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What things did you do for yourself after becoming a mom?

Posted by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 11:09 AM
  • 15 Replies

10 Simple Ways New Moms Can Get Time to Themselves

by Nicole Fabian-Weber 

new momVanessa Lachey recently admit to having the "baby blues" after giving birth to her son, Camden John. In a blog post, she details how she felt "lost, unloved, alone and at [her] wit's end" shortly after becoming a mom. Lachey found herself crying one day for no reason at all, and not knowing what to do, she got in her car and left.

After driving around a bit, Vanessa went to a Starbucks. And when she came home, she showered, got dressed, and immediately felt better. It was the first time she had done anything for herself since giving birth, and it's a perfect example of just how badly women need some time alone after becoming mothers. It isn't selfish; it doesn't make you a bad mom; it's important. Having a baby is hard and stressful. Taking a little time for here and there for yourself is crucial -- and, actually, it's a lot less difficult than it seems.

Here are 10 small ways new moms can carve out some much-needed time for themselves.

1. Be the one who does the grocery run. In the past, grocery shopping may not have seemed like a luxurious thing, but 45 minutes by yourself can be incredibly rejuvenating -- even if it's at Trader Joe's. (You probably won't want to do this until bleeding has stopped, though, which varies from woman to woman.)

2. Take a walk. Doesn't get much easier than this. Grab your iPod, and take a few laps around the block. (This one was a big one for me at around week three!)

3. Get a pedicure. You'll likely realize just how tired you are when sitting in that massage chair, but the calm you'll feel will be like no other. This is the perfect thing to do about a month in, after you sort of have the hang of things.

4. Separate if you're out together. If your partner, baby, and you all decide to go to the mall, go off on your own for a half hour.

5. Get a chair massage. If taking an entire hour isn't something you want to do shortly after becoming a mom (and you don't want to spend a million dollars), get a 15-minute chair massage at a nail salon. I recommend waiting until you have the hang of nursing for this one, as leaning down on sore, cracked nipples is pretty much the opposite of zen.

6. If you're nursing, start pumping. Nobody likes pumping. Nobody. But it definitely has its benefits. Once you're a month-and-a-half in or so, try pumping a little milk, so you can leave for an hour and not feel panicked that your little one is going to go hungry.

7. Take a drive. Like Vanessa did, you don't need an actual destination. Sometimes it's nice to just drive around blasting music for a little while. (You may wind up at a Starbucks, too!)

8. Just be alone. This is something you can do right off the bat. Find a quiet place in your home or yard and just be. Don't think about your baby, or wonder how you're doing as a mom, just sit with your thoughts for a while. You'll feel "lighter" after clearing your head of all thoughts for a bit.

9. Cook dinner. Again, not the most glamorous thing -- and don't try to bust out the duck confit here -- but being the person who prepares dinner can actually be somewhat relaxing. Put on a little music, and keep it simple while you're partner bonds with baby.

10. Exercise. You obviously need to wait to get the okay for this (which usually isn't until around month 2), but nothing -- seriously, nothing -- feels as good as kick-ass sweat session.

What things did you do for yourself after becoming a mom?

by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 11:09 AM
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by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 12:00 PM
I brought myself new bras and panties I needed them now my daughter is 4 .I just focus on buying her the things she need I will sneak a pair of sweat pants in for myself every now and then.
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by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:31 PM


by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:45 PM

After my first son, I thought I had to do everything myself and I was miserable for MONTHS. 

The second time around I made sure I got some time on my own, even if it was just running errands.  I pumped so DH could feed him and went grocery shopping, to the bank, any viable excuse to get some time to myself. 

by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 3:17 PM

i got my hair cut and spent a lot on make-up and got some new clothes but that was 8 years after i became a mom.

by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 3:40 PM

I honestly don't remember the early years.

I worked full time after my first and second were born, and up until halfway through my third pregnancy.

I'm really a 'family oriented' type mama... I don't really NEED "me" time away from my kids. I do things around the house that don't include them, like my crafting. And occasionally I will go to the grocery store alone if my husband's schedule will allow it. But I really prefer for all of us to go as a family.

On the rare occasion I do feel like I need some "me" space, I'm usually gone only a few minutes before I miss my babies and come back home.

by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 3:53 PM

Grocery shopping is my alone time lol

by on Mar. 9, 2013 at 9:54 AM

 hmm i dont have a  license so #1,#3, and #7 are not an option for me, I guess #5 also isn 't an option since i cannot drive myself to that either.

I do #8 a lot. I go in our room, take a bath, meditate, read, or exercize in there. Sometimes i'll grab our laundry, close the door and blast some music and dance and put away clothes like when I was a teen hehe

as for dinner...dh steals that from me, but i dont mind bc he's an awesome chef hehe

on occasion we separate in the store. especially if i'm searching for clothes haha. it takes me forever so he'll take our youngest in the cart and look at man clothes and i'll have the two older ones and look for something for myself (haven't found anything lately tho)

by on Mar. 9, 2013 at 10:39 AM

Ya, I did all of that with a baby strapped to me. I never got time to myself when my babies were small.

by on Mar. 9, 2013 at 10:46 AM

Going for waalks sometimes or getting a few minutes alone

by on Mar. 9, 2013 at 11:19 AM
At 6 weeks postpartum, I joined a step class. It helped me shed weight, feel better, and get out of the house. Otherwise, we try to do date nights (my husband and I) which gives us both a break. I don't do much on my own, though I asked to go grocery shopping without my kiddo the other day and dh didn't understand why I couldn't just take him with me lol I left alone anyway
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