARTMENT!!!!!! OH YESS!!! I will be doing ME and LYRIC and I'll show him whats up!

I wanna thank you all for your prayers and ask you keep doing it! God wouldn't let anything happen to that beautiful angel! I've already gotten 10x more confidence after standing up for me and lyric for JUST ONE DAY. He has no idea whats gonna hit him!

THANK YOU ALL I LOVE YOU GUYS! (damn im crying again)

 

 

 i'm 21 years old, I have a beautiful daughter Lyric who is 8 months old.

I met her father at one of his concerts. Since then we have been together. That was 3 years ago in aug. We seriously were good for each other. i put up with alot of his shit. He had gotten 2 DUIs and he was going through a drug court program. Jail time. supported his band. supported him when he lost his job for over a yr. took care of his friends. lots of things.

then i got pregnant and we had to move in with my parents to save money. he would party and not come home. while i worked tons of hrs to help save money and he would just spend and spend. we were there for almost 7 months and had nothing to show for it. so i took out a cash loan and got us into a small apartment right before lyric came. he was perfect whhen she was first born. helped and everything. but i think he got overwelmed. then he wouldn't come home. started lying. he got out of drug court finally and the partying just got worse. drugs were started.

then he started leaving for weeks at a time saying its b/c i didnt clean good enough for him? as in cleaning house? i cleaned and cleaned that house but it was never good enough for him.

he kicked me and lyric out saying that i dont clean good enough and if i cared about him i would clean house better. im back at my parents house. and he moved another girl in with a son age 2. so i doubt cleaning was the problem.

well this girl hangs with people who smoke pot alot! and they do it around their children. i do not want lyric around that. so ive been trying to let him see her but i dont want her there. he keeps choosing her over lyric.. so i dont feel bad about him not seeing her.

this is what i need help with...

yesterday he called screaming and yelling at me about how hes gonna take me to court and take lyric from me and ill be paying him child support.

can he do that? he hasnt helped me with her for 2 months. hasnt bought ANYTHING. has seen her maybe 3 times total. MAYBE.

I do everything for her she is my life. she is all i have right now. i cant lose her.
p.s sorry so long i have no one to turn to...

my babycakes lyric elaine

[slashteddy]

Get a lawyer before he does. They'll be able to give you way better legal advice than anyone on here, unless there's some CM users who are lawyers. Good luck. :(

[cnlsmommy]

Agreed. Maybe contact legal aid if need be. Start a journal of ALL pertinent info, even go backwards and write down what you remember about when he called, what he does, what he says, EVERYTHING. As far as him taking her, family court still continues to slightly favor mom in custody disputes. You can also request drug testing (for both of you) as part of the court proceedings.

Quoting slashteddy:

Get a lawyer before he does. They'll be able to give you way better legal advice than anyone on here, unless there's some CM users who are lawyers. Good luck. :(

[lyricsmommy347]

 He just scared me so much with him screaming and yelling.. he cant afford a lawyer i know for a fact he cant... i just dont want to lose her...

i've never done anything but smoke cigs in high school and drink beer. so id gladdly be okay with drug testing.

i guess im just scared.

Quoting cnlsmommy:

Agreed. Maybe contact legal aid if need be. Start a journal of ALL pertinent info, even go backwards and write down what you remember about when he called, what he does, what he says, EVERYTHING. As far as him taking her, family court still continues to slightly favor mom in custody disputes. You can also request drug testing (for both of you) as part of the court proceedings.

Quoting slashteddy:

Get a lawyer before he does. They'll be able to give you way better legal advice than anyone on here, unless there's some CM users who are lawyers. Good luck. :(

 

[slashteddy]

That's entirely understandable. Honestly though, even if it's an empty threat, maybe it would be best to go ahead and get custody court out of the way? Like, take HIM to court and get it settled officially, so he can't threaten you with it anymore. If you're still unsure of what to do, you can usually call a lawyer and explain to them your situation, and ask what your next course of action should be; if they think you have a case they'll definitely recommend court.

Quoting lyricsmommy347:

 He just scared me so much with him screaming and yelling.. he cant afford a lawyer i know for a fact he cant... i just dont want to lose her...

i've never done anything but smoke cigs in high school and drink beer. so id gladdly be okay with drug testing.

i guess im just scared.

Quoting cnlsmommy:

Agreed. Maybe contact legal aid if need be. Start a journal of ALL pertinent info, even go backwards and write down what you remember about when he called, what he does, what he says, EVERYTHING. As far as him taking her, family court still continues to slightly favor mom in custody disputes. You can also request drug testing (for both of you) as part of the court proceedings.

