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Why did you marry someone in the military?

Posted by on Oct. 23, 2012 at 12:55 PM
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For me, when we met my husband was on IRR status and not having to do any military things. A year after we married, we discussed it and he joined the Army National Guard. When we discussed it did I know how hard everything would be? No. Now since he is NG instead of active duty things are different for us. When he's home he has his civilian  job that he goes to everyday, but he also has his guard duties that are normally one weekend a month and two weeks a year for annual training. We've been married for five years now.  Most of the times that he has been gone have been split up with months between having to be gone.

We found out July of last year that he would be deploying at the end of the year. After that, he was gone quite a bit for training as guard doesn't do the amount of active duty throughout the year. He left the end of October last year and will finally be coming home soon. Has this year been difficult? Yes. Have we had fights? Yes. But honestly the hardest part is seeing my two little boys wanting daddy home so bad. Has this deployment had a negative impact on their relationship with their father? No. They miss him. They want him home, and even though they are both young, they do remember who daddy is and can't wait for him to be home just like me.

To be completely honest, this deployment has made me stronger as a person, as a mother, and as a wife. I didn't marry my husband thinking "Oh, well he won't be home much so maybe we shouldn't get married" I married him because I love him. Plain and simple. He is the man that I plan on spending the rest of my life with. Yes, there have been numerous stressors this year and it does suck having to do certain things on my own. It sucks that he missed some of the kids firsts. It sucked that he missed our youngests first birthday. It sucks that he missed trick or treating, Thanksgiving and Christmans, but we made it work.

As soon as we found out he was deploying we downloaded skype on our computers so we could video chat. There have been times where it's been a few days to a month or two that we weren't able to talk, but we made it work. Did I worry myself sick those times that I didn't hear from him? Of course I did because, big surprise here, I LOVE HIM!

That is the entire reason I do all of this. I love him. He is providing for our family and doing what he can to keep our family safe and everyone else that resides in the U.S.A. I can't tell you how many times I have had people tell me that they wouldn't be able to do what I do, but you know I felt the same way before I had to do it.  When my husband is home, he is the most amazing father and husband I know. Do I complain about him? Sure, there are things he does that annoy the shit out of me, but that doesn't mean I don't love him. He does is best to be a great father and husband when he isn't home as well.

Marrying someone in the military isn't about the money or worrying about how much they will be gone. Everyone that I know that is married to, engaged to, or dating someone in the military put up with everything because they love them.

All other military s/o's feel free to share your story too. I'd love to hear them and maybe some people will actually learn something.

come home

Patiently waiting the return of my soldier while loving my two little boys.

Proud Army National Guard Wife.

by on Oct. 23, 2012 at 12:55 PM
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by on Oct. 23, 2012 at 1:01 PM
We were in the same unit. Lol. We just loved each other! Going on 8 years!
by on Oct. 23, 2012 at 1:06 PM

I did not marry into the military... Mine joined after we were married, because he wanted to be someone that his son would be proud of.  And he wanted me to be able to stay home with the kids.

by Silver Member on Oct. 23, 2012 at 1:23 PM
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Because I wanted to be a single mother.

Because I wanted a man who would abandon me.

Because I wanted our daughter to be raised without her father.

Because I wanted to live off a few dollars a month

Because I didn't love him.

by on Oct. 23, 2012 at 1:42 PM
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I married him because I love him and wanns spend the rest of my life with him.

CafeMom Tickers
by on Oct. 23, 2012 at 1:43 PM
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My dh and I have have been together since hs. He joined after graduation. Was ad for four yrs got out for three and now is a recruiter for the nat guard. He's my one true love.
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by on Oct. 23, 2012 at 1:51 PM
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Because he made me happier then any one ever has, he gets me, he puts up with my emotions....however crazy they maybe, hes a great lover wonderful man and an even better friend. Because i just plain love the shit outta him!! Into our 6th year of marriage, through 1 deployment, and even now that he is out of the army i know if he were to find a better unit he would consider reenlisting and i would stand beside him in his choice. He loved the army....just hated his unit the chain of command sucked!!
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by on Oct. 23, 2012 at 1:54 PM
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Because we were best friends before the Navy. Hes getting out now though, he doesnt want to miss out on the kids growing up. Last 3 days of Navy now!!
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by on Oct. 23, 2012 at 2:32 PM
Love. :)
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by on Oct. 24, 2012 at 12:07 AM
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I married my husband because he treated my son as if he was his own.  Even if he was not in the military I would still married him.  Here we are 13 years, seven deployments and five kids later holding strong.  I would not have it any other way.

by on Oct. 24, 2012 at 12:17 AM
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Me and my DH where on the same ship together for 3 years and friendship turned into love. I think as a military wife of anykind active duty , reserves and retired this is the hardest relationship out there. I love my husband we have been through 3 deployments and now we live oversea's but I wouldn't want it any other way. I have to agree with OP I am much stronger because of it and I thank god for my husband and his strength to leave and do what he has to do. 

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