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im scared of myself!

Posted by on Aug. 25, 2012 at 5:55 AM
  • 5 Replies
I'm so upset.. its 6 in the morning and I'm sitting here crying because I don't know what to do anymore. My boyfriend and I live at his parents house in Florida and I moved down here prbably three months ago right before I gave birth to our son. I'm at the point where I just can't control my temper with him anymore. We sleep in different rooms (because I snore) but its little things. We will get into an arguement and ill ask him to get ouf of my room( I share a room with the baby) and hell continue to sit there saying its okay, no I'm fine, blah blah and ill ask again for 15 minutes this can go on. If I go to get out of the roomcause I'm starting to get pissed he'll get up and stand infront od the door. Or he will say just give me a kiss and I will leave and ill give him a kiss and he's like now a hug.. he turns it into a game and I get scared of the things I think. I just want to punch him in the face and that scares me. It scares me that I'm so quick to say hurtful things just to get him to leave me alone.. maybe its resentment for me not staying in Jersey with my family who has yet to meet my son and how i have no friends and sont know a aoul out here besideshis parents and him and hes not working so im with him alllllllllllll theeeee timeeeee and that shouldnt bother me but idk . If i leave to go run to the store he calls me and if i dont amswerhell call again to ask me where i am and how im doing stupid stuff!! PLEASE HELP. Its everything not just me asking him to leave. I'm at my breaking point where I'm threatening him to leave and go back to Jersey with my friends and family. Idk what else
by on Aug. 25, 2012 at 5:55 AM
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by on Aug. 25, 2012 at 6:11 AM
After the birth of my DD I was like this. I was with my dh I left him when I.first got.pregnant long story we back together now. But when I had her I was on my own. I had a good friend with me though. He said I scared him with the way I'd say things. Like I mad a comment about running the car off the road bc a passanger pissed me off. I remember just a simple conversation and the Guy being a dick. I don't remember being one. I use to get do mad I'd dream of beating people. I was depressed. I never felt bad towards my kid. I loved her still do LOL. I hated men I hated anybody else LOL.

Your man provably plays these little games BC he thinks he is loosing you. You just had a baby you don't share a bed your relationship can feel inappropriate to him because it isn't his ideal one. Doesn't mean he isn't happy just mean he wants more. And he doesn't know how to handle this version of you. I strongly suggest that you talk to a therapist. And you can also talk to your Dr a night guard can help with the snoring so can breathright strips. It'll be worth it. And as for him just find a peaceful time where you can gain control of yourself and just talk to him tell him how you feel. Especially if you regret your negative feelings. Trust me if you two can talk open mindedly and open hearted you'll be better off.
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by on Aug. 25, 2012 at 8:10 AM

I'm sorry your having such a hard time hun! It's probable a mix of things. The fact that you just had a baby, moved away from family/friends, and you are together 24/7. You need a break and that's understandable. But, you also need to talk to him about how you feel and let him know that you need some time alone and maybe take a visit back home with the baby ALONE to get some space from the two of you. Hope everything get's worked out!

*~*Wifey To Tommy(2.4.11), Mommy to Allyana(7.5.08), & Our angel baby Jovanny(3.6.10)*~*

by Amanda on Aug. 25, 2012 at 8:15 AM
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i'm so sorry you are feeling this way. sending tons of  *hugs* your way.

by on Aug. 25, 2012 at 12:49 PM
Thank you ladies you are right!
by on Aug. 25, 2012 at 3:56 PM
Get into a gym go hit the punching bag it helps with the stress and the anger belive me I knw
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