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20 Something Moms 20 Something Moms

Me and DH have a 16month old boy and I've been telling him i want another baby when Nate is at-least 2 if not 3,and he says NOwe okay with having just one child.I soo don't agree with this,i badly want another baby in the near future,especially a girl and he wanted a girl too but we got a boy.So i think his afraid that if i get pregnant it might just be a boy again,but i just think he doesn't want another baby period.!!!

So im afraid that if i got pregnant he would be pissed as hell and resent me cause if that would be the case i wouldnt have an abortion,im dead set against those.And its not like we wouldnt be able to afford the baby anyway.So i just wanted to know from you ladies if you've ever experienced something like this and how did you deal with it?

by on Oct. 5, 2012 at 2:45 AM
Replies (11-12):
krayzbabylove
by on Oct. 5, 2012 at 5:31 AM
I know how frustrating it is to be so ready, and your partner not be ready. That was what happened to me, then I ended up.pregnant, unplanned and he was so upset. Turns out he was cheating on me, and ended up that I left him soon after I found out. I don't want anyone to feel the way I felt with an unsupportive husband, who hated that I was pregnant. Some think, that if they just do it, their Dh will come around. I say, its not worth the hurt. I hope you and he are able to get on the same page about this soon. Baby fever sucks!

Quoting BevLuc:



Quoting krayzbabylove:

You both need to want another child. Period. Accidents happen, but to go behind his back would be wrong.


And i would never go behind his back,i want him to want to have another child too.

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GodsAmiga
by Member on Oct. 5, 2012 at 5:52 AM

I don't think he'd resent you unless you purposely went behind his back to get preggo. He might be a little freaked out or overwhelmed at first otherwise but I bet at the very least when he met the baby he would fall in love. :-) However, my husband and I have an agreement. We BOTH have to agree on having another baby (if it was an accident then of course we'd be fine but when it comes to trying...). Some people it just takes longer for them to be want another baby. I wouldn't set a deadline for when to have another. Talk to him about the fact that you really do want another baby someday and ask him to keep an open mind and let you know if he decides it's a good time. Then don't bring it up again for a while. If it's been like 6 months or more maybe ease it into a conversation but no nagging. Just maybe slip it in somewhere (i.e., talking about Disneyland you could mention, "I hope when we have more kids we'll be able to take a family trip there" and then keep moving on away from the subject.). The bottom line is that people need space to come around to wanting another baby. After our first my husband was ready to try for another when she was 9 months but I wasn't ready until she was nearly a year. After our second I was ready after 6 months but it took until she was almost 2 before he was ready. Everyone is different. :-)

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