Quoting slashteddy:

Get a lawyer before he does. They'll be able to give you way better legal advice than anyone on here, unless there's some CM users who are lawyers. Good luck. :(

 

[lyricsmommy347]

 dont they normally give free legal advice? i might just do that

Quoting slashteddy:

That's entirely understandable. Honestly though, even if it's an empty threat, maybe it would be best to go ahead and get custody court out of the way? Like, take HIM to court and get it settled officially, so he can't threaten you with it anymore. If you're still unsure of what to do, you can usually call a lawyer and explain to them your situation, and ask what your next course of action should be; if they think you have a case they'll definitely recommend court.

Quoting lyricsmommy347:

 He just scared me so much with him screaming and yelling.. he cant afford a lawyer i know for a fact he cant... i just dont want to lose her...

i've never done anything but smoke cigs in high school and drink beer. so id gladdly be okay with drug testing.

i guess im just scared.

Quoting cnlsmommy:

Agreed. Maybe contact legal aid if need be. Start a journal of ALL pertinent info, even go backwards and write down what you remember about when he called, what he does, what he says, EVERYTHING. As far as him taking her, family court still continues to slightly favor mom in custody disputes. You can also request drug testing (for both of you) as part of the court proceedings.

Quoting slashteddy:

Get a lawyer before he does. They'll be able to give you way better legal advice than anyone on here, unless there's some CM users who are lawyers. Good luck. :(

 

 

[cnlsmommy]

Of course it's scary. People on drugs are scary (as a whole). Def start journaling. Also, when possible, have your interactions witnessed by someone or check your state laws and see if you can legally record the conversations.

Quoting lyricsmommy347:

 He just scared me so much with him screaming and yelling.. he cant afford a lawyer i know for a fact he cant... i just dont want to lose her...

i've never done anything but smoke cigs in high school and drink beer. so id gladdly be okay with drug testing.

i guess im just scared.

Quoting cnlsmommy:

Agreed. Maybe contact legal aid if need be. Start a journal of ALL pertinent info, even go backwards and write down what you remember about when he called, what he does, what he says, EVERYTHING. As far as him taking her, family court still continues to slightly favor mom in custody disputes. You can also request drug testing (for both of you) as part of the court proceedings.

Quoting slashteddy:

Get a lawyer before he does. They'll be able to give you way better legal advice than anyone on here, unless there's some CM users who are lawyers. Good luck. :(

 

[Slayton723]

With him not having a job, being around drugs and doing them as well as not helping any I highly doubt any judge would choose a jobless druggie father over a hard working drug free mother.

[i.love.my.life]

Request a drug test in court. Bring up his past drug, alcohol, and partying ways. I would find a lawyer who can help you for cheap or even free. File papers before he does requesting sole custody with supervised visits.

[slashteddy]

Sometimes. And then, sometimes, they do without meaning to. ;) The few times I've needed a lawyer and called up a firm, I had to explain what was going on, and the person I talked to would tell me things like, "Well first of all you need to make sure you __________" etc. before officially taking the case.

Also do a google search for free legal advice in your area. In my city there's a legal aide society that mainly helps low income people with legal representation. If all else fails, I found this site, which may help. :)

Quoting lyricsmommy347:

 dont they normally give free legal advice? i might just do that

Quoting slashteddy:

That's entirely understandable. Honestly though, even if it's an empty threat, maybe it would be best to go ahead and get custody court out of the way? Like, take HIM to court and get it settled officially, so he can't threaten you with it anymore. If you're still unsure of what to do, you can usually call a lawyer and explain to them your situation, and ask what your next course of action should be; if they think you have a case they'll definitely recommend court.

Quoting lyricsmommy347:

 He just scared me so much with him screaming and yelling.. he cant afford a lawyer i know for a fact he cant... i just dont want to lose her...

i've never done anything but smoke cigs in high school and drink beer. so id gladdly be okay with drug testing.

i guess im just scared.

Quoting cnlsmommy:

Agreed. Maybe contact legal aid if need be. Start a journal of ALL pertinent info, even go backwards and write down what you remember about when he called, what he does, what he says, EVERYTHING. As far as him taking her, family court still continues to slightly favor mom in custody disputes. You can also request drug testing (for both of you) as part of the court proceedings.

Quoting slashteddy:

Get a lawyer before he does. They'll be able to give you way better legal advice than anyone on here, unless there's some CM users who are lawyers. Good luck. :(

 

 

[sdunaway08]

I seriously doubt seeing any judge take a child away from a stable parent to give to a drug riddled one. One thing would prevent this from happening, request a court ordered UA. Especially if you know he is going to test positive. They will never let a child, especially a baby go into custody of a druggy.