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VENTING....BUT COULD USE SOME ADVICE!

Posted by on Aug. 22, 2012 at 2:10 PM
  • 7 Replies

So I just recently found out that I am pregnant with my second child and I am extremely happy. However, I went to share this excitement with my suppose to be "best friend"....and all she said was" oh wow, well congrats" in the least most meaningful way. That was not the reaction I expected from her. She has been extremely distant from me for several months now but i figured it was just due to having busy schedules. BUT this just put me over the top....what should I do?

by on Aug. 22, 2012 at 2:10 PM
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Replies (1-7):
HollyBerry727
by on Aug. 22, 2012 at 2:43 PM
Is it possible she could be trying to get pregnant herself and having no luck? I know some women get sad when they are trying and other ppl close to them get pregnant.
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happymommy1105
by on Aug. 22, 2012 at 2:45 PM
Let it go.

Just because somebody isn't as over the moon as you about your pregnancy doesn't make them a bad person.

Maybe her grandma died this morning and she hasn't told you yet.
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raye-chan
by Raye on Aug. 22, 2012 at 2:47 PM


Quoting happymommy1105:

Let it go.

Just because somebody isn't as over the moon as you about your pregnancy doesn't make them a bad person.

Maybe her grandma died this morning and she hasn't told you yet.


ltmana
by on Aug. 22, 2012 at 2:49 PM
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My childless best friend (who isn't my best friend anymore) was really hot and cold about my pregnancy. She would make vague fb statuses like "having a child will suck your soul" all the time. She would always go out to party and rarely try to make plans with me that I could actually attend.
I quit talking to her. Don't need people like that around.
I'd give it a little while to see if maybe she's just having a bad day or something but if it turns into what I dealt with, drop her.
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Momma2013
by on Aug. 22, 2012 at 2:58 PM

I would just ask her what's going on. Explain that you are excited about the pregnancy and ask if there's something you did wrong? Maybe you said something the last time you were together that upset her. Or she could just be having an off day. It's not very common that you stay best friends with one person your whole life. People change, they go through life at different stages. Some hurry and have kids, others wait and do other things they want more first.

You don't have to drop her from being a friend, but maybe just see each other around your bdays or something because you're at different points in your lives... I don't know the whole situation, but just a suggestion.

LtLadyFx
by on Aug. 22, 2012 at 3:00 PM
1 mom liked this

I don't know her but I'm going to go with either she's jealous, trying to get pregnant herself and can't, or she's still in party mode and just isn't crazy about it. It all depends on where she's at in life herself. I have a friend who hates talking about my babies with me because she can't get pregnant herself, I have friends who have dropped me because they are nowhere near wanting kids and want friends who can go out and party with them all of the time.

If she is your best friend, take the time and talk to her about it. If she is uninterested in having that conversation then she is not worth wasting time over. You deserve better.

novababy1112
by on Aug. 22, 2012 at 4:07 PM

I agree with all of these replies...she may just be going through a rough time rite now and hasnt talked to you about it yet, or she may be trying herself, or she may be at a different stage in her life and isnt all that thrilled about children, im wandering tho..how old is ur first? maybe she has been distant bc she is jealous not bc she is trying but maybe she is jealous bc of all the time you have to devote to ur child and she doesnt get as much time with you herself and if thats the case it would upset her that you are haveing another and are gonna have even less time...id say talk to her..let her know that u feel like you guys havent been as close and that she didnt seem thrilled about the baby news and ask her if there is something wrong..let her know that you are there for her :) she mite b needing your support even if she doesnt tell you wats wrong..sometimes u just dont wanna talk about it but its nice to know ur best friend will b there when you do..so try not to push her too much and try not to b upset about her not being as excited as u would like her to be...there mite b a lagit reason for it...but also keep in mind that friendships sometimes grow apart bc of lifestyle changes doesnt mean u have to quite being friends all together..i have been through the same thing with my best friend quite often the last yr or so bc of lifestyle changes and now im having a baby (she already has 2 but she had them both when we started getting so close) but with us both having kids and me just starting my family it means less time with eachother..but we have done really good about talking it out and getting through it..of course there have been arguements but all friends fight sometimes :)

i wish you the best of luck!!! dont stress over it too much ik thats alot easier said than done but try :)

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