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Let Mommy Pee in Peace! Can you relate?

Posted by on May. 6, 2013 at 11:57 AM
  • 5 Replies

Hilarious 'Prayer for Privacy' Asks Toddlers Just to Let Mommy Pee in Peace

by The Stir Bloggers

Jane RoperJane Roper is one of the most eloquent writers and bloggers I have ever had the privilege to read. As a blogger for Babble, she discussed her now 6-year-old twins in an always funny, sometimes sarcastic, and refreshingly honest manner. She is also a novelist and memoirist whose book Double Time was recently released in paperback.

In addition, she has her own blog -- Jane's Calamity -- where she discusses her daughter Clio's cancer diagnosis and what it has meant in her family. Moving doesn't even begin to cover it. She has been kind enough to share a post with us for our Mother's Day celebration of bloggers we love. See below:

A Mother's Prayer for Privacy

Dear Lord,

Thank you for my beautiful, loving, creative, and otherwise spectacular children. I am grateful for the many blessings and profound love that they have brought to my life. I just have a few little requests:

I pray that I might be able to take a shower without one of my children coming into the bathroom, crying, to tell me that their sister hit them/pushed them/grabbed a toy or book away from them. Or telling me that they need help getting their shirt off. Or that they want a snack. Or that they’re going to poop.

Furthermore, I pray that they might not pull back the shower curtain, peek inside, and say, “I can see your butt!” or make other comments about my body — specifically the ways it differs from their own on account of my being an adult, thus requiring me to have mini-conversations with them about the way their bodies will change when they’re older while at the same time trying to rinse the shampoo out of my hair.

On a related note, I pray that maybe at least some of the time I could go to the bathroom without one of my children starting to open the door and come in, requiring me to yell, “Hey! Privacy, please!” Or without them simply standing outside the door yelling for me to help them find their scissors or tape/get them a drink/settle a dispute/etc.

Dear Lord, may they someday be able to settle their own disputes.

But I digress.

I pray that I may someday be able to get dressed without my daughters commenting on my boobs. And trying on my bras.

Actually, that’s not so bad. It’s kind of funny. Scratch that. I pray that I might be able to work at home, in my home office, while the girls are being looked after by their dad or a sitter, and not have them come up the stairs, open the door without knocking, and come in and try to crawl on my lap. Especially when I already have my laptop on my lap. Because it’s a fairly new MacBook Air, and I really like it.

BUT — corollary to that prayer (I’m allowed corollaries, right?) — I pray that my children will continue to want to crawl up onto my lap after they’ve eaten their breakfast/lunch/dinner while I’m still eating, because although it’s annoying, and at times makes me feel slightly claustrophobic, and/or results in food spillage, I know that their need for physical closeness to me won’t last much longer. And I want to cherish it while it’s still here.

Which is a roundabout way of saying thank you, O Lord, for my sweet, affectionate children, whom I treasure above all treasures (like, way way above the aforementioned MacBook Air).


PS: Even just the bathroom thing would be great.

Can you relate?

by on May. 6, 2013 at 11:57 AM
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Replies (1-5):
by on May. 6, 2013 at 2:54 PM
Haha! I can already relate even though my dd is only 8 months. When her dad is watching her and i'm in the shower he will come in carrying her saying oh, she wanted to visit mommy!...
by on May. 6, 2013 at 4:16 PM
by on May. 6, 2013 at 4:28 PM
Lol. I haven't peed in peace in 4 years. There's always a little head popping in to remind me that I have to sit to pee because I don't have a penis (just in case I've forgotten my gender).
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by on May. 6, 2013 at 4:34 PM
I can totally relate. Between the 4 year old and the cat I'm not really sure whose worse.
by on May. 6, 2013 at 7:29 PM

I have a 4 year old. Even in the middle of the night when i go to the bathroom she always seems to need me. the min i sit down lol

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