This morning at 3:00am my friend Kayla woke Josh and I up knocking at the door. She was crying and said that her and her boyfriend Kevin had been arguing so she left. When I asked what happened she told me they decided to take a shower together and while he was rinsing off she noticed a tattoo of his ex's initials on his side up near his underarm (they've been together since Aug., so it must not be very big). I thought it was ridiculous that she'd get that mad and flip out about it. I mean, it's a tattoo, there's not much he can to do get rid of it. I told her that I didn't think she should be so upset about it and she told me that she doesn't understand why I'm not upset with Josh.
Josh and I've been together since '06, married in '08 and have 4 kids (9, 4 and 6 months old twins). He was married and in the process of divorcing his (abusive) wife of 2½ years when we met/got together. He has her name, Alicia, tattooed over the top of his left knee (it's about 1½" tall, 3" long) and a tattooed wedding ring (a black band).
He tattooed my wedding band at our wedding, but having her name tattooed hasn't bothered me. He doesn't wear shorts, so the only time I see it is when he doesn't have pants on or in the shower, and it doesn't bother me to see it during sex. I don't understand why some women get so mad about this. The way I look at it is that you're supposed to love somebody for them, and I love Josh because he's Josh; those tattoos are a part of who he is. He's asked me if I wanted him to cover her name up with something and I told him no for that reason.
So, how do you ladies feel about this? Would it bother you if your boyfriend/husband had a tattoo of his ex, and would you want him to cover it up?
I wouldnt be mad that is something he did before her, and that's his body, shes not his wife shes his girlfriend.
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Ehhh... I am a jealous one so it would bother me. My one ex got my name covered up on his chest... I'm assuming he did it becuase his gf at the time didnt like it. It just have really sucked to see my name on his chest with a little heart in it on his left pec when they had sex unless he kept his shirt on lol. My husband has my name on him... I don't have his and I don't plan on it.
about the only thing that would bother me would be a portrait. I sure would not like to look at her face. But aside from that it is what it is.
I guess it might. Particularly if it was large an obtrusive lol
But if it took her this long to notice it. . . then obviously it's not being shown off, you know? I'd be bothered if he got his ex's name tattooed on him WHILE WITH ME, you know? lol
You can always get it lasered off, but it doesn't take it sometimes doesn't take it out completely and it's expensive.
I told my DH when we met, that I would never hold anything from his past against him--that was all before he met me, and it all has nothing to do with me. What he does from now on is what I care about. So initials, no, I wouldn't care. It's a part of his past that made him who he is. A huge portrait, I would hate.
Though I would think the man would WANT to do something about it since he's not with her anymore. It is possible to have tattoos removed. Or, if its just initials, to turn it into a different word. But I wouldn't get all mad and show up at someone's doorstep at 3am over something that he obviously isn't going to be able to do something about at 3am anyways.
everyone has a past. Thats something your friend will have to look over if she wants things to work with her bf.
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